Northern Virginia Man Seeking Girlfriend


I'm married, I've got two young kids and two dogs. I'm always looking to learn and try something different, and I am definitely a geek - spend much time around me and you will hear quite a few quotes, from TV shows, movies and even books. I am an engineer, and very scientific about the way I approach things and yet I love to read and keep wishing I would sit down and write some of the ideas that are in my head. I think I have a great sense of humor (I know not everyone gets it, and I am completely okay with that) but it generally seems to involve making bad jokes that somehow people laugh at anyway and generally being a bit silly. I also hope that I am good at tending bar, as I love to try new drink recipes, tweaking them to my personal preferences or even creating something completely new. Most people seem to enjoy my concoctions (or at least they come back for the free booze week after week...) and as a bonus, serving alcohol helps my jokes be more successful!

I'm looking for someone around age 21-35 who is interested in being a part of my life. You will need to get to know my wife and kids and be comfortable around them. I want someone who wants to go out and do things (hiking, walks, driving with me, maybe) as well as stay home and snuggle up - watching a movie or playing games. I am not expecting someone to like my wife and I equally, but you do need to be able to be friends with her as I want to be able to do things together. I would prefer you consider the idea of occasionally letting her join us in bed as well, but that's certainly something we can discuss.

Ideally, I would prefer you are looking to eventually move in, as we own our house (thus aren't going anywhere for a while) and have a spare room - we're also getting a king-sized bed for Christmas (hint, hint). In addition to a well-established, loving home with the physical things that entails, we understand that you'll probably have your own life and your own pursuits. I'm okay with the fact that you may still be interested in other partners, as long as you're honest and respectful about it. We're not hiding our poly relationships, but we also haven't told everyone we know about it at this point.

I've got an OKCupid account (MBM_NB) which has pictures and way too much information about me. Additional pictures or answers are just an message or post away - don't hesitate to ask!

Small print: I have no interest in swinging but am open to something more casual than a long-term, live-in relationship. Long-distance is fine, as long as you realize we can't move. We'd prefer not to add any more pets and kids, but are willing to talk about. We also have a smoke-free, drug-free home.


Well-known member
This is a very nice post - I hope that you find what you are seeking!



Thank you! (=

I've actually put a lot of thought and effort (and time talking with my wife) into our decision to open up our marriage. It's just a matter of figuring out what to do now! I was never very good at dating when I was single~


Shameless bump. (=

See, I stick around *grin*


Active member
I am an engineer, and very scientific about the way I approach things

I wish the gear heads I went to school with understood the word "scientific" let alone approached their work with it...

You sound like you really have things together, and have realistic expectations about adding someone to your life. Good luck!


*bump* I'm still here. I've added some new pictures to my OKC account, and would like to add that I would also be very interested in finding someone who wants to talk as well. While I am open about my relationship status, I don't have a lot of people I can talk to about it, and I do not really know anyone personally who is poly. I'd love to hear from anyone, whether or not you see relationship potential.



I'm still around - hope everyone had a good holiday. ( =

We got our bed and I built a platform for it - I even built a faux fireplace with a bookshelf to go across the room from it, so it was a busy "break".

Well, still looking for a girlfriend, or a friend, or whatever. ( =

Drop me a line, I'd love to have someone new to talk to.


Now With 83% More New Jersey

Holy necro-bump, batman!

It's been a few years, I've moved ~150 miles (to Philly suburb in NJ) and have a great new house.... I just got drawn back onto this site and figured I'd pop this up to the top again.

More than anything at the moment, I'm looking for people to talk to. There's still an opening in our relationship (we've had a few people in our life since I posted this originally) so that's there, but honestly with all the other things I have going for me, I'd love to have more friends that I can be open to about my relationship and other parts of my life I generally keep private from those new neighbors and co-workers I've met since I moved.

Would love to hear from someone. (=


- Ben


Staff member
Those kids mustn't be quite so young anymore!


Yeah... I guess a couple things have changed in the last 9 years... I shouldn't have been quite so lazy. I'll put a few more details on the other thread though, since I mostly just wanted to show the history here, but not confuse into thinking it's an active thread.

So... more info here: