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Honestly, here's my thing. I did block Fern from everything. Once someone shows me they are unapologetically toxic, I don't have allowances anymore. The stuff with Fern blindsighted me. We had been fine and then I made that post and she messaged me, which is where that whole argument happened...

I don't know if I'm just being ignorant so forgive me. I definitely don't know everything.. but I thought it would be unethical for my wife to break up with F over this? I've always tried to preach total autonomy in relationships so I feel like a hypocrite for even feeling this way, especially...

I actually really, deeply appreciate the entirety of your comment. I'm big on autonomy and I guess I've been really caught off guard by feeling betrayed even though I ethically wouldn't have expected wife to risk her relationship with F over something that was between me and F. It's like a...

Undoubtably, my mental health is intertwining with everything, and I know addressing the polyam aspects within it aren't going to fix my problems. I've done enough DBT to have my BPD qualified as in remission, but this has opened some wounds. My need for guidance centrals around my emotional...

Hi there, Thank you so much for your well thought out response. Firstly, I want to assure you I'm confident I'm not going to hurt myself or anything. I am used to dealing with those feelings. I've done so many years' worth of DBT that I graduated the program and my BPD was considered in...

This is, by far, the worst and most conflicting turmoil in my almost 20 years of off/on polyamory. My wife and I are in our 30s, and were long distance. She's a Brit who almost exclusively spends her time online with Americans. haha. Anyway, she had this question of feelings about one of her...