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I started reading Eragon again. That journey always comforts me. Never knew why, but when I lose myself in that book, my troubles seem very far away (or maybe, even a bit clarified). Therapy was horrible today. For the first half, I babbled on, surprised at all the anger and frustration that...

Damn it I'm tired of grieving. I feel paralyzed by it and resent it. You walk around with a gaping hole in your chest all the time and it's...just awful. Everything takes 200% more effort. My emotions are driving me crazy lol. I took more steps toward moving on with things. I got more numbers...

Last night was ass clown city at my job. Lately, it seems that all the associates are being held responsible for management's mistakes and lack of communication. I know, typical corporate crap. What job doesn't have that? But it's been so acute lately, you can't help but just scratch your...

I'm watching the show "Intervention" as part of my "treatment". It's reminding me of my drug problem: Codependency. Seeing it in my face, through other families helps keep me focused. I may not have a pill in my mouth or a needle in my arm, but I do have the same problems. The show reminds me...

It really is PinkPig. Very confusing. --- I never lived life with panic attacks until now. And I hope no one around me or anyone reading this, who hasn't experienced one, ever does. If evil had an essence, this would be part of it. The worst part of it is, they tend to strike at work. Thank...

@Pinkpig - for me it doesn't. My mind is constantly racing, but that might have to do with ADHD and stuff like that. It focused my thoughts, but eh, definitely didn't empty my mind. -- Bear... Bear... Bear... He's like a mosquito in my ear that I simply cannot swat. After sending him on...

Sorry you are going through such a hard time. I hope things stabilize soon. ((((Atlantis))))

As part of my meditation, it was suggested to me to get an adult coloring book. I deal with these often and quite frankly, and am tired of seeing them. There are all kinds of them. There are dog ones, cat ones, horses ones, designs, and yes, even kink and swear word coloring books. I could...

I am happy to see that you figured that out before your marriage ended in divorce. I didn't. Ironically though I don't regret the fact that we are divorcing, but I had no idea how badly we had drifted apart until OUR explosion happened. But I wasn't willing to reconcile. And for the record...

This is exactly how I have been feeling for the past few weeks. I too am going through a divorce, so I do feel some of your pain. I cannot believe how therapeutic "the scene" has proven. Coupled with my therapy sessions, it just fulfills me. The people I've met are proving to be so kind and...

Chapter 2 Chapter 2 Feel like I've hit a turning point. So, Chapter 2 of the blog. Finally got into treatment and it's been two weeks. It is...amazing what the right medications can do. I've made some changes. I've stopped drinking a lot of soda. I'm eating nothing but home made foods in...

Bear and I separated. Will be going NC until...things are settled. His wife pulled a TERRIBLE move on him and emotionally traumatized him so badly he can hardly function. It was hell on earth watching. He can't be there for me or her, and I have no idea how things will work out between them...

If it's any consolation. I struggle a LOT with what you originally posted. Doesn't your heart just flutter when you hear his specific text tone? It's awesome and....scary at the same time. How ONE text can just make an entire day or break it. Yeesh. @FallenAngelina Dude I'm printing that post...

Anyone reading this: DON'T tell your man to go out and find another woman then bulk when he does. Because being the OTHER woman that was found in that equation - let me tell you, that's a terrible situation to set someone (and your partner) up for. It's like it's been said, you told him to...

Thank you Evie. I'm still standing. Honestly, I'm going through such a roller coaster of emotions (dizzying highs, very low lows...) and constantly changing circumstances so much, I've decided not to write about them until they more or less conclude by the end of the month. I have had A LOT of...

I issued an ultimatum to Bear. I never wanted to go that far. Ever. But this situation needs to stop. The deadline is 27 days away. I will not witness emotional abuse on some one I love and continue to be treated second. I am prepared for a break up. But am praying for the best.

I can't do this anymore. I need therapy. Badly. I know it now.

!!!!!! That's all I can say to that. I am so sorry you are going through this and wish you the best of luck! Sending prayers and good thoughts your way. What people can get involved with is alarming.

Well the first Christmas I have had without my family. No drama, no well...nothing. I had a real tough time with this yesterday. In fact, you could say I shattered over it. ...I'll even admit that it happened at work. It wasn't easy because everyone, in good faith, was asking how I was...

I thought it was about life stories anyway? And besides, how we live our daily lives corresponds to how poly fits into our lives. In other words, write away. I certainly enjoy the heck out of following it. Our lives are not all about our relationships...at least, I'm trying to move away from...