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I tend to feel like NRE can vary in intensity over time; I was past the first mad blush of it with RacingSnail (the part where I actually had trouble sleeping and was full of pleasantly obsessive thoughts) after about a month, but I have certainly had periods of over-the-top love since then...

T-12 days and 11 hours until I see RacingSnail. He had a slight reprieve from the Intolerable Pit of Despair, and managed to send me one long email, the first since July. But now he’s back in the thick of it. House sitting for his parents when they go on vacation seems to have a negative effect...

Welcome, polyaccidental! I saw your blog post, too—sounds like you have a great situation. <3

Age: 39 Partners: 6 Breakdowns (for fun): 2 play partners, 4 serious relationship partners 3 identified female, 3 identified male 2 current, 4 past (still friends with 2; 2 acrimonious partings) I’m super sex-positive, but I guess also a bit personally shy/conservative! I definitely would never...

The beach was fun (though my brother’s GF didn’t join us after all). I’m pretty well settled in home now, and school has started up for the kiddo, so my schedule is a bit lighter. RacingSnail has been really down again this week. (ie - back in the Intolerable Pit of Despair, instead of his...

I live with MonkeyMan. Since he’s a freelancer and I’m a stay-at-home parent, we see a lot of each other (though when he’s working a lot, it’s definitely a ‘physically present, mentally absent’ thing). We keep very different hours, though. RacingSnail lives 2,000 miles away. In the course of...

Yup, MonkeyMan is indeed off on a business trip in an hour or so. We had a fantastic time taking a short road trip out to eastern Mass to visit some of his relatives yesterday. I love taking road trips with that guy. He makes my heart happy. And in other happy news, RacingSnail caught a little...

Welcome! :) My kiddo was seven when I explained my poly to her. As Kevin says, it wasn’t that much of a big deal. It is important to come out to other people first, in my opinion, because expecting kids to keep secrets is... well. I’m pretty strongly against it! Glad you found this forum; hope...

Always something new under the sun. This week it’s finding out how it feels to be entirely out of touch with RacingSnail, as he is camping at Yellowstone with his mom. This is the longest that I haven’t been in touch with him since we started dating. If MonkeyMan follows through on the business...

Solid Oak Days go by, and warm summer nights. The moon waxes and wanes. The earth turns. You tumble, And I stand fast. Against doubt, against fear, Against forgetfulness and pain, Against disconnection and sorrow, Against chaos and loneliness and the slow drift apart, Like an age-old oak...

Hi stormy! It sounds like you have a lot to process with regards to the conflict between what you want your relationships to look like and your faith. Certainly when you’re stepping outside the mainstream, you’re bound to encounter ways of thinking you may not have considered before. For...

Thanks, Lunabunny! So, this past weekend I facilitated the group discussion for our local poly community (it’s a monthly event that I’ve attended sporadically for years). I feel like this community has given me the environment I needed to slowly pick up the skills and the confidence to try...

It sounds to me like you’re thinking about the right things and watching out for the right potential problems. As to your questions... 1. It’s important to keep grounded in your ‘regular life’ as much as you can during NRE, and you can balance that out (in my experience) by deciding (with your...

Anticipating Fireworks Summer sun fades slowly; humid air presses close, smelling of hot concrete and cut grass, bug spray and charcoal and candy-sweet burning marshmallows. In the gathering night, heralded by a hazy twinkling of stars, shepherded by the beguiling blink of fireflies, the...

“How do y'all find the time for everything? Is there just a lot of doing life activities with partners? Is there a lot of kitchen table poly? Is there a lot of co-habitation? Is there just not a lot of other life activities happening?“ My schedule currently is medium-busy. I have childcare...

Hello, Sally, and welcome! Sorry to hear you weren’t finding as much community locally as you had hoped. I hope that this forum, at least, can be a great resource for you. And don’t worry, your English is great!

I don’t need to be best, first, or most. What my partners do outside of our relationship isn’t directly relevant to me. What I need to be secure is to know that what my partners offer me is heartfelt, honest, and sufficient to my needs.

A month gone by, and not much has changed, though I’m feeling rather less maudlin about it. I decided, after a lot of self-reflection, to tell RacingSnail that my offer to have him live with me was dependent on him getting some mental health treatment. He finds that idea really overwhelming, of...

I’ve never quite been in your situation—my female partners and I have all been bi- or pansexual, and oftentimes preferred our additional relationships to have some gender diversity—but it seems to me that this would be a reasonable use of parallel poly. Not a complete ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’—I...

Hey mtdrmz! I think you will find that people here have come into their non-monogamous relationships in a variety of ways. In some cases they were sexually open first, and then someone ‘caught feels’ for an additional partner. In many other cases, someone who was in a monogamous relationship...