Recent content by learninginTN

Thanks for the advice from everyone here. Now I guess I need to find myself a good divorce forum. Also, I am getting my girls to a counselor, and I myself am going to my own session to try to get some peace with all this. I can't imagine how long the every-other day thing will be practical...

Well, after having another seemingly endless argument about bullshit, I put my foot down and told W I was ending our open marriage. I contacted any paramours we have had, past and present, including Bob, of course, and let them know. Rather than deciding to work on our marriage, W decided she...

Welcome to the forums. I think the feelings you're encountering are perfectly natural. And I think the right thing to do is continue to talk about these feelings with your SO as openly and honestly as you know how. I think you're right to want to meet his new paramour, and I'm a little...

Wow. Tough situation for sure. So what happened after R and J met? Did they break up? Are you and R still breaking up?

Welcome to the forums. I'm sorry you're in such a difficult situation. It definitely seems you and L have different opinions about C & P. I know you mentioned the fact that you seem to have only two options: asking L to kick out C&P or leaving yourself. Have you and L considered therapy...

Firstly, welcome to the forums. Secondly, I'm sorry you felt used by that experience. That is certainly an understandable reaction. I want you to consider for a moment that perhaps he didn't do it maliciously. Perhaps he became uneasy about the idea of entering a poly relationship dynamic...

Welcome to the forums. Good luck to you as you embark on this journey. If there's any advice at all I can impart, it is to NOT let your W ignore your emotional and physical needs. The NRE is going to be tough to deal with, and you're doing the right thing in coming here for support. If...

Welcome to these forums. You seem to be well on the way to a successful triad, and coming here for advice from the wonderful veterans here is a great way to start. I'm glad you're asking these questions. It shows you've put a lot of consideration and thought into the relationship, so you...

After reading this entire thread, it makes me angry that she has treated you so poorly. She seems totally dismissive of your wants and needs. I'm not sure how you've tolerated it so long, except to say that love is a strange beast. I'm not one to talk. As many here would probably say, I've...

So your emotional affair turned into a physical affair. Very common. I think you should either 1) Cut all ties to K and never contact him again and never mention any of this to your husband, or 2) Come clean with your husband and, based on what he wants to do, work with him to mend the hurt...

Nycindie is fantastic at cutting through the emotional fog and getting to the heart of the matter. I second her thoughts on this.

Last night we pretty much avoided each other. She is still being much more civil around the girls. She did criticize me once about a bad clothing choice I made for one of our girls for school, but at least it was done once, and in a civil tone. She slept in some combination of the girls' room...

She's definitely pushing me right to my limits. In the past, she has begrudgingly backed off her demands, and at least in the little amount of time I saw her yesterday she had greatly backed off the screaming, out-of-control rage. In the past, she would have argued with me ad nauseum after that...

I'm so sorry. It seems your choice was made for you by the wife. She probably felt threatened somehow, or it's possible there were other things going on between them that caused this, but in any event, I know you'll be suffering from the loss of this relationship. Please feel free to keep...

My views are obviously tainted by my own experience of dealing with polyamory while not having sex with my spouse. And it SUCKS. Big time. We had a good sex life for 13 years or so, so our situation is very different than yours, but I still wrestle with these ideas of being displaced...