Recent content by tmw0602

  1. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    That makes total sense. I hadn't thought of it that way. I still am bummed about it. But at least now I'm not quite as baffled. Thanks, Karen!
  2. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    Another update So my husband went out on a date with a woman he met at a party. He actually met three women, and texted back and forth with all three, but only ended up going out with one. He seemed very interested in her, but -- she is looking for a boyfriend all her own, and a relationship...
  3. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    Wow! Just read it. Thanks so much for pointing me to it. Fascinating story. I'm taking it all in.
  4. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    So much here to unpack Wow, sexyserb! I don't know how I missed this response, but now that I've read it, I need a drink and a pan of brownies! (But mostly the drink!) I definitely appreciate your straight talk! If I'm honest, nothing you said here rings terribly off base and nothing you've...
  5. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    Update: We've started. And it's officially weird. (But OK.) (Note: Somehow I missed the last two responses until just now, so forgive me for not replying!) So, one month after starting these discussions, it seems we are actually on this road -- no ifs, ands or buts about it. Last night, my...
  6. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    All good points and food for thought! For me, I know that I am not interested in simply "hooking up" for sex purposes, even with someone I'm super hot for. I'd like to have loving/caring feelings for him and him for me, and as such, some level of accountability attached to whatever it is we call...
  7. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    He's slowly coming over to the idea and seems fine about it now. But neither of us has actually acted on anything yet -- aside from me having someone I was interested in, which he knows about, but that's not going to go anywhere, so it's "safe", if you know what I mean. I don't know how he's...
  8. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    The recurring tropes are total landmines, too. As I mentioned, this is very new for my husband and me, and we haven't even acted on anything yet! But when a song comes on on the car radio that says something to the effect of, "You're my one and only! I met you and now I never want anyone else...
  9. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    I can totally see that. I have been guilty of that myself throughout my single life. A man tells me exactly what he wants and doesn't want, and I think somehow he will feel differently once he gets to know me and loves me. It was a dangerous way to think -- and led to a lot of pain. But now that...
  10. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    Where do poly people find their mates? Thank you all so much! I love how fully people invest in responses here. It's such a caring community, you can tell! As I read all of your very helpful responses, I wonder: How do poly folks find their partners? Did it happen organically for most of you...
  11. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    In addition to a few things I've read here, I think the biggest thing that gave me that initial impression is the ever-present stereotype of the married man who has a girlfriend or many girlfriends throughout his marriage, all of whom hang on for years and years in a separate relationship with...
  12. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    Escalator? Could someone explain the "escalator" concept? It sounds like it means interest in moving a relationship forward toward something more serious or deeper, but want to make sure I'm understanding the lingo. Thanks!
  13. T

    Is the poly experience different for married men vs. married women?

    Hi all, I'm very, very new to this and I've been spending a LOT of time back-reading posts on this forum and learning so much. I know experience is the best teacher, but I do better with new things when I've "done my research," so to speak, so I'm soaking up all your stories and sage advice...
  14. T

    Can this marriage be saved?

    Thanks all -- things are getting better! Thanks so much to all of you who took the time to respond to my original post some weeks back. I took a bit of a break from the forum because, after my husband's reaction, I needed to really evaluate what I wanted and what I didn't want. I'd never seen...
  15. T

    Married 10 years to amazing man. Still very much in love. He and our kids are the most important...

    Married 10 years to amazing man. Still very much in love. He and our kids are the most important thing in my life. But I'm still hoping to move him to the idea of polyamory. So far, that's not going so well. UPDATE: Getting better! He's coming along!
Back
Top