Hi there, I'm still too chickin to actually TRY polyamory although my husband and I have agreed to it and discussed it at length. No one's tried to actually enact anything yet, though. We have a unique situation in that we had a child together but had broken up beforehand. After she was born, there was a great, epic misunderstanding on the part of both of us and we spent 14 years separated and not talking. We got back together and eventually after a few years together, got married and now we are where we are now. (married two years, right before our second anniversary, husband asked to become polyamorous before I was ready ) We're both bisexual and VERY adventurous. My personal reaction to his wanting to open our relationship (insecurity, fear, deep depression) shocked even me as I'd thought I was all Ok and cool with it. Now I've come to some realizations that there are people I'd be interested in, so have really come full circle and I know this is all OK. I think. It would have been nice if he hadn't picked someone 1,000,000 times better looking than me for all this, but he did, it happened that way and there's really nothing I can do about that.
Hi, I'm James, a 24 year old transguy from Brisbane, Australia. I'm not currently in any kind of relationship and have only just discovered the world of polyamory. I'm pansexual, and have always felt like I would function better in a poly arrangement (although until just recently I couldn't put a name to it). As I'm still unsure of what I want, I'm just doing a lot of reading but I'm looking forward to learning how to navigate multiple relationships (while still respecting the needs and boundaries of everyone involved) so that they complement each other.
My nick is Natysh and i'm 21 from Italy.
I consider my self as a pansexual-transgender-polycurious-femalebody person.
Too many things? That's how I perceive my fluid identity.
I'm a student and i am attending the design class at university.
I really like travelling, meet open-minded people and -why not- fluid persons like me.
I'm new in this community, but i've always finded so much interesting this open way of relationships. Yesterday I found the name of "this open way" and now-tnx to google research-i'm here.
My name is majik (its been my name for a number of years online and in some cases RL, I have been paged in an airport by that name). I have been married for almost 13 years to a man I met online. Between us we have 4 children. All teens or almost teens. The oldest is almost out of teens. We have been poly at least in thought since we met. We are both bi. I will put more in an introduction at some later point. (Probably today)
My husband and I live in Central Texas. We are new to polyamory and were introduced to it by a man that I met online. I did not have a romantic interest in the man but the idea was interesting. I shyly brought it up to my husband and he told me that he had thought of the same thing before but was too scared to talk about it with me.
We are both researching polyarmory and looking for other poly couples or individuals near us. We'd like to talk about the beginning of a poly relationship and how it can affect a marriage.
I am 28 and he is 30. We have been married for almost two years. We have experience with an open marriage while he was stationed in Iraq for a year. We'd love to get to know other people around us or even have support on starting an alternative lifestyle.
We are one man (62) and two women (57 and 40) respectively. In addition to the poly aspect of the trio, the women also enjoy the sexual aspect of the "daddy factor" as our man is the eldest of us.
In addition to his two women, he's been friends with a woman for 25 years with whom he's been platonic because he can't stand the condition of her body. He has publicly referred to it as being too flaccid for him. Recently, in order to compete with the reality that he has two women, his old female friend became extremely sexual with him and wants him to leave the trio and become monogamous with her.
Leaving the trio is an impossibility for him because the two women in his trio, quench his sexual drive in ways that no one woman can. The 57 year old for instance, is a woman he's still deeply in love with and to whom he was engaged for a year. Emotionally, he's still extremely attached to her and refers to her as his soul mate and refuses to let her go.
He enjoys the friendship he has with his old platonic friend of 25 years enough to agree to have sex with her but he doesn't love her enough to give the two women up and become a monogamous man to her. More importantly, her friends and devoutly religious siblings would be horrified at the idea that their sister were to have unprotected sex with a man that already has two women.
My wife and I currently live in Oxfordshire, England, have been married for 24 years, and are both nearing 50 (still a year out!). We truly are best friends, and it's a lovely marriage. During it, we have had one or two friends join in for brief dalliances, but nothing long-term (although there was a distinct possibility of that early on, but poorly handled by yours truly, really —*young and stupid).
We've recently begun exploring the poly life, realising that we were both missing something in our relationship — her, perhaps a bit more spirituality, and me requiring maybe a bit more attention and — well, just a little something different.
My wife now has a friend whom she sees on a regular basis, and I'm working on a long-distance relationship with a wonderful woman I met on-line, and whom I recently met in person for the first time in a rather idyllic setting. Her life is a bit difficult at the moment, but we work hard at supporting each other, and hope for a future that at least includes the occasional visit — if not something more.
What am I looking for here? Advice, perhaps friendship, perhaps more. We'll see. Anyway, it's nice that this board exists.
Hello my name is GhostVixen, same on Fetlife and well in most other forums that I may already be a part of. I am involved in a very open relationship with mrfnord
he and i were introduced to this forum by a good friend. Thanks MBG for this.
We have a lot of queries curiosities and much, much more.
I have been in the fetish / BDSM community for over 12 years, I got started quite young but I have found enjoyment and peace in it that there are so many out there with the same views.
I know a lot of people do not see Polyamory and open relationships or even kink and fetishes in the same light, we all have our own opinions on how it is all right and proper, that is why I am here, to learn more to understand my feelings and to experience life and all its facets and perhaps learn more about Poly even though I know some of it, but not everything.
All in all, I am glad to be here and learn and understand more and more in this wonderful world of love and relationships.
I am new here right now live in two places 4 or 5 days a week live in paradise lakes with a friend who lets me live with him to save money (free electric) most of the time i live in port richey we have an open relationship i he is a wonderful dear friend but he has other friends i am poly and i am looking to for just the right situation i did have a best friend who i thought was poly but turns out hes not really poly but so hoping someday to find someone out there that is open minded enough to share right now i am in an open realtionship with a dear friend i am just loooking for the right guy who can share me in a open realtionship with none of the game playing so few can keep the whole relationship most guys want the sex part but not the relationship part they rather push that part off on others to deal my ideal world realtioship is two guys i can depend on who treat me equaly,
and they also have they see from time to time we all know each other in an open honest trusting reationship i guess i am too polly anna in my head at least thats what my friends say i am lucky i have one guy who is open minded and he has two girls he sees from time to time just wish i could find at least one other guy who is open minded compassionate loving is there anyone out there that fits this bill because so far all i found is guys who want in my pants leaves the rest to me or my friend. that's not poly nor is it fair,
looking inn Port Richey Florida and I plan on attending the Tampa poly meeting next Sunday Kymberleea.
Hiyase.. I am new to poly in action but not in thought... My husband and I have been on a long (and rather inactive if you get my drift...) search for the elusive 'unicorn' as you folks say.. I am happy to report that they do exist so don't give up! All jokes aside, we are a very interesting triquetra... I am bi, my husband is straight, and our girlfriend is bi. We are together no matter which way you slice it. This is our first polyamorous relationship, on all counts... It's been a roller coaster but things are starting to level out. A lot of trust issues at first.. got those under control and now we are dealing with the public/secret issue... When things got started we figured this wasn't very widely accepted so we are looking for support on how do deal with this... We all love each other and don't want to cause undue stress but all want to be happy...
I'm here to learn... take notes... and ask questions... lots and lots of questions...
*edit... actually I just found out (thank you glossary) that I am pansexual... didn't know there was a word for it!
Hello, everyone. My name's Andy, and I'm in my mid-twenties (so the post doesn't age too badly. )
Since November '09 I've been in a relationship with a woman I've known and liked for years, who was one corner of a triad. I get on well enough with her husband and their girlfriend, but am only romantically involved with her. I'm living in Sheffield, and they're now in Manchester, so I only see them at weekends. I'm looking into moving into the same area (but not house) as them as soon as I can.
I think I'm settling into poly quite well, though I do have my occasional wobble, but I think that's more to do with my own insecurities than with poly itself. They've been very supportive.
At the same time, I'm also experimenting with my sexuality. Although I know I like (and prefer) women, I have found myself thinking about men on occasion. I've dabbled a little in that regard, but not enough to content myself on where I am with it.
Before the relationship I'm in, I had two long-term mono relationships with women, from which I was never single for more than a month since I was about 13. Take from that what you will.
I think that's it. Any questions/comments, feel free to message me. I'm also on LJ and Twitter as Vampire_Hermes.
Hello to everyone. I found this site in exploring polyamorous lifestyle.
I have not had this experience but find myself drawn to it.
I live in Alabama and am 50 and single for 5 years now. I work in education and womens health and often travel out of country to help provide maternal care to poor areas or disaster areas.
I am very interested in finding out more about this life and finding a group locally. I am agnostic and hope one day to move out of Alabama.
I have learned a lot so far and hope to get to know yall and learn from your stories
I'm Sylphia, I live in the US, I'm a 29-year-old bi female, and I am the "point" of a vee that includes a boyfriend of about a year (who I consider primary), and another boyfriend whom I have known for about 3 months. I have occasional physical encounters with women (though it's been awhile). I am also relatively recently divorced.
I decided to experiment with poly upon leaving my marriage (which was monogamous). Loving only one person romantically has always been difficult for me (from the time of my earliest crushes onward), and I figured that now that my marriage is over and I am more confident and know myself better than ever, why not try to indulge this leaning?
So far, both of my current partners identify as mono themselves; my primary is open to the idea of taking another girlfriend in the future if he meets someone interesting, and my other boyfriend says that the idea really isn't for him, though he's a devilish flirt
A bit about me outside of my relationships: I'm a student; I like to spend time outside, to cook, to read, occasionally to write or draw, and I enjoy music a great deal. Learning and improving myself are very important to me
My name is Nyckee. I am 21 and from Freeport, IL. I have been happily engaged in a open marriage for almost five years now. Our relationship has been open since day one. We would like to someday become a Closed Group Marriage, but have not been lucky enough to find people or a person we are willing to commit to like this. I am bisexual and am actively seeking men and woman. I joined this group in hopes of meeting others like us in the area and just to have others like us to talk to. I look forward to meeting everyone.
I’m hesitant to let too much out here, but I do want to learn while I’m here, so this is my story. I’m 28 and never been married…I’ve never been good with traditional relationships (or with LDRs, as a lot of mine end up being) so about a year ago I started investigating poly. I saw a tv show that featured author Jenny Block…at that time I was in an affair (and I think in love with) with an older married man. I was interested in making it a V but it never got there, as his family situation deteriorated (something I sincerely hope I wasn’t to fault because I never wanted that by ANY means), and was cut out/I left. Shortly after that ended (earlier this year), I met B&H, my couple now. Like I said before, I guess right now I’m the unicorn, and although (just to make myself feel better) I know they’ve slept with many other girls, they say I’m the one they want to “keep”. We’ve had an incredibly rocky road…we started as a triad, although not an honest one--B (the male) wanted to leave H (female) and be with me. At one point, both of them were out of my life completely. I had some trouble I had to work through, and once that had settled, I went back to them to complete a tattoo (B is a skin artist, H pierces). That was the time they brought up all of us seriously being together. Curiosity absolutely kills me…I want to see if I can do it, we just have some trust issues and whatnot to workout (like, it seems, everyone does). That and I really do love being around them both. Where I have the most issues at is feeling like the secondary…right now I can’t even really be seen with them other than when I’m a paying customer at their shop…so I miss out on naps and lunches and talks and stuff that’s normal and boring to them, but important for me. They insist I’m not secondary, but it’s hard not to feel like I am, especially because they can do whatever they want whenever they want. I usually see them at night for a few hours, we have sex/watch movies/snuggle down, and they leave early in the morning. Sex is also a sensitive subject…the first girl I was ever with is H and she can orgasm at the drop of a dime. It’s intimidating! And feeling my way around threesomes all the time is also intimidating…I feel like I’ve lost some of the confidence I’ve always had in bed. From what I’ve read so far, there’s little evidence of the married couple + unicorn working, so if anyone has any good links/threads for me, please PM me. I’m excited to really be considering this and to be a part of this community!
i'm a student/musician/nerd, work jobs in the sac area...been in dramatic ltrs that i'm glad to be out of, and have wondered about poly**** for a while. I notice that i seem to get along well with at least as many females as guys. i feel that i have quite good emotional awareness...however i'm quite straight and don't consider wearing perfume or conditioning my hair.
i do like women who have lots of love to give and while i think i COULD do a mfmf or mff, i think my nerd mind and for other reasons would be more relaxed with a mmf, and all this is a big guess with no multiple relationships experience.
I am straight and my relationships have all been with men. I've been married and divorced twice. The first was a long stretch of incarceration. The second went four years. Ahh, great sadness.
Haven't dated that much in the last few years (ack! dating!) but hit it off with a great guy I met in October of this year. Found out he was poly after the fact. So, here I am a 48 year old single woman new to poly. Actually used to swear it was something I would never participate in. :^)
But life changes me periodically and I am learning something new. The man I am dating is someone who is involved in another long term dating relationship (she's not happy) and who has other relationships that, while not sexual presently, have been and could reignite if opportunity presented itself. I think. This is also a distance relationship. (100 miles) He rides the train to see me or I go and pick him up as he is blind. We see each other quite a bit given the distance.
I am pagan, enjoy drum circles, swimming, writing poetry and short stories and have a killer sense of humor. I think the gods are laughing. I am a nurse.
Finally joined here after reading posts for several months. The internet (until most recently, also our therapist) has been the only place I can go for support and reassurance that my husband and I are not totally out of our minds!
I am 43 and have 6 kids (2 with my current husband). I was a devout Catholic until I read Richard Dawkins' "The God Delusion" about 4 years ago, which completely opened my mind to new ways of thinking.
My husband and I have been married for 12 years. About 5 years ago I was overwhelmed with compassion for our neighbor, who was in a loveless marriage with an emotionally abusive woman. I was her friend, but I could not stand the way she treated him. I tried to stay friends with her, thinking I could get her to love him more!
My compassion turned into a crush, and one day I looked at him and he looked back at me and I just KNEW. I was busted! I was rather horrified -- I love my husband and was in no way looking for an affair. My husband and he were also friends. Neither of us wanted to betray my husband; he is a wonderful person and a very attentive, loving, dedicated married man. I was terribly confused by this attraction.
First of all, if God was love, then why had he done this to me? Because there was no doubt in my mind or my heart that I loved my husband and my family, and also this man. When I found Dawkins' book, I began to question a lot of my old ideas about faith and love, and new paths opened up before me that I never dreamed possible.
My husband became suspicious of my feelings for our neighbor, and we struggled with it for years. There was sexual sneakiness but we never crossed the line "all the way," because I feared (knew) that I would never be able to hide it if we went there. Finally just this past October, my husband radically suggested I just explore my feelings for him, take it all the way and let it run its course! He even met with our neighbor and asked him to please go ahead and do this!
I feel like the luckiest girl alive! It has enriched my marriage and strangely enough, their friendship. My new man just finalized his divorce after a long, drawn-out hell of a marriage (loveless and SEXLESS for 4 1/2 years!) and is finally free to live a little!
I feel like I can be his transition woman while he heals from the wounds of his marriage. I can make up for some lost time, as we are loving with abandon! We laugh so much when we are "trysting," the joy is so great. My husband is trying to wrap his head around the "compersion" of it all, and while we have struggled with his jealousy and fear, he has also felt great joy for both me and his best friend, and pride in all 3 of us for having the courage to take this journey together.
So far the three of us have not been together at the same time, but we are talking about it. Both men are hetero and I don't think they have any desire or intention of exploring each other sexually. I hope they don't get weirded out. But I think if they are both just pleasuring me at the same time, I will be too much in ecstacy to notice! For now my next big fantasy is a sleep-over (kids at grandma's!), with banana pancakes in the morning