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How is the "old" guy/first boyfriend doing with all the new changes? Does he have/want other relationships?

The main time Ginko and I see other people is when the other is at work, that way it doesn't cut into the time we have together so much. I'd be more apt to be bothered if she were seeing someone in the limited time we could be with each other. I guess it's different for everyone. It does get a...

When you say you have had it since college do you mean you continue to have signs of it, or simply that it was diagnosed then, as it's so normal for teenagers to get HPV and then clear it that many people are considering not even testing people that young for it (my wife studied HPV testing as...

I'm used to that being the stereotype for swingers (where it also isn't true). In my poly circle, people are often assumed to be bi until proven otherwise. Quite a few bi males, though some are straight or gay, just as some of the women are.

I'm not sure which subforum is most appropriate for this, but thought it'd be useful to share: http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2012/08/10/158464908/gonorrhea-evades-antibiotics-leaving-only-one-drug-to-treat-disease "Federal health officials announced that the sexually transmitted infection is...

Attempting a poly relationship with someone that is new at it certainly may be more challenging, and many people set rules for themselves that they'll only date people already in relationships, or people that are already used to polyamory. This gets weighed against the reality that there are...

Ginko happily skips the first date so she can save her time for something else, but likes to pop in briefly if there's a 2nd or 3rd date just to see if she likes them and vice versa. We'd want to meet anyone before things got serious to make sure we all fit well together, even though the person...

She could very well use it to support a claim that her husband is abusing her and that's why she needs a divorce and full custody, if there's no evidence of it being from an extramarital relationship. With no police reports being filed against anyone else, and no public knowledge of your wife...

Thank you :-) I consistently look forward to and enjoy your posts.

Whether or not they're single or married, my basic considerations would be: Are they supportive of the relationship I have with my wife continuing as is/growing stronger? Do they get along with my wife Ginko well enough that we can all enjoy hanging out together, along with any other partners...

I've been open to the possibility of becoming closer to multiple people, having tried it for the past year, and maybe it just needs more work and possibly different partners (other than my wife). So far I have a number of friends I'm cuddly with as a group, but few people I'd see one on one, and...

I would generally be concerned if anything started taking large swaths of Ginko's time/attention and would look for a way to be a part of it or see how to reduce/deal with the problem, just as she would if I became less available. I married someone with the clear intent that we'd be free to do...

Thank you, I agree. Right now I'm looking at new ways in which I can be happier with the current situation, or ways in which the current situation could be improved while Ginko and J remain together. She's noticed that when J is around she still treats him as a guest (despite having his own key...

I see people's pharmacy seems to be ok with it: http://www.peoplespharmacy.com/2008/06/09/coconut-oil-for-2/ I've been considering using coconut oil as lube for a while now, but hadn't been sure if there was some reason to not apply it to the vagina. When I use condoms they're non-latex...

The weekend ended up not being as easy or cheerful as I'd hoped, but it was productive in getting the three of us talking more, and left me with more hope for things. The main issue for me is that of Ginko and I having enough time/focus for each other even when J is around. All of us are working...

A little hobbit community could be nice ;-) A large earth bermed dome as a community house, surrounded by several smaller yurts. For now, my wife's bf is encouraging us to pick a bedroom in his house to make our own so we'll be more comfortable spending a couple days at a time there. He lives in...

While you're joking, I'll point out that there are dozens of strains of HPV. The Gardasil vaccine is for 4 of them, two of which are the high risk kind, which don't produce warts. I got the vaccine after I was 26. I had to contact multiple places before finding one that asked me to show up in...

It definitely seems more doable when everyone can be happy having most of their time be together. Tomorrow night Ginko and I will be camping with my girlfriend, Friday night Ginko will be with J at his place while I work, and then Saturday afternoon through early Sunday I'll be joining them at...

One thing I find from reading the threads on here is that polyamory is very different for everyone :-)

This reminds me of a conversation my wife had with her boyfriend J not long ago. Since J's wife decided she preferred more of a secondary dating interaction with him, and moved out, he has been trying to find a new primary, and so far has found most poly women that potentially fit his interests...