What you listening to Now :

Shaya

New member
90% of pop songs are about love. Polyamory has wrecked listening to music for me. Many of my favourite songs now sound childish or immature thanks to the new worldview of love that the philosophy of polyamory has instilled in me. I feel like I'm in limbo, in a monogamous relationship with both wife and I identifying as poly-minded but not wanting poly right now. Monogamy isn't us. Poly isn't us. And all these pop songs don't resonate with us.

Can't believe how much I've changed as a person in so little time.

Do pop love songs do that for all you guys? Do the majority just make you scream "co-dependency" or "unhealthy relationship model!"?
 

Achimwis

New member

Spork

Active member
90% of pop songs are about love. Polyamory has wrecked listening to music for me. Many of my favourite songs now sound childish or immature thanks to the new worldview of love that the philosophy of polyamory has instilled in me. I feel like I'm in limbo, in a monogamous relationship with both wife and I identifying as poly-minded but not wanting poly right now. Monogamy isn't us. Poly isn't us. And all these pop songs don't resonate with us.

Can't believe how much I've changed as a person in so little time.

Do pop love songs do that for all you guys? Do the majority just make you scream "co-dependency" or "unhealthy relationship model!"?

Nah, but I don't tend to listen to things that make me feel a strong dissonance...or else I accept that what that person is singing about is just one perspective on life and love.

Here, this is a love song written by a VERY polyamorous woman I know:

My friend Reecy is back from her trans-continental tour, she was gone a good 7 or 8 months, traveling with her dog, Esmerelda. She is one of my favorite girl-crushes, too.

Also, she is polyfolk, BIGTIME. Some of her music has poly themes. Her press is describing her lately as "southern fried vaudeville." I like that.

She's kinda folksy, and this song is easy on the ears. It has been a favorite of mine for a while now. Her mother sings backup vocals on it. For me, this one is something of an affirmation of how beautiful life and love are...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnWiJxt8MaE

Personally, I view the whole mono-to-poly thing as being set free from prison. It's not about what you're actually doing right now, how many partners you or your wife has...it's just about learning that you're free. If the script you were reading kinda sucked, then tear it up. Write a new one. Yes, you get to do that. We should all be able to do that. Yes, like someone who has served a long sentence and walks out into the world not sure what the fuck they're doing, it can be scary to be free. But I still think it's better.

Check out what icesong wrote in her blog: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showpost.php?p=357577&postcount=81

Blows my mind. So true.

And lately, I'm listening to this song, which my beloved introduced me to:

Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds, "In the Heat of the Moment"
https://youtu.be/4thCOmIMuVM

And it makes me think of the raw feeling of being with him and loving him. Sex during thunderstorms. But I read the lyrics, and there is nothing there that specifically excludes polyamorous love, and in fact it could be read to be ABOUT poly if one chose to apply such an interpretation. (I have no idea honestly what it's really about, but I just love it.)
 

vinsanity0

Active member
90% of pop songs are about love. Polyamory has wrecked listening to music for me. Many of my favourite songs now sound childish or immature thanks to the new worldview of love that the philosophy of polyamory has instilled in me. I feel like I'm in limbo, in a monogamous relationship with both wife and I identifying as poly-minded but not wanting poly right now. Monogamy isn't us. Poly isn't us. And all these pop songs don't resonate with us.

Can't believe how much I've changed as a person in so little time.

Do pop love songs do that for all you guys? Do the majority just make you scream "co-dependency" or "unhealthy relationship model!"?

Not really, but I treat each relationship as it's own thing. the "I love you and only you" thing doesn't resonate with me, personally, but it doesn't have to be "I love you and somebody else too".

And sometimes I just like a song for the music or clever lyrics.
 

Multitude

New member
90% of pop songs are about love. Polyamory has wrecked listening to music for me. Many of my favourite songs now sound childish or immature thanks to the new worldview of love that the philosophy of polyamory has instilled in me. I feel like I'm in limbo, in a monogamous relationship with both wife and I identifying as poly-minded but not wanting poly right now. Monogamy isn't us. Poly isn't us. And all these pop songs don't resonate with us.

Can't believe how much I've changed as a person in so little time.

Do pop love songs do that for all you guys? Do the majority just make you scream "co-dependency" or "unhealthy relationship model!"?

I would say that not only love songs, but most lyrics in general sound stupid. Just because something rhymes, doesn't make it meaningful.
 

JaneQSmythe

Well-known member
"Silence...
Music's original alternative
Root's grunge"*


*lyrics from Talkin' Seattle Grunge Rock Blues - Tom Snider

(When the boys aren't home I turn off all of the electronics except my computer - which has audio disabled. Which actually means I am listening to the dog snore as she sleeps against my leg on the couch.;))
 
Chris and Amanda are torturing me with Hair Nation on Sirius.

Sorry for my absence. I was recording with my band, which was my final recording. I've been drumming in bands for a long time and thought it was time to retire from it. I am turning 50 in August. I'll do session work occasionally if a band needs me for a recording or a few live performances, but I am done as an active full time drummer. My first band I joined in 1986 and lasted until 1991. Then I was in a band from 1991 until 2017, while also doing drums for a couple of other bands. I will still be a producer/engineer. But my days as a full time member of a band are over. It was the right decision and the band I was in from 1991 until this year knew it was coming. I still helped them in finding a new drummer and I will still work with them in the studio co-producing, mixing and mastering, because they gave me so much and pushed me as a musician. I owe them everything. They gave me everything since 1991 and I will always be in debt to them. They are like family.
 

Spork

Active member
God, Hair Nation.

I hate hair metal. Really, REALLY hate it. My ex husband was into it, to the extent that it defined his teens and young adulthood, those imprint years where you establish parts of who you are for life, generally... Yeah for him, it was spandex, hairspray, and "Girls, girls, girls" which to me is...just...awful. I can't deal with it. It's everything from the look, the high voices the men sing in, just everything about it. I'd rather listen to Beck mumble incoherent gibberish, than some pretty boy all "wow girl...you got boobies...wowza...rock n roll!" Oh just shut the fuck up already with that vapid shit.

To which my ex would argue that bands like Dio's "Rainbow" or Manowar have cool lyrics. That's as may be but I still can't deal with the sound of 'em. Just can't.

I like my metal powerful, masculine, aggressive and usually dark, when I like metal at all, which isn't really that often. In the realms of older more popular metal bands, I like some Iron Maiden, but the metal I grew up with was Metallica (up to & including the black album but no further) and Sepultura...I used to like Pantera, but they bore me now, and I've heard that Phil is some sort of white supremacist and um...no thanks. GWAR of course. Devildriver is also good.

Zen likes hair metal. *ugh* *sigh* Fortunately though he likes many other kinds of music also, and I enjoy a lot of his selections. Just...maybe not John Denver so much...lol...
 
God, Hair Nation.

I hate hair metal. Really, REALLY hate it. My ex husband was into it, to the extent that it defined his teens and young adulthood, those imprint years where you establish parts of who you are for life, generally... Yeah for him, it was spandex, hairspray, and "Girls, girls, girls" which to me is...just...awful. I can't deal with it. It's everything from the look, the high voices the men sing in, just everything about it. I'd rather listen to Beck mumble incoherent gibberish, than some pretty boy all "wow girl...you got boobies...wowza...rock n roll!" Oh just shut the fuck up already with that vapid shit.

To which my ex would argue that bands like Dio's "Rainbow" or Manowar have cool lyrics. That's as may be but I still can't deal with the sound of 'em. Just can't.

I like my metal powerful, masculine, aggressive and usually dark, when I like metal at all, which isn't really that often. In the realms of older more popular metal bands, I like some Iron Maiden, but the metal I grew up with was Metallica (up to & including the black album but no further) and Sepultura...I used to like Pantera, but they bore me now, and I've heard that Phil is some sort of white supremacist and um...no thanks. GWAR of course. Devildriver is also good.

Zen likes hair metal. *ugh* *sigh* Fortunately though he likes many other kinds of music also, and I enjoy a lot of his selections. Just...maybe not John Denver so much...lol...

I am mainly a death/black/thrash/traditional metal type of girl. Whenever they play hair metal, I groan in disgust. I just never really got into it. Some of the guys in those bands used more make up and hair spray than I do, lmao. They like extreme metal too, but when they get into a mood for hair metal, I am the one who is tortured, lol.
 

vinsanity0

Active member
God, Hair Nation.

I hate hair metal. Really, REALLY hate it. My ex husband was into it, to the extent that it defined his teens and young adulthood, those imprint years where you establish parts of who you are for life, generally... Yeah for him, it was spandex, hairspray, and "Girls, girls, girls" which to me is...just...awful. I can't deal with it. It's everything from the look, the high voices the men sing in, just everything about it. I'd rather listen to Beck mumble incoherent gibberish, than some pretty boy all "wow girl...you got boobies...wowza...rock n roll!" Oh just shut the fuck up already with that vapid shit.

To which my ex would argue that bands like Dio's "Rainbow" or Manowar have cool lyrics. That's as may be but I still can't deal with the sound of 'em. Just can't.

I like my metal powerful, masculine, aggressive and usually dark, when I like metal at all, which isn't really that often. In the realms of older more popular metal bands, I like some Iron Maiden, but the metal I grew up with was Metallica (up to & including the black album but no further) and Sepultura...I used to like Pantera, but they bore me now, and I've heard that Phil is some sort of white supremacist and um...no thanks. GWAR of course. Devildriver is also good.

Zen likes hair metal. *ugh* *sigh* Fortunately though he likes many other kinds of music also, and I enjoy a lot of his selections. Just...maybe not John Denver so much...lol...

LOL...I used to call Hair Band music "Bubblegum Metal".

Not to jump to Phil's defense, but I think he was making fun of some white supremacists and it was taken out of context. Personally, he pissed me off when he walked out with no word.

Other than Sabbath I didn't really get into metal until bands like Pantera, Sepultura, Rollins etc came along.
 

Spork

Active member
LOL...I used to call Hair Band music "Bubblegum Metal".

Not to jump to Phil's defense, but I think he was making fun of some white supremacists and it was taken out of context. Personally, he pissed me off when he walked out with no word.

Other than Sabbath I didn't really get into metal until bands like Pantera, Sepultura, Rollins etc came along.

I would ask anyone who likes that kind of metal but is not aware of any good music GWAR has made (the stage show often is assumed to be the main thing they do) to go listen to the song, "Go to Hell." That album is one of the better metal albums they have done, though opinions do vary on that score.

All I knew about the deal with Phil was that some of my pals were pissed off that GWAR booked his other band (Down? Right?) for GWARBQ a few years back, and that was the reason they gave was they thought he was a white supremacist. I didn't really get too deeply into it. Which is why if I mention that it's with loads of "I guess...?? Something about that...??" I really don't know the details. But while I can listen to a Pantera song while I'm shooting pool in the bar, and be like, "Yeah!" you just won't catch me trying to listen to a whole album on purpose anymore. They got boring to me, that's the best way I can put it.

Since this thread reminded me of them, I've had a bit of a craving for some Devildriver and I think I'm gonna listen to the song, "Clouds Over California" soon. I really like that one.
 

vinsanity0

Active member
I keep meaning to give GWAR another try after seeing you mentioning them so much. To be honest,straight up metal kind of bores me in general. I do enjoy some of the sub genres though.
 

Spork

Active member
I keep meaning to give GWAR another try after seeing you mentioning them so much. To be honest,straight up metal kind of bores me in general. I do enjoy some of the sub genres though.

I don't like trying to classify them. Everyone places them with "Shock Rock" just because...well obviously. But musically speaking, their roots and their ethics are punk, because they started as this scrummy little DIY outfit and the band Death Piggy that became GWAR once Hunter Jackson's costumes got put on, they were a punk band. A comedic, absurdist punk band that pretty much loved to pull ridiculous pranks on its audiences. The first album, recorded in a single weekend in a sketchy "studio" in New York, reflects this feeling pretty clearly. Then they spent the 90's wandering the lands of drug fueled chaos, political satire, and playing with various genres and sounds. One song might be a mockery of country, another a sort of lounge tune with a female singer, another just Brockie making weird noises. They were all over the place, until around 2001 when they decided to anchor themselves to metal and try to stay there. At that point, though, Dave Brockie still had a lot of silly in him, so he formed a side band, DBX or "Dave Brockie Experience" which in my opinion is arguably better than GWAR (depends on my mood though.) That's where all of the silly-punk energy went though, except for what is reflected in the lyrics Dave continued to write for GWAR.

I guess that's the thing, I really nerd out on them because they are a lot more than a band...they're a sort of performance art collective. There has always been a lot going on there. A deceptive amount of depth under their sophomoric and scatological surface.
 
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