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Just when I thought I was all alone. Thanks for posting:-) I am in a similar situation. I am mono. When I discovered this board, I thought I might try poly out and be in multiple relationships. As it turns out, I'm a one guy type of girl. I have major issues with my boyfriend's primary. I've...

I totally understand. Self compassion, love, and forgiveness takes time, but goes a long way.

FoL, you are very empathic towards Si and your husband. Are you going to be able to carry on two lives? What is the toll of this arrangement on you? I get that you couldn't manage both relationships in the past, but you live and you learn. What if Si were out of the picture? Could you be...

I'm 3 months into my relationship. I was adamant about being mono in the beginning and not dating anyone poly. However, that was the only way I knew to relate. Being mono was unchallenged before then, even though I was quite convinced that I am/was. My partner is in established relationships...

Thanks, LR. :) This is a wealth of information. I downloaded the 7 Levels of Intimacy. Already it's resonating. Thanks for indulging the side bar, Hetaera.

Hi, Loving Radiance. I've been lurking and reading a lot. I also just started reading The Ethical Slut, and, my goodness, what an eye opener. What other books would you recommend for someone just getting into this? Is there a recommended reading thread? I've done some reading on...

He spent the night last night. The whole night, and the morning. It was blissful. In other news, I am seriously taking a look at what I want in my relationship(s). Thank you Marcus. I'm reading The Ethical Slut. I've known about poly for a few years now. I read about it a few years back on a...

Yes Marcus, it is Dom/sub. I am doing both for the fist time. I'm an over achiever:-) I really wanted D/s, but the poly part was a whole new concept. So really I voluntarily gave control and power to him. My challenge is that I want to turn the power over. However, I need to be able to feel...

FoL, she said that it was just sex. He didn't. He made it clear that this is a relationship. She said this during our first meeting when I asked her how she feels about poly. They started off with swinging. I should also add that this is a D/s relationship. When she made the comment about this...

Hi Nancy, we have all 3 spoken. She's Catholic. She's always lived with her parents. Except for the year she lived with her aunt. She's Hispanic. It's a cultural thing. I understand it because I have a similar cultural background. People live with their parents until they are married, then they...

FullofLove, I've voiced my desire for more alone time. We haven't seen each other in a couple weeks. Last weekend they were out of town with his family. The weekend before that, they were out of town for her birthday. This weekend I'm going to be with my family. I'm gone during the week. We...

Pollyanna, it's more like her parents live with them for financial reasons. I do have a place of my own. She's welcome in it. Often, when he's there she spends the night also. (Very annoying.) She's the one explaining it to her parents. To hear him tell it, he doesn't care except that he's...

We aren't out. This engagement was out of town. My engagement is out of town also. My thing is not an event. It's just that my aunts and uncle will be at my parents. They are coming from overseas. So, it would be an opportunity for them to meet him if he is going to be a significant part of my...

I am consciously asking myself this for the first time. I want to explore life with this person. I want to have philosophical conversations with this person. I want us to explore each other's internal landscape. I want a soul connection. I don't think that polyamory prevents any of that. Um...

These are all great suggestions. Thank you all:-) Nancy, I don't really have the bandwidth for multiple lovers and I'm not really interested. I'm introverted and I enjoy showering my love with attention. I'm trying this out. Him being with multiple people doesn't seem to bother me as much as...

Massage

This weekend my boyfriend is out of town with his primary at his brother's birthday party. I can't get over that ordinarily this would be something that I would go to if I were in a mono relationship. Next weekend, I'm going to see my family. My aunts and uncle are in from out of town. I'll see...

Hi, things are coming along. Last weekend, one of my metamours was celebrating her birthday. Our boyfriend was with her for the weekend. I only see him on weekends as I travel for work, so, I was a bit frayed. Logically, I had no problem with it being her weekend. Emotionally, I really missed...

I am a secondary in a budding relationship (2 months) and we're not out. The other day my boyfriend and I were at Walmart shopping, when one of his OSO's friends saw us and quite loudly asked what he was doing on this side of town. He stumbled. I'm a fan of authenticity and living your life on...

Yeah:-)