Search results

Ditto. Although, I do believe there is something to be said about maintaining a Flirtatious Mindfulness in everyday life. That is, I need to work on pulling myself out of whatever it is that I am focused on and seize upon Opportunities for Flirtatious Behavior. I really suck at it. But...

My apologies for the sloppy language. I take those emotions as a given. Surak hasn't made his appearance yet. :) For clarification, I am speaking to the "I'm interested in possibly making this person a part of my life" emotions. Or, those emotions that motivate a person to desire more than...

Sky, the answer to your question is... "it depends". One-night stands don't fall under the poly umbrella technically speaking. It implies a random hook-up with no emotions involved, where emotional connection is one of the key components that define the polyamory concept. My impression of the...

Personally I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with a gender based fidelity agreement if that's what both parties want.

First, you need to do whatever is most likely to keep you and your child safe. My first choice would be to tell him, but I'm not in the situation, so you will need to decide how safe that is. My concern is that if he finds out later that you knew and didn't tell him, his anger will be with you...

My understanding of monogamy is that emotional fidelity is also a requirement. If people want to have relationships with veto powers, more power to them. Whatever works for them. However, my thought is that it is a short term fix, and most of the time doesn't address the underlying problem...

Very sorry to hear about your situation. In my experience, it's near to impossible to move forward into the future when you are tied to the past. In order to move on, you may have to cut all ties with them for your own emotional health. Definitely not an easy thing to do, but it may be...

I say the same argument has been made against interracial and interfaith relationships. Society didn't break down when those became accepted. The line is drawn at consent.

Very sorry to hear about what you're going through. Unfortunately, only time and talking about it are the only real way to heal the emotional pain. But, something else you can do is engage in constructive soothing activities to help distract yourself. Take up a new hobby or activity. Get...

Yes, by definition, polyamory implies an emotional as well as a physical relationship.

That, or get a pair of really dark sunglasses. The problem I had was that I kept bumping into things after dark.

Community is a very broad term. Poly community means many things to me. For example, this forum is a poly community. At its most basic level, community means "shared" to me, whether it be a shared geographic proximity, or shared belief system. Or, both.

I assume everybody's seen Franklin Veaux's Non-Monogamy Diagram. My apologies if this is a repeat.

My most basic level of commitment applies to everybody. That is, I will do what I say I will do. Now, what I say I will do for someone depends on which concentric circle of relationship closeness I have with them. My innermost circle is FAMILY. Family includes blood relatives as well as...

Really, unless she tells you what she is thinking, you really don't know. If you've asked her what she's thinking and she doesn't want to tell you, then you're kind of out of luck. From what I understand, you've gone from friends to FWB. She was ok, until you expressed deeper feelings. Not...

I'm sorry you're going through this stress. I think you should tell them. These are the risks we take when we play with loaded guns. A good scare might encourage F to take a more active role in BC. Might not, but it might.

I suggest you do a tag search "new to polyamory" or "new to poly", or if you think you're monogamous, you can also search "mono/poly" Do an online search for "polyamory jealousy". There are lots of good articles out there. And.... welcome. Don't forget to breath. Your feelings are normal...

Sheila has had two "moderate" surgeries (each 3 hours) over the last two days and John has been here helping with everything. From making dinners to washing dishes, to helping her to the bathroom, he's been a huge help. It's a huge weight off my shoulders not having to be completely...

I once had a girlfriend who equated masturbation with cheating. I think you have an uphill battle with this one. Either she isn't attracted to other people when she's in a relationship, or it is so ingrained in her that thoughts are the same as actions and that "bad" thoughts are sin. Ala...

No, that's me.... oh wait...