Recent content by George

Wow. I'm revisiting this just now in October, 2023. My wife and I are still together, and closer than ever. We ended up being mono, as there was, for us, clearly more gained than lost. Add to that, I have a disabling disease. But I'm persevering and very much loving life, while pushing 60.

I'm not saying there is no hope for seeing eye-to-eye on what a future poly family could look like. You say that you are confused about her nature to not (try to) connect people in her life, but your description really is vague about what the problem is that is inherent in your "confusion." Are...

When you mention that you and your husband have been a triad for three months, what precisely does that mean, not just in theory, but in practice, regarding what has actually occurred? Does it mean that you are both having sex with outside people?

All relationships are a lot of work on an ongoing basis to keep stable, trustworthy and fresh. Poly relationships are way more work. That's just the reality of poly. If this early on you are scared of losing your marriage, that is your gut speaking to you. Open relationship talks destroyed my...

Her good qualities are real, but she was not upfront and honest. Do you want to wait, hope and pray that she'll change? Disclosing that she is poly after was covert and caused you hurt.

Unicorn loves them both.. In what. ways I wonder? What does she want I'm left wondering? Does she indeed want to be much more woven into the life of the pre-existing couple Was there much if any thought as to where it might go before it started - any expectation?

Yes, Fallen Angelina. Amen to me not waiting to be treated better. That has been a key change (or my half of it) that led to my wife and me making a go at a new marriage, because we were done. And this is not the old marriage being saved. It's a new one. We aren't the same two individuals. We...

Not sure what kind of cross road is this Thanks for sharing, y'all. It really helps me feel not so alone in my challenges. For my wife, this became heart-wrenchingly hard when I dated and was ready to move on. But my ship had sailed. I had resolved to not cave in and backtrack to more...

Hello Dagferi, Thank you for sharing. At the time you became intimate with Murf, had you already been poly for a while with Butch? It sounds like you took it slow until Murf had become family. Is that accurate? Is Butch the father of the two children? Is Butch also mono? Cheers, George

In Summary: This summarizes what I've been trying to get at: My wife and I have already spent 20 years, working in a career together, buying a house, and raising kids into the teen years. She's the mom. If I had a new lover both relationships might be sexual, both might be long term but quite...

Clearly you have not let go. You wanting to be a shoulder for her to cry on is sign of this. She doesn't need you You shouldn't need her to need you

That is an interesting variation in how they dealt with the matrimonial home. They were divorced, but not poly. This is a testament to their flexibility in sharing their equity and assets.

Asymmetry meaning, in this case, that my wife and another woman, while of absolutely equal importance to me, would have much different types of relationships with me and very different roles in my life. Asymmetrical means equal but not identical. All poly relationships would have to be somewhat...

Hierarchy is not a useful word here to me, although I appreciate how it might factor in for some. For me, all poly relationship possibilities could only be some form of ASYMMETRY between the parties involved. (Everyone matters EQUALLY, of course). One question is, are there any long-term poly...

my wife's handsome ex who is divorced enticed her towards open marriage it's has led to years of pain. meanwhile he's living a life of little attachment and a rotation women for sex. I suspect he's got a deeper love attachment to my wife but doesn't want to appear responsible for being a...