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The direct approach is often the one that gets you an answer quickest. If that doesn't feel comfortable to you, then you can talk around it. A lot depends on the nature of your friendship with the person. If you tend to chat about everything and the world in general, find some way of bringing...

Welcome to the forum and congratulations on your relationships. So many say that poly relationships are inherently unstable, so it's great to see more examples of folks that are making it work. Jealousy can definitely play a part - what work have you done (as a group) to identify what...

For us, yes, absolutely. We have become far better communicators. I am a lot happier and content being able to feel free to be poly and following the callings of my heart. We have more true quality time together. Someone who had just met us asked me today how long we had been together and...

I know I'm late to the party, but Panda, I really feel for you. One of the big foundations of poly is open and honest communication. You were not given that. We talk over and over again on this and other fora about the importance of making sure that we don't end up hurting those that we care...

Life is (and should be) about personal growth. Each person should be free to discover who they can be and grow and develop as a consequence of that. A relationship, in my opinion, should nurture that, rather than restrict it. I think that this is a quite common problem, because of fear - fear...

I agree, calling yourself a Unicorn implies a lot more than a single, bisexual female who wants a relationship with a couple. Often it adds in an *exclusive* relationship where the couple stays dominant and only is with the single girl when it suits them. They make the rules, and the single...

Since there are nearly 7,000,000,000 people on earth, and since I only get to meet a very small subset of them, I really hope that I'm not just matched to only one. Unless you believe in the magical power of Fate, I suppose....

In any relationship there are roles and responsibilities. For something to work for me those need to be flexible to allow for changes in circumstances, especially the health of the individuals, plus other things they may have going on in their lives. So I struggle with prescribed roles that...

Hi Denise, welcome to the forums. Sounds like you are having some fun discussions - how did you meet this couple? So many folks are curious about how to meet poly folk, so I like to encourage folks to share their stories. :)

nycindie, no I wasn't specifically referring to you at all. It's more the idea of folks feeling they have to hide their poly nature, as if it's some dirty secret, until it's absolutely necessary, and certainly don't share it with friends.

Good feedback, thanks - did any of the suggestions I made in my first answer resonate at all?

So I found this chart with some brands on, in case anyone else is interested: http://www.condom-sizes.org/condom-size-chart/condom-size-chart

Do you have *any* facts to back up this premise? I'm not even quite sure what you are saying - that more relationships fail in poly or not? How do you define "fail"? So I am struggling with your premise, which is probably one reason why I am struggling with the rest of this... I'm not sure...

I think that cruising swinger sites and known haunts is possibly the worst way to meet poly folk. Yes you may get a bunch of NSA sex out of it, but that isn't what most folks define as poly. It's possible that poly may come out of an NSA situation, but it's unlikely, based on what I have...

I guess for me, it's not some big, heavy thing that is stuff I have to "disclose" - I would make it a very casual part of conversation, as part of the getting to know you process. I mean, you usually know whether someone is gay, straight or bi fairly early on, right? You know if they smoke or...

I love all the euphemisms around condom size. Since I am a "non-standard" size, I can't use regular condoms. Does anyone have a link to an online resource that talks about comparisons between the sizes of the various brands of condoms? I hesitate to buy anything different any more, because I...

Based on what you have written here, I would tend to agree with you. It doesn't sound like the positive in any way outweighs the negatives that you know you are going to feel. I applaud you loudly for doing this thought process before getting in too deep - so many folks just dive in, and then...

Jaynine, thanks for this perspective - so your reason for posting here has less to do with the secrecy aspect and more to do with how to deal with the loneliness that you are feeling. I think that folks, rather than commenting exclusively on their mutually agreed-upon choice to live their...

Welcome to the forum. That must have been hard to work your way through this. I hope you can find what you seek.

Just your type - I can't for the life of me imagine why you didn't let him take you for a ride!