Recent content by ladyintricate

  1. ladyintricate

    The Struggling Mono Thread

    Hello Wishful, I feel for your family. I was married to my husband for 12 yrs and I was happily mono for that time. My husband however seemed to struggle with that structure of relationship for the entire time we were married. He had a physical and multiple emotional affairs that I ended up...
  2. ladyintricate

    Trying to do the right thing

    I talked to my SO's and we worked it out. I could get into this more, but basically, I was freaking out due to some emotional triggers and needed some sleep. I ended up telling them I was sorry for being a spaz and we all had some snuggle time. Thanks for the help, all!
  3. ladyintricate

    Trying to do the right thing

    Hello poly people! It has been a long time since I have posted on here and my relationships have changed quite a bit. I could use some advice. I feel completely un-grounded at the moment and don't know where else to turn. So, I have been married to my husband for about 16 years now (we were...
  4. ladyintricate

    Couple-hunting in Unicornia

    Hugs! BlackUnicorn, I am so glad to hear that you are doing what you need to do to be safe and work through past scars (and recent ones...). I don't know if you remember me, but I remember you from when I was on here about a year ago. I can hear in your "voice" that you are an incredibly...
  5. ladyintricate

    Hello Again!

    Hello lovely poly and mono people! You were with me for my rocky introduction to polyamory and I have been thinking for a while now that I really need to come back and post an update. For those who do not have a clue who I am (and I don’t blame you, it has been more than a year, after all!)...
  6. ladyintricate

    The Struggling Mono Thread

    RP, what you said here really "clicked" for me in my own relationship! I have a tendency to project onto my husband my worries and expectations. I am not doing this currently with a metamour and my hubby, but I have done this in other aspects of our relationship. I am learning that I need to let...
  7. ladyintricate

    Husband of 10 years is Poly-Just Found Out

    Thanks, Thespian! You sound just like my husband in the quote above. He has told me that I was and am perfect the way I am and that was not why he fell in love with someone else. That helped me a lot in the very beginning because that was exactly what my first thoughts were: that I was...
  8. ladyintricate

    Husband of 10 years is Poly-Just Found Out

    There is a time and a place for things. Telling someone bad news when they are in another crisis or when you are at a group family function, for example, is probably not the best idea. However, I think for the vast majority of the time, telling those you care about the naked truth saves them...
  9. ladyintricate

    Husband of 10 years is Poly-Just Found Out

    I agree completely. This is something that my husband has had to face. He is also facing that he lied to himself just as much as to me.
  10. ladyintricate

    Couple-hunting in Unicornia

    Ding! Ding! DING! You are absolutely right! I think that too often people try to be what their partner wants them to be (or what they think their partner wants them to be?) and being someone other than yourself cannot ever be sustained for long. More to the point, not being YOU is depriving that...
  11. ladyintricate

    Couple-hunting in Unicornia

    I had to smile when I read this. I agree completely. I think I can see how BDSM could be great for someone else, but not so sure about myself. May I suggest, just go to your partner with the disclaimer ahead of time that it may not be for you and then experiement a little! Maybe some of it will...
  12. ladyintricate

    Penny's Blog

    Squee! Good for you Penny! That sounds super hot (HAWT)! ;) I have loved reading your blog. Just found it today and it is so nice to read a happy poly story! It is also amazing to read that hubby and I are not the only nerds around the forums! We play tabletop RPG’s (hubby is an amazing and...
  13. ladyintricate

    Husband of 10 years is Poly-Just Found Out

    It was A's boyfriend (I will call him B) who my husband had texted that day. He is also our mutual friend. That was what made the situation even more difficult the other night was that when I confronted hubby about why he deleted the text message and he gave me a vague answer, I then felt like I...
  14. ladyintricate

    The Struggling Mono Thread

    The short version of what I mean is it can be hard at times to know where my needs end and his begin, or vice versa. Long answer: My husband and I are so in tune with each other that when we are happy or sad, in pain, angry, etc. the other one is very much aware of it as well and often feeling...
  15. ladyintricate

    The Struggling Mono Thread

    Hugs LR! I can relate and I feel for you! In our relationship the roles are reversed, but because of that I feel fairly confident in saying that I am sure Macha loves you very much and in loving you he wants you to be yourself. However, as you have said, loving you and wanting things to be how...
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