Hi I'm new

D

DaveOrlando

New member
Hi, I'm Dave in Orlando. I am new to this forum, and new to polymory. I am straight and curious about exploring with 2 females. I don't know the etiquette, protocol or niceties yet... so please forgive me if I offend anyone with my curiosity and ignorance. Thanks! :)
 
Welcome

I hope you find the info and support you're looking for on the forum.
 
welcome!
 
Welcome. What do you mean by "exploring with two females"? :confused:
 
exploring

I mean exploring the possibilities of what might take place. I am brand new to this, and a bit nervous & cautious.
 
Safe:)

Dave, you are safe here. It would be helpful to tell us a little more about what brought you here and what exactly you are looking for so we can get to know you a little better and understand where you're coming from.

(vague interest in "what would take place" with the relationship you are interested in doesn't give us much to chew on, and the people on this forum are truly out to be there for you, listen, teach, etc.)

How about some direct questions.

Are you currently single?
What is your concept of polyamory?
What attracted you to this website?
What is your background regarding relationships(monogamous, swinger, poly, etc)?
Any other info that would help us to understand what you're thinking about?

I look forward to getting to know you and recommend you read as many threads as you have time for to get to know the people, and how this forum works, also clarification on terms and language.

There is also a sticky section in "General Discussions" titled "Personal Summaries" where you can more fully introduce yourself and learn the backgrounds of others.

I got on this site only a couple of months ago and have really learned a lot and enjoyed the perspectives and support offered here.

Again, welcome.
 
I meant pretty much what rarechild spelled out ever so much better. I was rushing around when I replied. Please...introduce yourself further and share some details and get comfortable. People here are wonderful.
 
Thanks

Thanks for the welcomes!

I am used to public forums where you can get flamed for being too specific, so I learned to be vauge. I will try my best to open up; I am a man after all... you know how tight lipped we can be. (LOL)

Answers to Rarechilds questions (thanks for asking and helping out a "newbie").

Are you currently single? Yes (Divorced)

What is your concept of polyamory?
I gather from reading that it is an all-encompassing term for those who love and partner with more than one other. I really like the concept set forth on the website Trinogamy.org that is just like monogamy, but with three. I am straight, and have never been unfaithful... nor will i ever be; It's not in me.... I am not promiscuous.

What attracted you to this website?
I began researching "Poly" after learning that My Brother and his Wife's "roommate" is their triad partner. I wanted to know what is up with that? and if it something that I might be interested for my own life. I think it is.

What is your background regarding relationships(monogamous, swinger, poly, etc)? Always straight monogamous one-on-one. Never even tried a threesome. I have friends that are swingers, and that doesn't appeal to me.
To each their own... right?


Any other info that would help us to understand what you're thinking about?
I just want to be happy like everyone else. I have a lot to offer.. very romantic, and a gentleman always.

I am a professional entertainer, so some discretion is wise.

I hope this makes for a better introduction.. Again Thank you all.
~Dave~
 
Welcome to the forums! I think you will find that we are not a very judgemental bunch. Just ask anything you want.
 
well

Thanks,

I'm just trying to sort it out and work my way through the concept of multiple simultaneous romantic relationships; Still not sure it is right for me.

It's hard enough to figure out what one woman is thinking, let alone two. I guess I have a fear of them ganging up on me :D
 
DaveOrlando said:
It's hard enough to figure out what one woman is thinking, let alone two. I guess I have a fear of them ganging up on me :D
Click to expand...

If you read the messages posted on this forum, you'll notice that it's all about communication, not "figuring out what [someone else] is thinking".

Unless you happen to be one of those self-proclaimed "empaths" who ALWAYS knows what other people are thinking I mean feeling better than someone knows theirself.
 
Dave, I'm Trish and new to this also. You can read a bit more about me here...

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=704

Anyhow, something that I shared with my husband about this lifestyle (I'm the one who's done all the research and reading, thus far), is that in my opinion, it makes much more sense than what our society believes is the right way to have a relationship: one-one-one. Why do I think that?

Well...

let's consider the huge divorce rate we have in our country. Somehow it's okay for us to marry, divorce, marry, divorce, love em, leave em, love em, leave em. Why is that okay and it's not okay for us to love more than one at a time? I love my husband and don't want to live without him, but I am human and attraction (physical, emotional and mental) to others will occur. I would be lying if I said that would never happen.

I believe that we can each fulfill the areas of our lives that need love, attention, affection, stimulation, comfort, sympathy, etc. with more than one soul-mate. It just makes more sense to me than the way society views love and relationships.
 
The ability to engage in multiple romantic relationships definitely requires a certain skill in logistics but it also involves a genuine desire to look after more than one person's emotional and physical needs. I don't mean all of them but enough to keep them as loved as they expect. Looking after the sexual needs of multiple people might not be that challenging but handling the emotional needs of those same people might prove even more exhausting :eek:

Of course there is also the internal wiring aspect. Some people are naturally wired to romantically love more than one person i.e. Redpepper, and some people are not i.e. me.
Do you feel you have the capacity to sustain meaningful relationships with multiple people? Are you prepared for them to be involved with multiple partners as well?

Take care
Mono
 
Thanks for the responses.

SO much to think about... just trying to make sense of what's in my head and heart. I will keep up the self examinantion, and continue to read of others experiences here.
 
Welcome to the fold, Dave. All the best to you as you sort through what may well be the best decision you ever make.
 
Hi Dave... I'm also pretty new, both to the forum and polyamory. I'm married and we have a girlfriend, so I'm in the sort of relationship you described. :)

Welcome. :) I like it here, and hope you do, too!
 
Welcome aboard!
 
DaveOrlando said:
I guess I have a fear of them ganging up on me :D
Click to expand...

Women only?!!! no no my friend... two men can too. Believe me :D heh. Mono and my husband are relentless in their teasing and their love equally. I love all of it :)

There is lots to read here and I hope you are able to take the time to take a gander at it all...lots of really good information from lots of diverse people all searching for answers and giving good advice.

Hope you find what you are looking for. Just take it slow and stay open... there is a lot of work to be done, but it is a really awesome life to those who do the work and who "fit" poly.
 
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