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We're not attacking you for offering a well substantiated and constructive perspective. We're attacking you for offering a poorly substantiated and dogmatically gatekeeping perspective that completely shuts down the valuable insight of many board regulars. Therefore, in the interest of staying...

I was looking forward to seeing which famous folks had come out to help normalize poly and...I have honestly never heard of any of these people...

I usually don't butt in on others' blogs, but given my overall aesthetic here I guess you can understand why I had to say something. First of all, I have been reading your stories, and I offer my sincere condolences to you for all the hardships you've been going through. I know what it's like...

This is a good point. Not to make this about me (I'm only using myself as an example because I am a man and we are talking about "men"), but when I do err on stuff like this it's usually on the side of "This information is contrary to what I have heard and would like credibly sourced proof...

Yeah, that whole "how men are" is a red flag for me too. Granted, Men are sadly sort of conditioned to that kind of thing by crappy societal norms, but there are plenty of us who push back and rise up against stuff. For my part, speaking as a man, I encourage and require good, clear...

Also, I know this is a minor point, but is "2010" a typo? Because it throws off the whole timeline.

So...all the other horridness aside (and every part of my heart goes out to you for all of it), I'm breaking my rule of not butting into folks' personal blogs in order to say... PLEASE tell me you two did the Rocket Motto as part of your party crash <3

One of the reasons I suppressed my poly nature for so long was because I didn't think it was fair for me to have multiple partners and my partners not to, and I was too insecure to think I could do that comfortably. But after being on the recieving end of extreme jealousy for just a friendship...

Which one do you reccommend, eheh?

It keeps saying I'm not "authorized to view the page", and that's happened with a number of other attatchment-style posts.

This is a very tough situation. This feels to me like an amalgamation of my last two partners: Partner 1 started as openly bi and free thinking but then turned toxically jealous, and Partner 2 started poly - she was the one who opened my eyes about it! - before suddenly becoming mono with...

You can't really control how you feel, but you can control what you do with those feelings. You decide whether you ignore the pain and accept things as they are, or whether you leave it behind and find sonething better suited to your needs, or worse actions I won't talk about because I do not...

I mean there's nothing wrong with it if you can make it work, by which I mean "all parties are equal partners and given the attention they need and deserve". But nobody should be expecting that to happen going in to poly. I would love it if it ended up that way (actually my "fantasy" is being...

I feel this illustrates my problems with the concept of gender norms. :p I mean there's nothing wring with being a specialist, but that shouldn't be the default.

I'm a bit of a packrat. I've staved off becoming a true hoarder and I do cut down on things when I do get around to cleaning, but I do collect and I do have quite a bit of things. Which means I need partners who have similar enough tendancies to understand.

Been going through something similar over the past year, and mine was exacerbated by the lack of any concrete answer as to why things happened the way they did. And perhaps my being unable to fully hide my hurt is what drove the friendship to the limbo it's in now, but the one thing I always...

Some men do. More than I'd like to admit, and there's an insidious piece of society that encourages it and that disgusts me. But not all men. Not even really most men when you get down to it. I'm not like that. I mean, I'm okay with casual sex but even if the sex is casual I want to keep the...

I'll basically second everyone here and say be patient and understanding, but also let him know that does have a soft limit. Be sensitive to his needs through this upheaval but not at the expense of your own. I would probably say something like "I understand you are going through a lot and I...

Don't get me wrong, I hate that shit too. I've been fighting against the demonization of female sexuality for as long as I recognized it was happening, which was surprisingly early (though I still had a lot to learn on praxis). But that also doesn't mean that people don't act like that...

Yes, at the end of the day, nobody can be "stolen" away, but people can put undue and unfair pressure and influence on others. Haven't we all made bad decisions or decisions we wouldn't normally make because a person we cared about put pressure on us?