Positive poly representation in movies and TV?

ElyssaMorgan

New member
Hi, Newbie here!
I have a good friend who's recently starting to realise that she may be polyamorous, but she's really struggling with a lot of internalised guilt and feelings of being a 'selfish slut.' I know when I was younger and coming to terms with being a lesbian, it wasn't until I started finding good movies with lesbian characters who get happy endings (and who aren't portrayed as all the awful things I thought I was at the time) that I could really accept myself. So! I was hoping to help my friend in the same way see that she's normal and that there's absolutely nothing wrong with her.

Problem is, I'm having a really hard time actually finding anything! I was wondering if anyone has any recommendations for well portrayed, feel good happy ending poly movies. Ideally with a woman as the main POV to help with the relatability for her, but not necessary.

Thank you!
 

Spork

New member
I actually don't know of any movies that show it anywhere near like what it is, or can be from what I've seen in my poly community.

What you say though makes me want to recommend "The Ethical Slut" which is a book, not a movie. It starts by making the point that there isn't actually anything wrong with being "a slut" nor is there anything wrong with being selfish, because in a sense, really enjoying and experiencing love genuinely has a lot to do with being both greedy and generous at the same time.

I've found the book to be an easy read and very...affirming.
 

kdt26417

Official Greeter
Staff member
My favorite poly-themed movies:

  • "December Bride" (1990).
  • "A Small Circle of Friends" (1980).
  • "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" (2008).
  • "Bandits" (2001).
  • "Paint Your Wagon" (1969).
  • "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" (1969).
  • "Summer Lovers" (1982).
  • "Threesome" (1994).
  • "Three" (2010).
And "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" (1988) has a certain poly flavor, especially at the end.
 

KC43

New member
Not a poly-themed movie in the slightest, but during a recent rewatching of The Breakfast Club I realized... John Bender is poly. The scene where Claire's going through his wallet and asking why he has so many girlfriends, Bender's response is a spot-on reasoning for polyamory.
 
If your friend is a reader, I really recommend the Kushiel's Dart series. It deals really heavily into all the various forms of love.In fact, in the protagonist's country it is a religious commandment to "Love as thou wilt " The protagonist certainly does that.
 

Reverie

Active member
Not a poly-themed movie in the slightest, but during a recent rewatching of The Breakfast Club I realized... John Bender is poly. The scene where Claire's going through his wallet and asking why he has so many girlfriends, Bender's response is a spot-on reasoning for polyamory.

I just looked up the script!

We see Claire looking through Bender's wallet pictures.

CLAIRE
Are all these your girlfriends?

BENDER
Some of them...

CLAIRE
What about the others?

BENDER
Well, some I consider my girlfriends
and some...I just consider...

CLAIRE
Consider what?

BENDER
Whether or not, I wanna hang out
with them...

CLAIRE
You don't believe in just one guy,
one girl?

BENDER
Do you?

CLAIRE
Yeah...that's the way it should be.

BENDER
Well, not for me...

CLAIRE
Why not?

Bender clearly doesn't want to answer that. He acts
defensive.

BENDER
How come you got so much shit in
your purse?

CLAIRE
How come you got so many
girlfriends?

BENDER
I asked you first...

CLAIRE
(shrugs)
I dunno...I guess I never throw
anything away.

BENDER
Neither do I...

CLAIRE
Oh...

:cool:
 

ElyssaMorgan

New member
Fantastic, those are some great recs, thanks so much! (I actually watched Bandits a little earlier this evening and really enjoyed it, so I'm planning to keep that up my sleeve for the next group movie night.)

I've stuck a copy of The Ethical Slut on order because that sounds pretty perfect, and will see how many of the others I can get my hands on. Thank you for the other sources too! :D
 

Spork

New member
If your friend is a reader, I really recommend the Kushiel's Dart series. It deals really heavily into all the various forms of love.In fact, in the protagonist's country it is a religious commandment to "Love as thou wilt " The protagonist certainly does that.

The series of 9 books by Jacqueline Carey that begins with Kushiel's Dart, are among my favorite books ever written.

I LOVE THEM.

But they are also kink/BDSM recommended reading, so if that stuff isn't your cup of tea or bothers you, might not be super appropriate.

(But seriously they are fantastic books though.)

Fantastic, those are some great recs, thanks so much! (I actually watched Bandits a little earlier this evening and really enjoyed it, so I'm planning to keep that up my sleeve for the next group movie night.)

I've stuck a copy of The Ethical Slut on order because that sounds pretty perfect, and will see how many of the others I can get my hands on. Thank you for the other sources too! :D

I'm reading The Ethical Slut now, too. Well. On and off. I'm also reading some Marquis de Sade right now, and a book on art and another fiction a friend has lent me... I'm a bit scattered with books at the moment.
 
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