Recent content by blackraven

I am finding this thread very interesting. I am the extrovert in my marriage. I need people. I like deeply getting to know people, it's very invigorating for me. It does not have to have a romantic or sexual component, but it's sweet and incredible when those things align. I still struggle with...

I agree. As a lesbian, poly lesbians are hard to find. Stereotypes come from somewhere, including women jumping into serious commited relationships "u-haul lesbians". Overlapping serial monogamy is more common with lesbians. And while bi women are welcome in other alternative groups, like...

Most of the people who posted responses seem to have fairly traditional work schedules. I'm the hinge and a shift worker, both wife and gf at SAHM's, and gf's husband works a fairly traditional schedule. He also doesn't like to plan anything in advance, needs to see what his mood is. If someone...

Haha. I'm a lesbian who occasionally dabbles on a swinger site, and I get all manner of disturbed and creepy. Sometimes single men (who clearly have absolutely no chance). I thought that was a lovely commiserating comment, not snarky. And as for those who are long distance, it doesn't have to...

I have always viewed "open" as the umbrella term covering all non-monogamy, with swinging and nsa at one end, and full on committed poly at the other, and including fb, fwb, and everything in between. So, open is a perfectly good place to start. It'd also a term that most people know, to get...

The other day PG sneaks upstairs and into my bed. It's 4 in the sfternoon, I'm working nights. My wife, kids, her kids, some other people are all downstairs and in the backyard. PG has been sent up to be my alarm clock. She snuggles up against me and whispers, "Your wife just gave me a huge welt...

Is there a point at which the spouse loses the right to enforce a veto? I mean, you can always choose to no longer be in the relationship, but I feel like there ought to be a time limit or something on a poly veto. If my wife decided she was no longer okay with us being open or poly, I would say...

At work for awhile I was nights, 12s, six days a week for about a month. To spend time with all my people, my single night off looked like this: Couple hours with kids Date with wife Quiet project around the house Drive out to girlfriends house around 3 am (her husband was also working) Climb in...

Rocket scientist and Pussy Galore were already pretty good friends before I started dating PG. It keeps things interesting. The friendship certainly suffered when PG and I were on the drama roller coaster. And I feel weirdly in the middle when something happens in their friendship (usually the...

Ooh, I think this is a great question. Sadly, my metamour experience is fairly abysmal.I love the idea of being friends. (My version of the story) Instructor was insecure and controlling. Then there was some drama. He and I met for coffee to talk about things. Terrible idea. It was made clear...

Hahaha. We are two people married with children and time and space to have sex can definitely be a challenge. We've grabbed hotels a couple times. We've van camped a few times. Sometimes we use my basement guest room, for sex at the end of a date and occasionally a sleepover. Pussy Galore still...

For me it depends on which "world" I'm in. I'm open as poly when I'm hanging out in the LGBT community (ie at the gay bars). For the rest of life it varies. Some friends know. Some suspect. Our current rule is "if they've noticed and have the balls to ask, they get the truth." I have my...

Like anytime parents do something different or crazy. Kids want to know how it affects them. Oh, and of course they are still allowed in my bed. In fact, octopus woke up Pussy Galore to yell at her for snoring...

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Rocket scientist and I were long distance the first 5 years we were together. We found that we were both much happier when we had a life wherever we were: friends, hobbies, school, whatever. When we just sat around being sad that we were apart, it was miserable.