Recent content by MonoSwinger

Agreed!:) I am a little overwhelmed by the thoroughness of the responses to all of this. Thank you to everyone... I am trying hard to get some actual paid work done today (as much as I really need to do this type of emotional/mental work) so I may not get a chance to read thoroughly/respond to...

I have brought up my mistakes with him many times. He insists I did nothing wrong either. Nobody did anything wrong. It just is what it is. There are couples who are in much worse shape than we are, who go through much worse things than we have... What happened happened and there's no sense...

Both my husband and I wanted Friends with Benefits in the beginning... People we genuinely like and care for on the same level as our other friends but with some added spice on the side (I, like you, am not getting naked with someone that I don't like as a person). However, we never talked...

I couldn't agree more :)

Also - just to add that I do care very much for my lover, the other husband (that has probably gotten lost in all of that - Gala Girl hit the nail on the head with that one) but he is the one that emphasized from the get-go that his wife was his soulmate and his best friend, and that his...

I have heard these arguments before... all that jazz about polyamorists holding the "higher moral ground of love"... Except that in so many cases (as evidence, just take a look around this forum for a few minutes), these so-called love-oriented people use that "higher moral ground" as a...

Wow Gala Girl - thank you! Great insights and practical steps toward resolution. It's late, I am tired and I need to process this for awhile so I will sign off for now... but I really appreciate your thorough and compassionate answer :)

I have written and rewritten and scrapped this and started over again so many times so that it wouldn’t be so long, but I just can’t help it… sorry! If anyone is interested in reading this whole thing, I’d appreciate some perspective and insight. Shortly after entering the swinger lifestyle a...