Recent content by suziesue

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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    Hi, BrigidsDaughter. I'm sorry I didn't reply to this sooner. I've just been trying to wrap my head around some stuff. At the time I wrote those other posts, I thought she was upset because she wanted him for herself. The alternative didn't even occur to me. (What does that say about my self...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    To clarify, the guilt was about him apologizing profusely to me for something that I didn't feel he could have done any differently. I told him it was okay, and moved on from the subject, because I didn't want him to blame himself for something that wasn't his fault. I see what you are saying...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    I managed to talk to Alan today. He was confused, saying 'Surely I did text you,' but then he checked his phone, and ended up showing me the messages on it. Basically, Bridget had been texting him, in a way that implied the messages were on my behalf, or from both of us (it's a bit hard to...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    Aww. :) That made me smile so much to read. That sounds like a very happy and comfortable situation. I think this pretty much hits the nail on the head for me. I don't think I do trust that messages would get to me unadulterated. Hmm... I can't think why I would think that. Perhaps there are...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    Okay, I'm going to try again: Dear people with experience of multiple partners, Do you find in your relationships there is inevitably a certain amount of communication that goes via other partners to get to you, or do you view this as negative, or try to avoid this? I am not looking to...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    No, that is *not* what is similar. It is nothing to do with the medium of the message; it is *not* all via text. The similarity is the thing that feels weird to me-- him communicating to her (via whatever medium) and expecting that to be relayed to me, i.e., the thing that my post was about...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    YMMV, I guess. To me saying 'Did I have that right?' when I am not in any doubt about what was agreed seems more like a passive-aggressive ploy, rather than straight talking. It doesn't seem at all relevant to me whether the messages are texts or emails or whatever. How would it be any more...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    You seem to first say that I should have made a big deal of it, and then say it shouldn't be a big deal. As I explained, this was one of several similar incidents, so it would be a pretty weird coincidence if he was repeatedly 'accidentally' contacting the wrong person, and it only happens when...
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    Three-way communication issues (from A to B via C)

    I am in a 'possible developing triad-ish situation' with Alan and Bridget, where we are all interested in each other. (For reference, my original thread explaining my situation is here.) Recently I've been feeling like sometimes the dynamics of the communications between us feel a little weird...
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    Confused! 2 exes, long distance, BDSM, sort of triad

    Thanks for replies! I certainly tend to this viewpoint at times, and it may be where I end up, but both forgetting about people and finding someone else are easier things to think (or say) than do. It's been years since I felt this good about anyone. I do want to give it a chance, if possible...
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    Confused! 2 exes, long distance, BDSM, sort of triad

    Thanks for your thoughts. I suppose because being the other side of the country, nothing will happen unless I make an effort to make it happen, and major planning has to be involved for me to even see either of these people again. I don't know what to do, so thinking about where my choices...
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    Confused! 2 exes, long distance, BDSM, sort of triad

    Hello all, I am new here. I'm a possibly-poly, definitely bisexual, and sexually submissive (BDSM) middle-aged female. Sorry for the epic post, but the emotional tangle I am in right now has deep roots. Some years ago, I had a relationship with a friend of my sister, Alan. He is a dominant. I...
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