Wife looking for long term boyfriend

Pip

Member
We are totally in love and have been married over 33 years I’m 55 and my wife is 56, a few years ago we played about a bit in the hotwifing scene where she had a short term relationship with one of my friends, this led to great fun nights but he moved away 5 years ago, now she has suggested that she gets a boyfriend to spark up our relationship, she wants someone to go to salsa classes with her and out to the theatre ect these as things I would never do I’m a stay at home husband, I’m really cool with it and support her desires the problem we have is actually finding her a decent man who understands her needs, it’s not just a quick one she’s after she needs romance and love,
So we go out to out local town looking for potential suitable males 🤡 most are idiots and she goes out with a single female friend from time to time and has had some make attention and she’s done a bit of online dating and again it’s always the same thing, men want a quick one with no commitment, how does she find a proper boyfriend
 
Hello Pip,

It is hard to find a man for romance and love, most men are idiots who just want a quick one. She might find one at one of her salsa classes, or at the theater. I think the key here is to build friendships first, before developing them into relationships. It takes a long time, and requires a lot of patience. Good luck, I hope your wife finds the right man for her.

Sincerely,
Kevin T.
 
We are totally in love and have been married over 33 years I’m 55 and my wife is 56, a few years ago we played about a bit in the hotwifing scene where she had a short term relationship with one of my friends, this led to great fun nights but he moved away 5 years ago, now she has suggested that she gets a boyfriend to spark up our relationship, she wants someone to go to salsa classes with her and out to the theatre ect these as things I would never do I’m a stay at home husband, I’m really cool with it and support her desires the problem we have is actually finding her a decent man who understands her needs, it’s not just a quick one she’s after she needs romance and love,
So we go out to out local town looking for potential suitable males 🤡 most are idiots and she goes out with a single female friend from time to time and has had some make attention and she’s done a bit of online dating and again it’s always the same thing, men want a quick one with no commitment, how does she find a proper boyfriend

What does she have to offer your average guy? Is she looking for other partnered men or single guys?
 
It takes a while! You just have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince. My best luck has been on Fetlife, but the good ones are few and far between. If she wants to meet a guy who's into salsa dancing and/or theater, I recommend she go to events, make a group of friends and maybe a cool guy or two will come along. But this can take years. Most guys don't understand polyamorous women and just think we are sluts out for a quick hookup, which of course couldn't be further from the truth (not that there's anything wrong with that).

I'd also recommend your wife join an IRL group for polyamorists, as well as join here, instead of you trying to do the work for her.
 
Last edited:
Hello Pip,

It is hard to find a man for romance and love, most men are idiots who just want a quick one. She might find one at one of her salsa classes, or at the theater. I think the key here is to build friendships first, before developing them into relationships. It takes a long time, and requires a lot of patience. Good luck, I hope your wife finds the right man for her.

Sincerely,
Kevin T.
yeah you are correct in what you say, there is one guy who she really likes at her work I've told her to go for it if that's what she wants, she's worried that it could effect her work status if they are found out, but if he's the right man then I say go for it, only time will tell
 
What does she have to offer your average guy? Is she looking for other partnered men or single guys?
well she has a lot to offer she is fun to be with very sexy for her age and outgoing, she would prefer a single guy to be honest and basically she would do anything for the right man, she fell madly in love about 8 years ago and she adored her boyfriend and really looked after him, at his request I was moved to the spare room and was not allowed to touch or see my wife's body but the was the rule and it worked, when she next gets a boyfriend I would like to think I will be in the spare room again, im cool with that.
 
It takes a while! You just have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince. My best luck has been on Fetlife, but the good ones are few and far between. If she wants to meet a guy who's into salsa dancing and/or theater, I recommend she go to events, make a group of friends and maybe a cool guy or two will come along. But this can take years. Most guys don't understand polyamorous women and just think we are sluts out for a quick hookup, when of course couldn't be further from the truth (not that there's anything wrong with that).

I'd also recommend your wife join an IRL group for polyamorists, as well as join here, instead of you trying to do the work for her.
I agree, it takes time and hopefully this year she can meet someone who she can fall madly in love with its happened before so why not, she feels time is running out for her so sometimes she's letting guys use her and then within weeks its all over or it ends up with no love or romance and she just getting used for sex, she deserves so much more
 
I agree, it takes time and hopefully this year she can meet someone who she can fall madly in love with its happened before so why not, she feels time is running out for her so sometimes she's letting guys use her and then within weeks its all over or it ends up with no love or romance and she just getting used for sex, she deserves so much more
I understand. But I'm here to say it's never too late. There are people out there, mature men or younger men, who appreciate a more mature woman. I split from my ex h after 30+ years of relationship/marriage and met my gf within months. I've dated quite a few men who were not just into a quick hookup, and my present bf is crazy about me and swears he's in it for keeps, and I believe him.

It helps to keep yourself fairly fit (she probably is, if she's a dancer), well-groomed, up to date fashion-wise, on top of current events, etc. Be outgoing, be interesting. I'd say keep trying, but it's OK to take a break sometimes if it gets too disappointing and you get jaded. I'd been taking a break from dating for about a year, because of meeting too many losers, but I was chatting just as friends on Fetlife with Aries for 3 years, and as soon as we were all vaxed, he and I met, and the rest is history.
 
Hi Pip,

It sounds like that guy at her work is a winner, she should go for it, one never knows how these things may turn out. I got involved with my own current partner through work.

Regards,
Kevin T.
 
Hi Pip,

It sounds like that guy at her work is a winner, she should go for it, one never knows how these things may turn out. I got involved with my own current partner through work.

Regards,
Kevin T.
Yeah your right, I think Karl would be ideal he’s 10 years younger than her single and has his own place, she is technically his line manager but I suppose they just need to be clever at work, I’ll try and encourage that relationship after the bank holiday,
 
Good idea, he really sounds like the right person for her.
 
well she has a lot to offer she is fun to be with very sexy for her age and outgoing, she would prefer a single guy to be honest and basically she would do anything for the right man, she fell madly in love about 8 years ago and she adored her boyfriend and really looked after him, at his request I was moved to the spare room and was not allowed to touch or see my wife's body but the was the rule and it worked, when she next gets a boyfriend I would like to think I will be in the spare room again, im cool with that.

So what if he wanted to be her husband instead?

This is sounding more and more like a cuckold fantasy
 
If your wife (nickname please) is Karl's supervisor, this is a BAD idea.
Her name is Dawn, she is more his line manager, I know that’s been a sticking point but they are fond of each other and have a lot in common, she fancies him and he fancies her, working I’m the same place is the only issue we see, ideally if they do get on and make something of it one of them could change jobs
 
So what if he wanted to be her husband instead?

This is sounding more and more like a cuckold fantasy
Hardly a fantasy I don’t do sex and I definitely wouldn’t class myself as a cuckold, it’s more like she can do whatever she wants and I’m comfortable with it, In 2016 she went to South America for 7 weeks with a plutonic male friend and trust me the curtain twitching was ferocious, while she was there she had a short affair with a Spanish guide and loved it, if you think I sat at home and masturbated you couldn’t be further from the truth, we both seek happiness and freedom to do what we want but to live together as a married couple like we have done over the last 30 years, we have children and grandchildren all she would like is a bit more love and romance than I can give her, finding this elusive male is becoming very difficult, and if he wanted to be her husband that would not be my call, looking at our family position I doubt Dawn would want that.
 
Hardly a fantasy. I don’t do sex and I definitely wouldn’t class myself as a cuckold. It’s more like she can do whatever she wants and I’m comfortable with it. In 2016 she went to South America for 7 weeks with a plutonic male friend and trust me, the curtain twitching was ferocious.
Curtain twitching? I had to look up that slang. You mean nosy neighbors were spying on her and her "plutonic" male friend?
While she was there she had a short affair with a Spanish guide and loved it. If you think I sat at home and masturbated, you couldn’t be further from the truth. We both seek happiness and freedom to do what we want, but to live together as a married couple, like we have done over the last 30 years. We have children and grandchildren. All she would like is a bit more love and romance than I can give her. Finding this elusive male is becoming very difficult, and if he wanted to be her husband that would not be my call. Looking at our family position, I doubt Dawn would want that.
 
Yeah correct she has had a male friend for years who comes for coffee when I’m out, it causes all sorts of gossiping, we don’t explain why should we x
 
Back
Top