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So is not wanting her new OSO all over me also wrong? This is an *energy* thing for me. Amazingly enough, if I wanted to be rolling around in that person's energy, I'd be with them. Is me saying, "Hey, don't go directly from sexual contact with them to being sexually intimate with me," also wrong?

Fairness and equality are different things. I'm working very hard on that concept now, the implication that because I'm going to a house where there's a loved one, it's tacitly unfair that I ask her to be alone. Here's the problem. I never envisioned that she was alone... or more accurately...

So, while I spent the last two nights not sleeping, and waiting for the shoe to drop, these are the things that have been going through my head. What happened to taking things slowly, and if there's a problem, we all take time and work it out? Isn't that how things are supposed to work? What...

This makes me feel a great deal better. I don't feel so alone in my response. I've been told in other places that I'm way out of line and I'm interfering in their relationship. Somewhere out there is a long story about how the new relationship has decimated the time in mine. I'd love to...

Well, at least I'm not alone. Shockingly, my gal (non-cohabitating girlfriend of 18 months) isn't one such person. News to me, but live and learn. My primary is my male cohabitant partner of 13+ years. Somewhere out there is long reply to your edited post. I explain more and hope I can get...

Long response I am struggling to grok that my sense of immediate connectivity is actually quite different than hers, and where I wouldn't dream, like in a million years, of taking that intense energy to another partner, for her it's, at the bare minimum, a non-issue. Her, maybe. But like I...

I'm looking for some compassion. My response blindsided me, but it's so gut-deep and visceral, I don't see it changing any time soon. I've been with her for 18 months and counting. At month 17, with my support and encouragement, she added her new interest. My response to the 'double booking'...

My gal and I have been in the situation where I have a primary at home, but I was her only relationship. Knowing that sooner or later, she'd find that other person or people, I left space/time in how we interacted from the get-go. A month ago, we were pointed at someone and I encouraged my gal...