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Sorry sage I have to rush off out but I think your statement made a lot of sense.You nailed your fears down well. It looks like you don't have too much to worry about though. I would choose to see it that by you becoming more financially dependent on z he is fulfilling his traditional male role...

Not so good Things were going so well before but I have made a bit of a hash of things at Christmas. I have hurt OHb's feelings and my wife and I ended up having to have a talk about things on Christmas night of all times after the kids were in bed. Not a total disaster we are muddling through...

Somegeezer you got the grammar right. If you think about it it only makes sense that way. I don't know when people started saying it the other way.

hi Erin, I've posted quite a lot in a couple of mono threads in the general discussion section (sorry I am crap at links and things) But I would point you to sages blog and Redpeppers posts too. Lot of sensible stuff in there. I would say that my relationship with my wife has essentially not...

I agree with Mono that a lot of your hurt is caused by the fallout of the affair. You and Bree, and even, to a small extent, her new friend, will need to work through that. I was in a similar position to you. I made the decision to consciously forgive my wife within the first few days of our...

This coming from another mono, It can work and work good. In fact it can be better. You are not alone. Good for you for loving your wife enough to start this journey.

Christmas Finding it hard to find time to post on here as Christmas gets nearer. Coming to the end of all the extra overtime. Good things seem to be happening. Especially as my time with my wife has been very limited of late, Christmas could easily be a time of jealousies and resentments. And...

Hi Rachelina, my only red flag would be worry for you about the speed with which things are happening. Reading your first post I thought I was looking at a mono in a brand new V and was going to offer my limited experience to say it can work; now it's a possible triad, which is outside my...

Sorry to lower the tone redpepper that was a joke couldn't resist:o

I wanted to try being a sex addict once so I asked my wife for a more regular supply ;)

There is a thread about this started by Tonberry, I think. It depends on the people involved, but personally I wouldn't pursue this, Carl, if your SO is reticent. In my own case, we decided right away that out of respect for all parties we'd never discuss with the other person what we get up to...

Carl, I don't mind feel free to mention anything that clicks with you in my posts. You are right there was some deceit and betrayal at the beginning of my situation too. I was so angry and hurt I almost went insane the first few days. My wife actually ran away those two days after I found out...

I can only speak from a mono point of view- but I noticed early on that my wife has a sort of transition period when she comes home when she is a bit quiet. It sometimes lasts a couple of hours. The other guy says she is the same there when she first arrives and when she is getting ready to...

Hi carl. Gotcha about wanting to keep things on the down low. I am fairly new to this situation myself , so a lot of the things you are no doubt raw about I have been through recently. Message me privately if you like, I may be able to help out. I have found most things are just a mental...

There seems to me to be a kind of mania about homeschooling in America. I wondered why this is. This is only my own opinion but it occurs to me that different sections of the population are not integrated and don't want to be, they don't like their kids picking up "bad" ideas from mixing with...

Isn't that everybody? I just wonder who would classify themselves as "sex negative" Lol ;)

Hi Swedel, This is the same situation that my wife's other guy is in. He has always told me that he does not feel jealous of me because obviously I was here first. We have not really had a good talk about it though. When we do talk we tend to concentrate on the positive things I suppose. I...

Swimming and/or a sauna at your local leisure centre. Boardgames or playing cards Playing pool down the local pub

Confused , I am gonna take a different tack to what others are saying and say something that I have a gut feeling about on this one. I think you are with the wrong person. I don't think this man will EVER make you feel good about yourself. This does happen, we make mistakes. There are lots of...

Situation last week: facebook It seems to be taking a great effort to write today. Mainly because I think I am fed up with having to think about polyamory all the while. That's my life now I guess. Before I start I should mention that my wife friended me on facebook only because I told her...