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Right now, between rent and the money I have to pay for physical therapy, emotional therapy, medication, and doctor's visits, there truly is absolutely no way I could swing paying another rent. I am having Issi spend the night Friday (Jon and Lora are going out that night), and I am spending the...

I believe that some insurance companies do actually have policies that allow a blood relative other than children or a spouse (parents, maybe siblings) to be included. I remember seeing something about that at a job I used to work at, when they went over the insurance options with me. There was...

If they can't moderate how many kids a person can have, how could do they do it in marriage? Also, how would you "count" the marriages? If it's a W-type situation, then three people are married to two people, and two are married to just one. So is it always counted per each individual person...

I think most questions of this kind will probably solved by looking at how we handle children and people who have multiple children.

A FFM that is somewhere between a triad and a V (they're all emotionally intimate, though not sexually intimate and have no desire to be, as the female side is a lesbian) that I know have deliberately all gotten married to each other. This was actually awhile ago - I think the marriages are...

You're not in denial. One of my most helpful books is called Too Good To Leave, Too Bad to Stay: http://www.amazon.com/Good-Leave-Stay-Step---Step/dp/0452275350/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1435591080&sr=8-1&keywords=too+bad+to+stay+too+good+to+leave It talks about the problems with adding up +s &...

So I got two texts from Lora this morning. She would rather things not be awkward for as long as possible and would like to talk so that everybody can move on. She now prefers email, because she'll feel less confronted and it'll allow her to take in what I'm saying. So that's what she wants to...

I've had all those same thoughts, PinkPig. I think the hardest thing is that I know, intellectually, that the most loving thing I could do is probably to actually leave. I've been worried for months that one of the biggest problems (and maybe one of the potential major pitfalls of polyamory) is...

Thank you all for replying. Really, it means the world to me. Jon is both not a reader of blogs, or of polyamory. Lora is the same. Their chances of finding this place (or my blog) are slim. Nonetheless, I try, as much as possible, to ask myself before I post "If they found this, would I feel...

What I actually texted: I understand that you have all you can handle with Jon recently. I respect that. I can wait until you are in a better place to talk. Given my current feelings, it would be best if we have minimal communication and stick to non-personal subjects until we can talk. I...

Yes. I agree, Kevin. And here's how today went. I asked Jon about date night this week. It's our date night week. I suggested going out Friday. Since Saturday is the 4th, and we were invited to a BBQ by a friend of his, I thought we could all do that on Saturday, and Jon and I could go out...

I don't have the energy to get into everything that happened, but this is a synopsis of the major parts and where we are now. Four major things happened. Lora decided to take yesterday off. Yesterday was the second day in over a month that Jon and I both had off (He has had off at least one -...

Still don't agree with you about how it's changing me, though I note your point about the depth that I discuss things. And that is something that I struggle with, but I worry, as someone asking for help, about what level of detail is needed to convey the seriousness of the situation, and what...

updates from another post I started, that turned into a continuation of what is going on with us: I barely got any sleep Thursday night because Lora and Jon had their date night that night, and they had the most insane blowout argument when they got home, which woke me up around 2:30 am, and...

When you say you are a pole dancer, do you mean that you pole dance just for exercise, or you're also employed as one? I did gogo dancing through college, as a way to pay the bills. Plenty of the women there were bi, a few were lesbians, and a few definitely viewed themselves as...

MightyMax, while I respect that you believe what you believe is true for yourself, I completely disagree with it for myself, and disagree with the premise that, by discussing what is going on in detail, I am doing something wrong. Were it easy to find me, Jon, or Lora, based on what I've...

We're in the middle of a bit of a break here, am I'm feeling wiped out, so I don't have too much to say at the moment, other than I don't know yet what's going to happen. But, to answer the one valid comment in MightyMax's post (thank you, Kevin & reflections, for what you said in response to...

If I were "feeding" off of the drama, then I don't think I'd have been doing things like going out with friends more, staying in the bedroom more, disengaging from Lora while I try to wait and see if therapy helps. The events that caused this post were a result of me dipping my toes back into...

Also bringing up the button thing with Lora at this point, I just realized, would be like...putting out your mailbox when your whole house is on fire and saying "whew! I saved the mailbox!". I'm in that weird foggy empty-brain feeling that comes when one has had very little sleep. I'm not...

The big deal in bringing it up is the reaction that I could be dealing with. Saying something as innocuous and reasonable as what you're suggesting (which I would - without thought - do with anybody else in my life) could turn into a giant freaking-out thing on her part. So, I feel like I...