Recent content by axlfreak

Well, you hit the nail on the head here. I am totally a people pleaser. But I don't know what else to do. I don't want to push him away, especially if that just pushes him closer to her. I want to do this fully, as in, if they don't last, I want there to be no question that it was between them...

Thanks, NYCindie. I guess I do that a lot, kind of ask what's ok, when we all know everything can be ok depending on who's involved. What I really mean to ask is: what's the norm? What have people here tried and how did it work out? As for the sex in earshot, I have thought about finding...

Definitions I have some questions about definitions, and how things fit into them. As I understand it, in a triad, all three parties are romantically and sexually involved, and in a vee, two parties are each separately involved with the third. Is that correct? Second, if vees are not all...

My husband and I have been married 7 years this July and together for 5 before that. We were always exclusive and mono until this year, with poly never even entering our thoughts. As far as how we've dealt, well, it's a daily process. In our case, my husband Roger is the one who wanted to...

I just wanted to drop in really quickly and give an update. I had a very short convo with Roger. He mentioned that he knew, cognitively, that none of us were ready for any of us to have babies. However, I think, romantically and sentimentally, he still wants them right now. I used that as a...

Thank you Mohegan. And I'm really happy for you there. ^.^ This is almost verbatim what I would like to hear from Roger. But he is ready for kids right now, and he feels that at his age he doesn't have much time to lose, and Kelly is ready right now. So he thinks those things together make...

I definitely agree with the possibility of a midlife crisis. However, how does one navigate that? You can't just tell someone they're having one. Just like teenagers, if you tell them what it is, and how to get through it, it only pushes them deeper in. If it is a midlife crisis, he will come...

And for now I take my leave of you, as Roger will be home from work within the hour, and Kelly will be visiting shortly after that. And I can't post without getting all emotional. >.< I will check back on this tomorrow. ^.^ Thanks again, all.

Well, I think what I need is changing. I was going to post about what I've expected throughout our lives together. But I don't really even know that. I didn't expect polyamory, I can tell you that. ;) I think I need them to slow the F down. Even if I were to be selfish, I don't want him not...

These are certainly hard things to hear, but I thank you for saying them. Maybe I can get them both to read up on making big decisions while living NRE. 🤞 I just really really don't want something we can't take back to be the deciding factor in any of this. I don't want a pregnancy to force...

Maybe I've painted Roger a little cold. It wasn't intentional. He and I have been talking for months, even prior to Kelly in our lives, about his life. He's dealt with a lot of shit, as many do. Molestation, abandonment, lifelong lies by his family... things of that nature. As I mentioned...

Ok, addressing these one at a time. Kelly's backstory is.. complicated. She's been in a relationship with another woman (I'll call her Claire) since they were both teenagers. In this 10 years time, Kelly has had a handful of male lovers, and one you might classify as a boyfriend. She is...

I'm having a little trouble navigating the posts. :confused: I've been reading bits of Mono's journey, and appreciating his mono in a poly view point. However I was wondering about a woman in this position. Is anyone out there a mono woman in a poly relationship? I guess I need to be even...

Ty ty Thanks for the help so far. :) I didn't feel like going out, not that I'm depressed, I'm just a homebody. I did go get food that my husband doesn't like, and bought a toy for the cats. Since then I've mostly been doing some house-cleaning. Although I'm not generally a neat freak by...

Ok so let me first say I've been lurking here for a few weeks now. :o My husband and I have been together for 11 years, married for nearly 6. We have had a Mono relationship up to now, and neither of us realized we might be Poly. He and I have some interests that are quite different, as in...