Recent content by cagedbutterfly

I just want to go home. I feel this ache in my gut and I am forcing tears back from my eyes. I feel like I deserved this. I deserved to be cheated on. I deserved to be lied to. I deserved to be hurt and betrayed. Why? Because I made a stupid decision. Because I didn't think clearly...

I can relate to the feeling of just not knowing. And being "sucked in" Even though you know your making a choice.. you feel trapped and held there.

So, R was in China for a few weeks. I spoke to him a bit online and a few times on the phone. I admitted to him that I had looked at his phone before. He was upset. I told him I never would have if he hadn't cheated. The trust that we lost is hard to repair. Right now he is "resting" at W's...

Him coming out to his family just really isn't an option. I don't know what his huge fear is with this to be honest, if its judgement or anger.. or what. I have decided that I am going to go, even if its just for a few hours. I don't like having a relationship that is declared or not decleared...

I am open and honest with my family and friends about being poly. I have quite often told strangers about my situation simply because I don't care what they think. I've recieved acceptance, and judgement in varying degree's. I work with my partner, and have just moved to be with him and coming...

So again with me and a Christmas themed post. So on Christmas day my partners has invited me to a Christmas breakfast at his parents family home. It will only be a small gathering 5-7 people. His parents don't know we are poly, and I have met his mum twice but she knows me as a friend. She...

So that merry time is upon us, and I am one who believes its better to give than recieve. To me Christmas isn't hugely important but I am really struggling with what to get both my boyfriend, and his girlfriend. We are having issues at the moment with time sharing and such, and of course the...

Yesterday was our second attempt at a family gathering. When R and I arrived,W was just behind us. She hadn't met a lot of this part of his family, so when we arrived, I guess people assumed I was his sole partner, and they set up 2 chairs. I didn't have time to even sit down, because W arrived...

Blitzbaby3, I can totally relate. Sometimes I just think it would be easier to give up and stop fighting. My guy just left and I won't see him again for 2 weeks. Whereas W gets to spend time alone with him tonight, and then see him off at the airport tomorrow. I do feel like she always "wins"...

So, today was a better day, I guess. R came to work and had a full/productive day. He is still there at the moment. I know he goes to China for 2 weeks next Monday, so I do know that he is busy and not avoiding spending time with me. He wants to come to an information evening at a school I want...

I don't feel at all loved or wanted. I feel like when R left last night, and was angry at me for not acknowledging W's feelings, and what she was saying, that he chose her.He chose to leave me in the state I was in-- hurt, confused, angry, drunk. But then he begs me to stay? He begs me to...

So it finally happened We finally had it out. Sort of. R & W were away over the weekend. As far as I was aware, they were coming HOME on Sunday night, and going to both stay. So in the early afternoon, I started thinking of what to make for dinner. R called and said they were going to stop at...

My questions are for those in poly relationships, that live with their partner and their partner's partner. I think this more refers to people who are in V relationships, I guess? But I am open to input from everyone. 1) How did you all living together come about? 2) What is the living...

So, today is a better day. We had a rough night on Thursday. R caught up with an old friend from many years ago and had a few too many drinks. He ended up sharing quite a few things with me about his life and his past, and things are starting to make a bit more sense. He cried a lot about the...

Thank you, ChloeJane. I am really trying to be strong and know what I want, but just giving it some more time before I think about giving it all up might be what I need to do.