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I saw both my cancer dr and my regular dr last week. I also got an eye exam and had STD labs done. Ordered new glasses and frames (some so cute cats eye frames!) and my STDs all came out negative. No news on any of this is GREAT news. Happy for you.

My point was the " old marriage " the way things were was then and this is now. Very hard to unring bells if that even if that were remotely possible. It's actually a bit more than getting use to new information. I'd reread this from DH again. It's actually a bit more than getting use to...

Agree with Dagfari. The problem you have Claire is if Castles wife moves to your location, one would assume unless she is totally on board with you spending this much alone time with him that your alone time will be measured and unless it is DADT when she moves there, she is going to have some...

Magdyln Congrats on your new potential boyfriend. Glad for you. LOL. Don't get me wrong. I liked my lovers, most of them were much younger in their 30's, but yeah I did not do the "love" thing. Closest to that mistake would be my airline pilot and thank heavens that was a LDR basically with...

Hi Shaya, Thank you for your thoughts. There is no hole in my husbands heart. Just detachment. He is mad, not at me, but at himself, for not saying "No Way", a third time. He does not point the finger at anyone but himself. And he has no fear of being alone or without me, I asked him that and...

Jane I read your post. I do feel the stress because I know how close I was or am to having the worst thing happen. I fear that Hero will ask more detailed questions and i am scared to death of what the reaction will be if he knows the extent o the things I have done. yes, he knows i was with...

I feel the need to highlight a few gems of wisdom -- Quote: Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post non-monogamy and mono/poly is not necessarily "hard as hell." Some people experience monogamous marriage to be hard as hell. dating is hard for everyone... It's not the fault of poly. Many...

Magdlyn First, before I say anything, I want you to know I have read you blog and I so happy that you seem to be recovering from your illness. I will pray that your health continues to improve. I am glad you held on to your Hero and he accepted you back on a trial basis, despite you breaking...

UPDATE Well, not that anyone is that interested, but I thought I would update where I am at in my marriage. Been living the mono life for a few months now, and I am not miserable. Yes there have been moments when I missed the freedom to act on my hormones, but I am still very early in repair...

[/B] Please read what Gala Girl wrote again. It appears your wife has been having other lovers out of town and despite you not being thrilled with it you have "tolerated" it and sucked it up. Now, as usual, the next want is local men. And I would not listen to the crap about the NRE petering...

Ok. So I assume by him not being interested in dating means that while that is the case , which is fine, that you and he have decided if there are ANY boundaries or agreements you have reached and that while he has decided to stay mono for now that he is OK with what looks like may be intense...

You might want to worry more about your husband getting hurt by your rush out of the gate than your new crush. Not sure if you have really read anything but one recommendation is that you proceed at the pace of the slowest partner. Have you discussed this online guy with husband and how you are...

And I need to talk to my very monogamous husband about my feelings. It scares me so much. I am so afraid that he will put me into that "him or me" choice position, again (even though that was not my husband, who did that, 15 years ago, it was my ex-boyfriend). I will not be able to make this...

Sorry, Clara. Dinged has it right. You got what you wanted, brought hubby into poly reluctantly. You have a boyfriend. You do not get to comment or decide on how or who he dates. He does it on his terms, the way he wants to, and with who he wants to.

Sounds like you made a very smart decision. The two things you still will need to think about are the one you mentioned about him going along with what you want to hear. If you are truly willing to listen, he needs to stop that style because it can have dire consequences. If he agrees to...

Now there's a question that rings a bell for me because I guess I am about to find out soon. Wish I had a crystal ball so I could answer it right. Since the term poly as an umbrella encompasses a bunch of different relationships dynamics its not something really answerable. Just like some will...

Not sure what this means

Dinged, I was not on the verge of losing him if that means next week. But he was slipping away emotionally from me, and he admitted I was off the pedastal, that our sex was not as special as it had been to him. no, he was not concerned about ME leaving him. He told me if it is what I need to be...

Dinged The answer to the first question was yes my gut was right, but I thought it would be from his behavior for months gradually detaching, especially during intimate times. When you live with someone for so long you just "feel" these things. He obviously had to tell me about the job...