Recent content by ConfusedBryan

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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Thanks. I so appreciate the honesty and advice. Did not approach her last night about the big D. She was not feeling good and blah blah blah. Still need to read more and beef up my self confidence before standing my ground, but I think that is definately the path ahead of me. I wantto...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    So after giving it much thought, and starting to read a book my friend read when he went through a similar situation, called "Rebuilding, when your relationship ends", I am beginning to belive that it's time to separate/divorce. I'm not sure I have it in me to watch her go through a different...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Thanks Nycindie, I am really taking all the advice I have been given here to heart. I have talked more with my wife and through that I am coming to the conclusion that our intimate relationship is unrepairable. Been talking with two friends, one that has laid out from his perspective what he...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Thanks. But my wife does have somebody, the guy guy she had the affair with. She is still seeing him.:( I read post on here about a V relationship and I do not think I want that.
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    GalaGirl, thanks for the in-depth response! Lots to think about and digest. Not going to search for a poly counselor right now, but may consider it if I continue to struggle. I am confused with some of therms you guys are using and looked around a little to find the meanings, but came...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Interesting question: Should I let my wife see and read this post? On one hand it may show her what I'm thinking, but on the other I'm not sure how she will read into this... I already told her that I was posting to a site that was belping me.:confused:
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Boringguy you said it. Thanks. I am going into this to try to fix our felationship, not see if I like being with someone else. I hope my wife has the same goal in mind. I have read other posts on here when I searched under affair and a couple of them I could really identify with. This site...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Not a wise choice, I can agree. We do need to work on our relationship first, but she feels we need a break; wants to explore this relationship with the other guy, and wants me to see what's out there. This may not be the exactly right forum for me to be in, but seems like its not the...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    There are several things you stated which I need to clarify. Right now she needs time to figure out who she is. We have been actively talking, and have through open and honest communication, continue to work on our relationship, but have decided to explore outside of our marriage for the...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Right at this moment, she needs a break. After the affair was found out, I went over the top to try to make up for lost time. All that did was push her away. We talked and we decided that we are realy good friends, and good parents, but this other guy has made an emotional connection with her...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    "I am confused. Are you and wife still wanting to be lovers, or moving it over to companionate love and letting go of being lovers? Be more like married parenting friends? Lover needs which would now be met by other people in an open marriage only? Or you are lovers AND have other lovers? " I...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    Thanks, still feeling alone and left to my own struggle with what's going on in my head. Plus the whole going out to meet someone is nerve racking, and well, terrifying. It still is uncomfortable to know she will be going out with another man, tomorrow, while I am at home trying to not obsess...
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    Here goes. new tactic after affair

    I have been with my wife for 18 years, 11 of which are married. I have three kids, ages 8, 6, and 3. As of a month ago, I caught my wife in affair with someone she considered a good friend. When I confronted her about it, she said that our relationship had felt stagnant for a long time, and...
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