Recent content by Rosalindsbaby

Hello dear people, Update after our big talk last night! But first of all thanks again for still giving advice and being there in the comments, it’s been helping tremendously to keep my emotions in check. As well did. talking to some close friends those past days (but as I said, none of them are...

Oh and I forgot to answer this one: So I’m 34 now, been dating Max since 27. I have had two other serious relationships before. Both lasted about four years and there was always a two year gap in between relationships. Of course I thought I knew myself as a young adult between 25 and 27, but I...

Thanks Evie, you put it right into the words of „feeling like a fraud“, haha, glad I’m not alone or going insane. Galagirl, do you do counseling or something like that professionally? Your advice is always so well structured and laid out with a lot of care and precision- the people in your life...

Dear strangers on the internet, your empathy and advice have become a guard rail through the fog of this past week. I keep rereading these posts and looking into the resources that have been shared. Not all of the conclusions about the levels of abuse are as tough as sometimes assumed here, for...

So many things I wish I‘d have answers for. Galagirl did sum it up after all: I spent the night at Max‘s place and we cuddled and agreed the conversation about the „slut shaming“ just really went badly. We need to continue to talk about stuff. Today in the morning when asked about the plans...

These intense warnings make me feel very confused and sad - are these issues really too big to work on? Would Max ever be able to lower his guards? One of Max‘s other partners, he’s with her since about 3 years, let’s call her Sue, became also a good friend of mine. Right now I wish I could talk...

I'm learning another new term here, thank you. But I'm instantly worried that this might be also the case for me towards him? I wanted to address the slut-shaming separately from the reason why Max said such things, but it didn't seem possible. Is it generally possible/okay to separate such...

One specific thing that is new in the way Max is treating me is the slut-shaming which happened. It's what confuses me the most because it seems so out of character for him. Since days it twists in my stomach but I didn't bring it up the last couple of times we have seen each other as Max was...

Thank you Tinwen and Kevin for your more "sober" opinions. And thanks to everyone who is still reading and commenting. After today I think I'm going to loose both people. I had to reject a meeting with Ron again, this time I explained that the reason is not that I don't want to see him (because...

I worry I won't survive this heartbreak though. I am so in love with this person and for the most part our relationship is very nurturing for both of us. I wish to develop healthier boundaries instead. But am I strong enough for this? Well... yes, he doesn't think he needs therapy for anything...

My stomach dropped reading your replies. I changed the title of this thread. I don’t come across an outsiders analysis of him being potentially abusive for the first time, but I keep pushing this opinion out of my head. I think it’s all too minor to be called abusive…but if you ask like this...

Thank you as well for your questions, I will have to keep reflecting on them I guess… I‘ve never heard of coercive control, so the tweet you attached is really helpful for understanding. Tbh I don’t think Max would actively or consciously want to control me… He gets very hurt and shuts me out...

Thank you for going into detail with me and sharing your thoughts over my point of view! As I only have friends who understand poly only in theory, but don’t practice it, it’s tough to get real feedback for me. I constantly feel like an asshole because I seem to underperform in terms of...

Hello dear community! I’ve been coming back to this forum as a silent reader over the years again and again - now I’ve finally made an account to kindly ask you for feedback on my current fuck up. I am in a hierarchical poly relationship with Max since seven years. I would prefer...