Your most recent OKC messages. post em here!


New member
A recent exchange on OKC with a guy who had obviously come to my profile through lovefromgirl's:

"I'm interested in your cult, Jim.
Or do you prefer Charlie?
David maybe?
Tell me more."

Which cult would that be?

The cult in which you apparently seduce girls half your age and convince them to allow you to do the same with whoever else you want.
If that's not Koresh-esque, I don't know what is.

OK, now I understand why you think you would be interested.

Here's the secret - be respectful and polite to people. They then treat you as an individual and can grow to like you for who you really are. If you are rude, or make assumptions about them, you come off as a total jack-wad and you never get anywhere and end up frustrated and on dating sites looking for women, while insulting other guys who have had the success that you fail to have.

You're welcome.

Oh, jealousy is obviously the driving force here.
However, again - has there ever been a notorious cult, except maybe for Heaven's Gate, that didn't have sexual immorality as a catalyst?
Not that I'm judging necessarily.
Monogamy is contrived.
But the sinister undertones of your seemingly harmless philosophy are unsettling.
I can see the headline now.
Aging hipster preys on naive adolescents with Daddy issues."

OK, then I won't send the recruiters around to your place.

Have a nice life.


New member
So I found someone in my match - long way away from me, with similar tastes in a lot of things - nothing about poly in her profile, but I figure - more friends are always good, right?

I never mentioned poly in the message - I talked about our mutual dislike of vampire books, our love of photography and owning a nice camera (I have a Nikon), and closed saying that if she wanted to chat, I would like it. Friendly, certainly not a come-on. her profile said that she was looking for "New friends, long-term dating and activity partners", so my message was firmly in the "friends" category.

Here was the response:
Well, Ciel, there aren't enough polynomials to calculate that amount of times some individuals try to explain the concepts of polyamory and polygamy. I'll be sitting in Polynesia practicing polytheism and using Poly-grip asking my pet parrot, Polly, if she wants a cracker before I get involved with anyone who even remotely thinks I would be interested in such a friendship. Perhaps it's a matter of my own polymorphic failures during the evolutionary process, but I prefer to think of it more in terms of I'm not buyin' what yer sellin'.

Besides, it would never work. I shoot a Canon 1ds Mark III.

Thanks for playin.

Wow. She's going to make friends REALLY quickly with that attitude!


New member
My new favorite! ;)

"i like you sweety , hit me up" from a guy who describes himself as a "nympho not a psycho" and actually posts his number on his profile.


New member
We just started talking about music and cats and nerdy things and we really connected and it was just so awesome. I told him I'm poly and he's okay with it, although he admits he doesn't know much about it and we'd have to take it slow. Eventually I gave him my number and we've been texting back and forth and we just have so much in common and it's just been awesome. We're planning to actually meet soon and I'm so excited. I have a good feeling about this one.


Stealth Mod
My most recent one (from an 18 year-old. I'm 36):

hey there , interested in younger guys?
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----

Me: (11:08am)
Not that much younger, no.

Good luck finding someone more suitable.
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Him: (11:15am)
not even for a hookup? :)
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Me: (11:18am)
Not even for a hookup. Casual isn't my thing.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----

Him: (11:20am)
have you tried it? :)
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----

Him: (11:24am)
maybe you should have a go with me :)
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----

Me: (12:59pm)
I would rather eat glass.

You seem to be labouring under the misapprehension that persistence is somehow an admirable quality. Let me assure you it's not. By continuing to contact me after I've made my lack of interest politely clear you are demonstrating that you feel your desire for contact outweighs my desire to have nothing to do with you. By extension, you have no respect for my boundaries. Why you'd assume a woman would be at all comfortable hooking up with someone who doesn't understand a "No" unless it's applied with a sledgehammer I don't know.

I withdraw my previous "good luck", at least until you have the maturity to understand that the world doesn't revolve around you.
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----

Him: (1:19pm)
Lol, sorry i misunderstood the situation, ill leave you be, all the best!

Most of what I get are from people who know me gloating for knowing me. One was a massive list of books I guess I'm supposed to read. The only other one was:

"hey whats up? you seem like a cool guy. so you are only looking for open relationships? bummer"

Is it standard practice to tell people "bummer" when you read something in their profile you don't like?


New member
Okay, so I joined OK Cupid last week not because I'm looking, but because I wanted to be able to check out Runic Wolf's profile and a friend who is dating kept sending me links to people's pages who contacted her. I specifically put that I'm married, poly, but only looking for friendship.

Today I got these messages: "hello beautiful" and "Hi - you are very pretty. Would you chat with a married guy?" The latter from someone who is only a 10% match and is older than my parents.


New member
"Hey ----,

We noticed it's raining tonight in ----. Our statistics show that more people sign in when there is bad weather. It's the perfect time to message that special someone! "

Is OKC stalking me? o_O


New member
Does that explain the disproportionate number of members from the Pacific North-West, or from England?

(I just totally made that up, btw!)


New member
The only other one was:

"hey whats up? you seem like a cool guy. so you are only looking for open relationships? bummer"

Is it standard practice to tell people "bummer" when you read something in their profile you don't like?

You have to turn it around on them:
"Ugh, you only do monogamy?!? BUMMER!"



Staff member
Since Ginger has been so sick with Lyme, I've been kind of at loose ends and have gone back to browsing OKC a bit. One guy contacted me this week. He's 28 (that's OK, even though I am 57 I am fine with younger guys).

So, he seems like an intelligent, literate, engineer type. It's obvious he has read my profile as he comments on it and asks me questions pertaining to it. Big plus and I tell him so. We PM back and forth a few times.

Last night he asked me for my phone number so he can hear my voice. Hmmm... So I take a closer look at his profile and Q&As. His profile says he is looking for women aged 23-30, and his Q&As indicate he is not interested in dating someone who is already in an open relationship!

What to do? He's not acting like a horndog who just wants to be with an experienced older woman for hot sex. We haven't even talked about sex. So confusing.


Perhaps just ask for clarification since you read his profile? It is possible that (like many on OKC) they can end up being interested in someone outside their stated range of qualities. I've talk to a guy or two whose profile said he wasn't interested in an open relationship, but then when I talked to them about it they said they didn't care.

It also may be the case that he wasn't paying attention and it might be good to air it out just to make sure he knows.


New member
"Hey whats going on?

I'm <Name Redacted>, I just graduated from RIT with an Engineering Degree. I am looking for someone open minded and cool. This might sound different but I like women's feet and would like to give you a foot massage haha. If your cool with that we should talk more."

I kind of wanted to reply that he should try his luck on Fetlife.


New member
^ Oh for crying out loud. :eek:

But on the other hand, I still say OKC is tame compared to what I often find on some of the gay men's sites. (I surprise there!)

Today, a man almost two decades older than me asked me if he could be my "daddy".
I replied "how do you know you're not?? Let's run a test on Maury!"

Interestingly enough, he logged out quickly after that. :p