Recent content by schizofish

Well, Meili has decided that he wants to go ahead, so I am just waiting to get the something I need and then we can move forward. So in that sense, I am a happy bunny. But I am still feeling very blech, as it turns out Njord now isn't going to be in country tomorrow! That's right. He's...

Oh, I can't half pick them, can't I? Turns out Meili has some issues which we have been discussing this evening, and it could be they are dealbreakers. I have laid out the various options as I see them for going forward. I want to keep seeing him, but to do that, there is something I need...

I have to confess, I am loving my life at the moment! I have been chatting online with quite a few guys. No dates with any of them at the moment, and while it is fun I am not sure I really want them either - I don't think I have the time to start yet another relationship! But, I am not...

And as for Adam and Eve, what about Lilith? But before I get derailed completely - a friend of mine also has issues talking about what she likes, doesn't like, is in the mood for, etc with sex. So she has a number of index cards, on which she has written all the various kinds of things. And...

I have had lots of mickey-taking from bff, Wayland and Odette about the new guy - it seems I grin like a loon when I see that he has texted me. Yes, NRE has hit, and hit hard. And from what he says, he can't wait to see me again too. Which will be Tuesday. Can you say, looking forward to...

Njord must have noticed I was being very uncommunicative and checked in recently, even though he has family issues of his own. We got chatting again as normal and I was like, 'Yes, I have missed this, and yes, even though I don't like LDR I want to keep seeing him'.... so things going as well...

Still not feeling great. I thought I was doing better, feeling better, but it seems that although I don't seem to be hurting now, I am just feeling ...what? uninterested maybe? unconnected. I have been chatting with Wayland and Odette still, but haven't really spoken to Njord in a couple of...

Well, long break - lots to update! I haven't managed to see Njord since I last posted. He got back into the country about 3 weeks ago, but he had family to visit, then I did, then he has work commitments this weekend, and I now have study and family commitments for the three weekends after...

Very quick update... I have heard from Njord, so he does have internet where he is, although it is temperamental, and he has to share. So I will hear from him while he is away, but it will be sketchy. I can live with that.... for a bit, anyway! Got some depressing news today from Wayland...

INFJ Introvert(33%) iNtuitive(38%) Feeling(12%) Judging(56%) •You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (33%) •You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (38%) •You have slight preference of Feeling over Thinking (12%) •You have moderate preference of Judging...

I suppose technically I am a 'secondary' in my relationship with Wayland - but from the very beginning we have all known that it is a 'play' relationship, a FWB thing. None of us want it to go anywhere but where it is, lots of fun between friends. So even though I *am* a secondary, I have...

Much better today, although not completely happy. Njord flew out, and I haven't heard from him yet. I don't know whether I will hear from him either, it depends on the specifics of where he is working, which he never knows until he gets there. So, for now, I have to sit and wait and hope that...

Feeling flat So, I am feeling pretty miserable today. Part of it is to do with Loki - which will need a whole separate post of its own, once I have it all straight in my head. The other part is to do with Njord. He flies out today for work, so I can guarantee not seeing him for about 6...

I had to wait until this weekend to talk to Loki about some of this. Yes, I know, I suppose I didn't *have* to - but I don't like having conversations about complicated or emotional stuff by message, I prefer to be able to properly connect while it's going on. So anyway, back to this...

:( Writing is one of the ways I can figure out what I am thinking/feeling - it's like my mind is determined to not let me see what is making up this knotted ball of feeling-bad, but if I kind of stream-of-consciousness write then sometimes I can unpick some threads and see what is going on, and...