Poly-Friendly Cities

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
I have a malleable list of poly-friendly cities in the United States. Poly-friendly for purposes of this list is loosely defined as, a city with an unusually large percentage of poly inhabitants, and/or an unusually plentiful number of local poly organizations. From what I've seen/heard so far, the list is:

  • Los Angeles, California
  • San Francisco, California
  • Tampa, Florida
  • Boston, Massachusetts
  • Portland, Oregon
  • Austin, Texas
  • Seattle, Washington
So, can anyone speak for any of these cities, one way or another? Do they all belong on the list? Are there any additional cities I should add?

I've heard rumors about Columbus Ohio maybe belonging on the list. Is that true, or does that sound like just a rumor?

Also, while the list only covers the United States, I'd love to turn it into an international list. Can anyone testify about cities outside the U.S. that would also count as poly-friendly?

Regards,
Kevin T.

P.S. My apologies if this subject has already been discussed in some earlier thread. Mods, perhaps merge this with that earlier thread if that's the case? I did do tag searches for "cities" and "poly cities," and had no luck as far as that was concerned.
 

opalescent

Active member
This is just my impression - I don't have actual 'data' - but Baltimore is a pretty happening place for polys. I'm not really active in DC poly circles but I get the sense that Washington, DC also has lots of poly folks.
 
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kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Oh wow, that's ironic -- the seat of the federal government, where they forbid poly marriages (and marriage-like arrangements), and that's where a bunch of poly people live ... Who knew?

[heads off to modify list]
 

happytovee

New member
Seattle, Portland, San Fran and LA are all liberal/progressive so those make sense. Texas surprises me a bit but I haven't been there so it's just my impression. Again, just a guess but Vancouver BC wouldn't surprise me.
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Normally I would say Texas no, but

  • I know a surprising number of poly people from Austin,
  • I hear Austin is unusually liberal for being in Texas.
I suppose I'll add Vancouver, unless anyone else would say otherwise for that city?

Thanks for the input so for guys.
 

Ryan3232

New member
Kevin,

Asking from the perspective of a relatively new person to poly, what experiences/sources/data have led you to conclude that these are some of the biggest poly cities?

I am merely curious as to what information and experience (personal or anecdotal) that have led you to these conclusions.

Thanks!

Ryan
 

Ariakas

Bosun
Normally I would say Texas no, but

  • I know a surprising number of poly people from Austin,
  • I hear Austin is unusually liberal for being in Texas.
I suppose I'll add Vancouver, unless anyone else would say otherwise for that city?

Thanks for the input so for guys.

I would have mentioned it earlier, but you said US only.

Vancouver and Victoria BC are two hot beds of polyamory. Not to mention its general acceptance due to the ability for canadians not to care what happens in the bedroom.

Boston would have been my other guess, having never been there, but seeing how the media is posting reasonably positive articles about the culture.

In my travels, Dallas I suppose would have a chance. Exceptionally welcoming city. Also non-monogamy seems to be the implied norm there, if I judge based on how many offers I receive everytime I visit for work.
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Yeah, I'm definitely interested in cities outside the United States; I just meant that the U.S. was what I had so far. Will add Victoria and Dallas. (If any have aught to say against Dallas, I could change that of course.) Good to hear a second vouch for Vancouver (and Boston).

I've been alphabetizing the cities by State, but I'm thinking alphabetizing by city name would make it easier to confirm whether this or that city was on the list.

@ Ryan3232 ... my info is anecdotal; I don't think formal studies have been done to analyze the poly percentages/activity in various cities. It's all word of mouth for now.

When I first started this thread, I was basically going on two bits of information. The first was the large number of poly people I was acquainted with who lived in Seattle, Austin, and Boston. Many of those people gave personal testimony as to the sizeable amount of poly activity and poly-friendliness in their city.

The second was a quote from The Polyamorous Misanthrope:
"Where you do you live? Off the top of my head, if you live in Portland, San Francisco, Seattle, Boston, Los Angeles, or Tampa, you're in luck. All of these places have well-established polyamory communities, and I can vouch at least one or two of the people in each city are moderately sane and have been poly long enough to have grown a grain of sense."
-- Goddess of Java, http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/2009/01/19/how-do-i-meet-people/

I should add that I have fielded this subject on another poly forum and have there heard the following:
"Here in KC, I know a great many people who are poly, and most of them I didn't meet on any poly forum. I met them while doing other things. There is a largish Pagan population and a goodly number of Burners, both of which contribute to poly numbers."
-- i.am.tafl, http://polyamoryplus.com/smf/index.php/topic,10471.msg10627.html#msg10627

Assuming that all that motley guesswork lines up with reality, I can proffer the following list:

  • Austin, Texas
  • Baltimore, Maryland
  • Boston, Massachusetts
  • Dallas, Texas
  • Kansas City, Kansas/Missouri
  • Los Angeles, California
  • Portland, Oregon
  • San Francisco, California
  • Seattle, Washington
  • Tampa, Florida
  • Vancouver, B.C.
  • Victoria, B.C.
  • Washington, D.C.
A list like this could become a BFD someday, after it's been thoroughly filled in and corrected. For now it's just a start.
 
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kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Haha, I knew that city was going to get mentioned. ;)
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
10-Page Thread Review

I am working on developing a list of cities (worldwide if possible) that, generally speaking, have a high percentage of poly residents, a goodly number of local poly social/support groups, and/or otherwise constitute a friendly setting for poly life. I have no hard data to go on, and would welcome any that's available, but so far I have been developing the list based on anecdotal evidence, reasonable guesswork, and word of mouth.

Here's the list so far:

  • Amsterdam, the Netherlands
  • Austin, Texas
  • Baltimore, Maryland
  • Boston, Massachusetts
  • Dallas, Texas
  • Kansas City, Kansas/Missouri
  • Los Angeles, California
  • Portland, Oregon
  • San Francisco, California
  • Seattle, Washington
  • Tampa, Florida
  • Vancouver, B.C.
  • Victoria, B.C.
  • Washington, D.C.
For now I am alphabetizing the list by the city names (rather than, for instance, which State they're in). I can order things differently if such be the consensus.

Can you help us further develop this list? Have you any reason to believe that any of the cities listed should be removed from the list? Do you know of any cities that are not on the list that should be on the list?

Thanks everyone for your participation so far, and I look forward to further input.
Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 

Ariakas

Bosun
I would think you could get .. 5 or 6 more vouches for Victoria off this site if the people were still active. For a long while this site had a prominent BC contingent haha
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Cool guys, thanks for those confirmations. :D
 

Ryan3232

New member
Yeah, I'm definitely interested in cities outside the United States; I just meant that the U.S. was what I had so far. Will add Victoria and Dallas. (If any have aught to say against Dallas, I could change that of course.) Good to hear a second vouch for Vancouver (and Boston).

I've been alphabetizing the cities by State, but I'm thinking alphabetizing by city name would make it easier to confirm whether this or that city was on the list.

@ Ryan3232 ... my info is anecdotal; I don't think formal studies have been done to analyze the poly percentages/activity in various cities. It's all word of mouth for now.

When I first started this thread, I was basically going on two bits of information. The first was the large number of poly people I was acquainted with who lived in Seattle, Austin, and Boston. Many of those people gave personal testimony as to the sizeable amount of poly activity and poly-friendliness in their city.

The second was a quote from The Polyamorous Misanthrope:


I should add that I have fielded this subject on another poly forum and have there heard the following:


Assuming that all that motley guesswork lines up with reality, I can proffer the following list:

  • Austin, Texas
  • Baltimore, Maryland
  • Boston, Massachusetts
  • Dallas, Texas
  • Kansas City, Kansas/Missouri
  • Los Angeles, California
  • Portland, Oregon
  • San Francisco, California
  • Seattle, Washington
  • Tampa, Florida
  • Vancouver, B.C.
  • Victoria, B.C.
  • Washington, D.C.
A list like this could become a BFD someday, after it's been thoroughly filled in and corrected. For now it's just a start.


I appreciate the info, very informative. I learn something new everyday. Yes, I imagine there would not be many studies on the demographics of poly folks in cities, but I will take your word/anecdotal evidence and do some of my own exploring.
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
That sounds good. And, whatever information you may come across, I'll be interested to hear about it. So don't be a stranger, visit this thread oft! :)
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
Thanks -- that sounds good.
 
Fo sho Seattle. Not only are there a bunch of groups/meetups/events that are poly-oriented, but the general attitude is chillax towards stuff like that. Pretty much no matter what you say to folks, they just respond with "Go Hawks!" :)
 

BrigidsDaughter

New member
the suburbs of Syracuse, NY have a good number of poly peeps. We don't have meet ups as frequently because it's a large area and coordinating that many people takes practice, but we've had 20 people show up for a meet before.

Besides myself, Runic Wolf, Wendigo, Runic Wolf's girlfriend and her husband and his 2 girlfriends (who actually live further north), there is Runic Wolf's ex, her husband, her siblings, her ex, and several of our friends and acquaintances.
 
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