Recent content by DeepBlue

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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I don't feel the need to see a lawyer. Actually, I think I will simply agree to be represented by my husband's lawyer for the divorce. (That is possible, and rather common.) Unless we really get into a financial or custody battle. Which I am very much trying to avoid. My husband may say some...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    That's changed. He is now more willing to separate. Maybe. I am really not sure. He certainly does not want to listen to me when we are talking, the two of us, only. Maybe. He thinks that I have to change, not him. But we will see. I don't think he wants to do much. He is pretty much on...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Yes, I could and probably should have solved my stress problem all by myself. Doing exactly that: solving problems by myself (problems where I had the expectation that my husband would contribute to the solution) is something I have grown accustomed to over the years of this relationship. It is...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Thank you, Emm! And thank you, GalaGirl, I really appreciate your posts in general. You have that gift to make me see things very clearly. I will try to respond to some points later. And no, my husband and I have not filed for divorce, yet. We have tried to sort out our finances. We haven't...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Yes, sorry Shaya, I thought about this, yesterday, already. I have contacted an admin to do this, now. Didn't intend to hijack your thread like this!
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I really have no idea. I talked to my therapist about it. (I actually usually don't see her anymore. She once helped me deal with a big loss.) She says it was probably a power struggle. A close friend of mine thinks he is just insanely stubborn.
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Sure, I can give an example. Our last major fight was on how to handle the situation of two relatives visiting us. First of all, I like visitors in our home, and my does husband, too. We often host strangers (couchsurfing, hospitality club; also often more than two at a time). We like spending...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I have few true statements in the quiz... three... very low score. At first, my husband and I would never fight. We both see no point in fighting about things that many other couples fight about. A flipped toilet seat? Whatever. Cleaning the kitchen? Whatever. He wants his female friend to stay...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Salt's wife is bugging Salt about coming out about loving me in front of his parents. I can see why she is doing it. Her in-laws have never been particularly nice to her. For some reason, they don't seem to like her. They have given her a hard time before. And they are very conservative when it...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I am not a native speaker of English. I would phrase things about love a bit differently in my own language. We have a third category of "love", to make it more complex. ;) When I write about falling in love, I indeed mean having a crush on someone. But I guess, I am a bit different than, for...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I am getting tired of typing "the other man." It is three words. And the term that people in my introductory thread referred to him, "old flame," is also still two words, and I frankly just don't like it. I think of someone else when I think "old flame." I will refer to him as Salt, from now on...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    A year.... I don't know. Maybe. I have a hard time putting a date on it. The six months aren't a "and then on that day, I am going to see him!" kind of thing, either. But I don't think it will end up being an entire year. For me, it feels like it is just my nature to love more than one person...
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    I guess that's just my husband. He never does rash decisions.
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Definitely my idea. My husband could probably go on with our relationship as it has been... til death may part us? I don't know. Something like that. Are you asking what is his motivation to remain in a relationship with me despite me obviously wanting to do things that he does not want me to do?
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    DeepBlue on her path...

    Leaving for a new job would affect the relationship with my daughter and my husband/her dad, who wants to keep her close. It would not affect the new relationship at all. That is long distance, anyway. Okay, four hours less are four hours less. But overall, it doesn't change much. I wouldn't...
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