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Indeed, thank you!!

Yeah, that's pretty close, too.

Hmmm. Whistful, melancholic compersion. That's pretty close!!! I'm cool with a non-english word if it fits closely, if anyone has one.

Is there a word for "hopeful for your happiness to increase, but also feeling left behind." Jealous doesn't fit. Envy doesn't fit. it's not compersion per say. More like compersion for their hopefulness, mixed with longing for something that almost might have been. bitersweet. but big...

I'm not allowed to give up. I feel like I'm just awful at relationships in general. I cqre too much in too many directions to give enough consistent care in one direction for very long. meanwhile my entire life feels like a clusterfuck that some how sort of keeps going but I'm not sure how...

I am a fool. There are many different things people can be good at, many different "kinds of intelligence". Some of these have fields or careers that fit well for people who are especially good at certain things. Some of the things people can be really good at include computers, musical...

That's an awesome explanation!! Thank you for sharing!!

Thank you. I'm trying. I know good has been before so probably will be again. Heck there are good things now. I just don't feel good. I feel tired and dumb and needy. Things that were embedded before age 10 include discounting the validity of all of my wants, needs, feelings. Which seems extra...

Not okay. I'm not okay. I have been taking a few steps to try and get more help for myself. Today I had a lot of big angry feelings, it felt like they were going to explode and a few times my words certainly did. I took 2 benadryl at 8/9pm, it's 2:10am and I can't sleep. I had to leave my bed...

While I'm not familiar with anyone having that sort of reaction to Marajuana, that was entertaining! Thank you for sharing!!

Thank you!!

I standardly struggle with Depression, anxiety, and mania. I KNOW that I'm not at MY "normal" level of functionality. I realize I over reacted, and honsrtly, I was in a manic/anxiety panic when I posted this. Thank you all for your feedback. I used to raise eyebrows when ever single parents...

Cross link to new post I made asking help Mostly for my own reference. http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?p=325992#post325992

Here is my blog for what tiny bit of background it will give: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=78313 So, about a month ago, I was in a dark place and feeling myself tip toward abysmal levels of darkness between depression, being very overwhelmed, and having a faith crisis due...

I hope you can find some lovely cemeteries in your current area!! It seems like the ones in smaller towns are cooler to me. But I suppose I'll have to sample more to be sure.

It was both sunny and had a chill breeze, and I didn't realize till looking at the picture that I could have easily put on my sunglasses, which were handily placed on my head. Whoops!! Oh well!! Had one of my Monkeys and he got cold fast, so the visit was brief but nice!!

Had an impromptu, April Fools Day picnic in cemetery. Didn't last long due to chilly wind, but it was nice. I think I can attach pics, will try in a moment.

Awesome!!! Super happy for you to have someone you can converse with on so many topics/levels!! :)

NRE!!! Ah, new Lust!! Oh to feel like a rambunctious teen again at 30!! Such a silly thrill!! Monkey 1 was at school, Monkey 2 was napping, my grands were off taking a load to their new condo. GothPunk had come over to grands (which is about to be mine) to hang out. We were not expecting my...

Cemeteries MIGHT be a part of tomorrow's activities. If it is, I'll let you know!! is there a way to upload pics to here from my phone? I did for the profile image thing, but idk if I can in posts...