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That's a good question... Hi honestheart, My wife is now poly , we were monogamous for 20 years, her other guy and I are both mono and don't want anyone else. For me, this relationship is the one and only, we have no back up plan, if the relationship got wrecked to the point of no return it...

Hi RP, No judgement here. I just hope that you and your chosen family are OK. You are always honest and have integrity, so you are in no way a fake anything. I have always enjoyed when you hit someone else (including me) with the honesty bat in your posts. You are a huge asset to this forum.

This forum has helped me a lot. Basically it just showed me that I should relax and see where any given situation was going before I overreacted. Although as a mono I neither advocate nor denigrate poly as a lifestyle (We are just trying to live our life) I have felt a sense of community here...

My wife is hotter now than she was at 21 I met my wife when she was only 21, and totally gorgeous. Now she is 42, she has borne 6 children but she turns me on more than ever. She is very confident in her body, and I know the things she likes me to do to make her feel irresistable. But Derby is...

Welcome Julia and Patti OK what's the Golden Rule ? :D

We are just going at our own pace. She doesn't really need any reassurance now. We get on well enough for the moment, there is no stress. If we (he and I) need to talk to each other about anything, we just phone or text.

Hi TP, That is fair to say. We have had 3 scheduled nights out with all 3 of us together; about a dozen impromptu meetings with him and me on our own. We keep saying we will get together without my wife to go for a drink and a big chat man-to-man. (My wife is resistant to that idea.) The main...

I also cook.

Last week we 3 all went out to a stand-up comedy club. My wife sat between us, and was very brave and held both our hands nearly all night in public. The love was emanating out of her for both her guys. She was practically glowing. She was also very horny when we got home. It was a great night. :D

I don't agree. The flower is both, really, or to be specific: sexual love. Love can be in many different forms, which are all OK. But if you are giving sex to everybody, then how special is it? I can see now that my analogy is not going to fit everybody. Swingers would not agree with it, for a...

Redpepper, here is how I would feel, as the mono in such a situation as you are facing. Note I am NOT trying to say this is how (your) mono thinks and feels, but it is definitely how I would think and feel. Please bear with my possibly childish analogy. You will see where it is going. Long...

Don't she write nice, though ? Bricklie, you should be writing novels for a living. Seriously, you can put words together, girl. I bet even your shopping lists are dramatic. ;)

Hi, dinged. I can only say that there are benefits. My situation at the beginning was much like yours. Not knowing much about your situation, it is hard to comment in a vacuum about what your wife is thinking/doing. Are you able to talk much without arguing? That's the way forward. This has all...

Sorry

It does go wrong for a very small minority of men. I know one of them. He had a previously unsuspected genetic thing. His body does not reabsorb some component what is produced inside, which can longer be ejaculated from the body. This gets infected, his own body defences attack it. He has had...

Hi Mothod. Well, this is obviously no longer poly, if it ever really was. I think you have been doing the right thing all long, not being pushy or trying to interfere in their relationship, but just being there to support her when she needed you. I think you both seem level headed . Just carry...

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Thanks sage. Our time split is not an issue for us and helps us in many ways (having fixed times), although I realise it would not suit everybody. I would hesitate to hold myself up as a great example, I am still working at it!! We are nowhere near the point of explaining things to anybody...

Best wishes to you dragonflysky, wherever your life leads you.

Hi Sapphire, welcome and respect.