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OP, you are confusing her Consent with her Basis or Justification for non-consent. You may find her justification for non-consent confusing. It’s not your job to understand, and it’s nobody’s job to make you understand it. Her justification is her business, not yours. The question of Consent...

I would argue that you are not receiving mixed messages at all… 1. You two were dating. 2. She propositioned you for a relationship. 3. You stated your terms. 4. She did not consent to your terms. 5. Relationship talks should now be over. The next conversation should be whether you each...

That is a fascinating read. I briefly experimented with a joint online profile with my gf Daisy a number of years ago. The number of men throwing themselves at the opportunity for a casual encounter with her was striking. The volume was such that it made the app difficult to use unless the...

It’s a shame OP decided not to return… If I were in this situation, my expectation would be centered on sincere effort and progress. What is hubby doing to manage these disruptive thoughts? e.g. CBT? Okay, is he doing the exercises every day, week, month? And if that isn’t working is he...

iMessage, sometimes. Because we all talk in person everyday there is not much to text about short of brainstorming about activities, travel, & purchases…. It’s not a very common activity and usually happens while we are all in the same room to send each other links, pictures, websites, ect…

Yes. Almost everyday, we live together. Initially, communication between partners went through me. It was a hard position for me to be in because I tend to be defensive for both of them. I encouraged my partners begin communicating with each other and they did so successfully. Now that we...

Unfortunately none of us have a crystal ball. The possibility for resentment exists, the probability of that occurring will depend on the amount of honesty and boundary control each person in the relationship can achieve. I see this as an internal conflict with your own ability to adhere to...

I am thinking you will not be able to play monkey in the middle on this one. If the friendship is to co-exist your husband and Martin will need to develop some sort of constructive dialogue about this with each other.

When I decided to cohabitate with my two partners; we decided that since Bird and I were married and my family was accustomed to our union, we would describe Daisy as a roommate. It did not take long for me to reject this idea. Even though this idea sounded plausible before we entangled, it...

Can you elaborate on what exactly he has tried so far? It may help us make recommendations if we have a better idea of what type of mental work he has already attempted.

It is unfortunate that your long term relationship ended. It sounds like you experienced a fair amount of trauma from your polyamory experiment. I hope you are able to process this and have successful relationships in the future. As a semi-regular user here I see people posting in situations...

He's not into you.

I think asking yourself (and the world) questions like this is a waste of time. You will never have the answers you seek. People treat one another badly sometimes. It likely comes down to lack of respect, personal traumas, and maturity. The problem with people is we are so immersed in denial...

If this is an interpretation it feels to me like a coping strategy rooted in condescension. If this statement is fact it sounds like It could be the making of an unhealthy dynamic.

I’d like to make it clear that I do not endorse this… ☺️

It hasn’t… Evie literally keeps her location set to ANTARCTICA… Imagine that… OP lives in Indianapolis, USA. And only agreed to poly in order to “save the marriage” (per his post in another thread). Evie’s referenced partner (from the kink site) lives half a world away…. I’m not saying there...

I don’t know if your being controlling. I don’t like the phrasing of those sorts of questions because everyone will have a different threshold for something like that. Your partner is violating agreements. You want to pump the breaks on the whole thing, and for what purpose? Until you...

I agree with the sentiment that polyamory is not a "need". When I think about defining "need" I go into a spiral of thought so defining it in terms of "wants" makes a lot more sense to me. Polyamory is basically the result of my love for sexual variety... When I was young I resented the...

You are not expecting too much from polyamory. The whole point is to receive affection from multiple partners… I think to understand the dating world you have to generalize a bit, because modern dating is a numbers game. Generally speaking hetero women have the benefit of dipping into the...

These are difficult questions that I think can only be answered by your partner. We all have our own tolerance for privacy. In my relationships, if I were expected to share every time I flirted with someone on Tinder I would find that overbearing… Dating can be stressful, and providing a daily...