Search results

He feels possessive, sure, I get it. Just because he feels that way doesn't oblige you to agree. You could say, "Hey, if this relationship is gonna be open, it's open for both of us. If I'm gonna do the work of supporting you in having other lovers, I'm going to need you to do the same work for...

I'm sorry you're going through this, it sounds very painful. Let me briefly recap what I just read: Your husband of 5 years is cheating on you with his ex. He would like to continue doing that, and also have your relationship be one where you are required to do all of the substantial emotional...

What does "true" love mean to you? Without knowing that definition, it's hard to know what to say. All of the reasoning in your post seems predicated on there being something called "true" love that whatever you think "polyamory" is doesn't include.

I'm tired, party people. :rolleyes: I'm tired of this heat, for one thing. Started researching northern communities yesterday—I doubt I want to move out to the boondocks lock, stock, and barrel*, but I could see renting a place up somewhere for the hottest part of the summer. Seems I really...

I want to repeat this. You asked "is there something wrong with me?" Dear lord, no! When you said "when it came to be my turn, I had to be eating my girlfriend out while my boyfriend had sex with me", my fucking skin tried to crawl right off my body. There is nothing wrong with you. Most people...

I'm missing an important piece of context here. Are OP and their partner in a polyamorous relationship? If so, why the eff would they have to rely on pity? The whole point for OP's partner is presumably to maintain both relationships. 🤔

This is a good definition. One thing required for "sentience" as we usually mean the word is some appearance of self-awareness and probably also self-motivation, which existing programs like chatbots lack; they don't appear to "perceive" anything other than their input, nor so they take any...

I mean, what is real? How do you define 'real'? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain. ...Now, the question for you is: was that a thoughtful response by a human being, or...

If peeps don't mind me resurrecting this discussion... What fascinates me is how easily we humans anthropomorphize—attribute human characteristics to things which aren't human. Right now, I am typing natural language into a textbox (by "natural language" I mean language structured the way we...

I just dug this thread back up for another read, and salute your Star Trek: TNG deep cut. :sneaky:

I'm not sure I'm technically allowed to post in this section since I'm not a cishet couple looking for a "third", but :sneaky: Any other Vancouverites hang around here? I'm mostly looking to make friends with more poly people, though dating is always an eventual goal. Say hi! 👋

Bachelor weekend? Beers in the hot tub? :cool:

I appreciate this statement. I got some real "There must be something wrong with you, what could it be?" vibes from the "Are you on the spectrum?" remark, even if that's not what was intended. Just let us not try to diagnose each other over the internet, yeah?

Had a nice first date on Tuesday. My expectations were low, but we hit it off quite well. She's just let me know she's focusing on a new relationship with someone else right now, though. Perhaps in the future we'll reconnect! I told a friend of mine I had this date, but in general was going to...

I forgot entirely when I saw replies to this thread that I was the one that started it. 😂 Glad it's useful.

I want to gently push back on the degree you're beating yourself up in these posts. I think if you need sex to feel connected with someone, that is a perfectly ok way to be; it isn't "internalized monogamy programming", it is merely how you happen to experience intimacy. The thing where...

Bless you for this. 😂

Oh, I have thoughts on this. I could expand on all of these, but I think for now I'll go bullet points and see what discussion results. Communication related: A willingness and ability to engage in constructive conflict. The ability to "hold space" for another person's feelings without trying...

Been thinking about this situation further. Yes, and: what I've found alongside the emotions settling down is an ability to untangle the various desires underlying the emotions. For example, I miss the physical intimacy of the relationship. But that's only partly about Maple; I miss her as...

I will say one thing that makes me sad is how many poly groups seem to be on Facebook. It is non-trivial to interact with such groups without all your connections seeing it, and I have no desire to inform, like, my mom that I'm pursuing polyamory via Zuckerberg. Could we at least get on Discord...