What irks me the most is that when I did ask him if we still were following this particular boundary he was very clear to me that I needed to make sure I let him know if and when I sent anything to my bf, but then he did the exact opposite and couldn't even tell me that he broke the boundary. As many posters have said, boundaries can't be one sided, they have to be agreed upon by those making the boundaries.
I am leaning towards just letting this one go but wonder if this is just leaving the door open for more dishonesty in the future. All in all, a video is a very minor thing in the whole scheme of things.
Whoa whoa whoa that makes you even less wrong for snooping than I thought you were! It was EXPLICITLY and TOGETHERLY (i left my ivy-league vocabulary at work for the weekend) decided when you revisited this to keep that rule/boundary? Well, I think what we have here is a case of "Do as I say, not as I do"?. YOU are the "child" in this relationship, it seems.
Now before I get all judgmental and shit, you should tell your husband what happened and get him over here to give us all his side of the story. As far as i'm concerned, you have the moral high-ground according to the information that is available to me.
I better stop because when I get going like this, I can really make people mad.