⭐ Looking for my TRIBE ⭐

Jem

New member
Hi Community!... My name is JEM, an 33 Years old, Argentinian girl living in Berlin since one year now :)
First of all I would like to thank you all for this amazing E-space and vibes that you created in here!! I felt very safe and accompanied reading the forums, comments and articles.
To present my self I would try to give a brief introduction:
I remember myself as a little girl (4years) when I started to give pleasure to my self while discovering my body. I was very curious. I remember very well that I wanted to kiss everyone and I was ready to explore every time I was close to another body. Women body was for me irresistible and every time it was an opportunity I loved to play roleplay with other girlfriends... But I didn't care much about genders. Porno lover, fantasies creator...
Although my mother was always present and sweet while explain that I need to use a private place to masturbate and so on... growing up took something from that free sexual spirit that it was inside me.

As an adult I have been in a long monogamous relationship for 8 years. Then I broke up and met some guys just to have sex with them until I met my Ex-girlfriend and finally I found myself as a happy Bisexual person <3
When starting this relationship I somehow knew that I could feel love for more than one person so I explain this to my girlfriend in one of our first dates and she was ok with that. We experienced an amazing year full of love and sexual experience between us and sometimes with more people (mostly threesomes - always playing together). We had so much love to give that it was somehow natural to share it and it was a beautiful experience. We end up the relationship because it turns to be very dependent and I could not find love on it anymore.

I spend almost 2 years with my self, trying to reconnect and to get over the breakup situation. After this broke ups I started to feel shy while meeting other people and very "traditional" at the time of having sex for example.

As I said, one year ago I moved into Berlin, a beautiful, open and inspire city looking for new experiences. As soon as I arrive here I was feeling very much connected with the curiosity of opening myself to the new. I come to live with a very close friend of mine: F. I always feel inspired by him, by his way of see and confront life... his positivity and all the colors that he express with his personality. One year ago we realize that we were in love with each other and we decided to start this "adventure" F is a gay man and that was clear since the beginning. Also this started as an open and polyamory relationship.

I have all the freedom to meet people of course and I never had as much as support and understanding to go and explore my sexuality... but some how I feel blocked. I am not open enough to meet new people and every time he is meeting a guy and stay in someone's house after a nice sex and cuddle night the jealousy is crazy and that doesn't allow me to put the focus on my self. Somehow I feel sick when I see his freedom and openness and I don't allow myself to have new exeriences... i lose self esteem and I don't really know what I want despite the fact that I feel terrible about this feelings on the person I love.

I always thought that I was a very sexual person... But now I don't know it anymore.
I feel that I need to discuss this with more and new people, to get new points of views. I would be more than happy to hear/read your experiences.

I would love to find the JEM that I describe in the beginning.

Thanks for reading... and as I said: looking forward to find my tribe!
Have lovely evening ahead!
Happy to be here :)

All the best,
JEM ⭐
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Greetings Jem,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

It sounds like you need to discover yourself as your need to love more than one, and to discover your need for others, like you are actually jealous of F's ability to get out there and discover other people. You need to discover how to love other people.

If it would help, you can read my story at https://polyamory.com/threads/kevins-hetero-mfm-poly-fi-v.68427/#post-257039 ... the first few posts is what you'd especially want to read. Also you can ask me any questions you have to ask, and I will be happy to do my best to answer. Poly is a good thing, for almost anyone who wants to try it, you just need to communicate, and to come back to this forum often for advice. I will help you in any way that I can.

You won't need to look far for your tribe, you can find it right here. Good luck!
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter" :)

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

Please read through the guidelines if you haven't already.

Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

If you have any questions about the board itself, please private-message a mod and they'll do their best to help.

Welcome aboard!
 

cornishrob123

New member
Hi Community!... My name is JEM, an 33 Years old, Argentinian girl living in Berlin since one year now :)
First of all I would like to thank you all for this amazing E-space and vibes that you created in here!! I felt very safe and accompanied reading the forums, comments and articles.
To present my self I would try to give a brief introduction:
I remember myself as a little girl (4years) when I started to give pleasure to my self while discovering my body. I was very curious. I remember very well that I wanted to kiss everyone and I was ready to explore every time I was close to another body. Women body was for me irresistible and every time it was an opportunity I loved to play roleplay with other girlfriends... But I didn't care much about genders. Porno lover, fantasies creator...
Although my mother was always present and sweet while explain that I need to use a private place to masturbate and so on... growing up took something from that free sexual spirit that it was inside me.

As an adult I have been in a long monogamous relationship for 8 years. Then I broke up and met some guys just to have sex with them until I met my Ex-girlfriend and finally I found myself as a happy Bisexual person <3
When starting this relationship I somehow knew that I could feel love for more than one person so I explain this to my girlfriend in one of our first dates and she was ok with that. We experienced an amazing year full of love and sexual experience between us and sometimes with more people (mostly threesomes - always playing together). We had so much love to give that it was somehow natural to share it and it was a beautiful experience. We end up the relationship because it turns to be very dependent and I could not find love on it anymore.

I spend almost 2 years with my self, trying to reconnect and to get over the breakup situation. After this broke ups I started to feel shy while meeting other people and very "traditional" at the time of having sex for example.

As I said, one year ago I moved into Berlin, a beautiful, open and inspire city looking for new experiences. As soon as I arrive here I was feeling very much connected with the curiosity of opening myself to the new. I come to live with a very close friend of mine: F. I always feel inspired by him, by his way of see and confront life... his positivity and all the colors that he express with his personality. One year ago we realize that we were in love with each other and we decided to start this "adventure" F is a gay man and that was clear since the beginning. Also this started as an open and polyamory relationship.

I have all the freedom to meet people of course and I never had as much as support and understanding to go and explore my sexuality... but some how I feel blocked. I am not open enough to meet new people and every time he is meeting a guy and stay in someone's house after a nice sex and cuddle night the jealousy is crazy and that doesn't allow me to put the focus on my self. Somehow I feel sick when I see his freedom and openness and I don't allow myself to have new exeriences... i lose self esteem and I don't really know what I want despite the fact that I feel terrible about this feelings on the person I love.

I always thought that I was a very sexual person... But now I don't know it anymore.
I feel that I need to discuss this with more and new people, to get new points of views. I would be more than happy to hear/read your experiences.

I would love to find the JEM that I describe in the beginning.

Thanks for reading... and as I said: looking forward to find my tribe!
Have lovely evening ahead!
Happy to be here :)

All the best,
JEM ⭐
My partner is from Argentina she amazing lol . Bit fiery but awesome.
 

Nadgee

New member
I really enjoyed reading your story JEM and thank you for being so vulnerable. What a gift to us all !!
 
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