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As a policy, I dislike anything like that, OPP, OVP, monogamy, etc. You only want one lover? Fine. You're a woman who only wants one guy? Okay. It's when that is forced on you AS A RULE that I take issue. I have a defacto OPP. It takes a lot for me to get interested in a guy and wouldn't...

Hmmmm, this really stood out to me as a red flag. If you're right and he is engaging in this risky behavior KNOWING that this would mean losing you (he MUST know this greatly increases his chance of getting her pregnant and that there is a chance she is lying about the pill), than this is...

If used correctly and every time, there is only a 2% failure rate for condoms. Besides that, though, the OP want to learn to be okay with non-monogamy/polyamory. So she doesn't want him to go mono and will still give up part of her time to the the other woman. Even if the cowgirl gets...

And there is that. Personally, I'm less forgiving than Dagferi, and just don't date monos. But it all really depends on who it is you connect with... I'd probably be caught in a hard place if I fell in love with a mono...

When you say that she wants him all to yourself, are you assuming this or do you have proof? I say this, because my ex-metamour made the same claim against me, despite my behavior clearly showing the opposite.

I've heard the same ones over and over, and they're all stupid. 1) Isn't it cheating? No. 2) Don't you feel jealous? No. 3) Isn't poly immoral? Why? 4) Doesn't it hurt the children? Extended families and village communities that raised children never hurt them. Why would this?

Totally appreciate your good intentions, but, seriously. Don't burn yourself out on the little things. You'll need those emotional reserves for when things progress. When it's something simple, that can be asked directly? Just do it. You have to learn to trust your partner's answers...

You are WAY overthinking this. There will inevitably be real problems that arise later. Save your mental anguish for those. Just ask them, hey, am I staying too long? Do you need more alone time? Than accept their answer and move on.

Why would you think she's brave? She already has another relationship of her own, with feelings and commitment. It would be selfish of her to do anything but give him basic courtesy and respect when he pursues his own relationships.

I think it depends on where you live and who you're with, and a host of other variables. It would hurt me a lot if I was too open, but our circumstances will change eventually and it won't be an issue. We do intend to be open at some point. I think you need to assess your situation and decide...

it's easier to move forward than go back. Take your time on this one.

I always slept in his bed, when I was at his place. She would've been pissed if I slept in her bed... I always felt weird that he and she had separate bedrooms, and very clearly did NOT sleep together ever, but felt it wasn't my place to question it...

I was under the impression the others had all been casual. In that case, I dunno. Wait it out?

There's a risk that this means you're mono and can only love one person at a time. If this is true, be honest with your husband. If it passes, than it's just a phase and you're poly.

Hmmm, I misunderstood your relationship. Perhaps I am overly demanding, but I require a LOT in a loving relationship beyond my feelings or their professions of feelings for me. While someone might say they love me, may want to love me, if I cannot eventually be freely affectionate and open...

Simply being more sapiosexual does not make one poly, though its often linked. Most people in open relationships that I know of have a very good emotional/intellectual connection. The difference between them and me is I want multiple RELATIONSHIPS where I love and commit to many; they want to...

I'd worry less about whether your signs are compatible and more about whether the people are. When you try to force any kind of compatibility, whether it's star signs or a particular formation, such as a closed triad, you inevitably run into problems. For example, you picture an ideal world...

While you have a wonderful set up, be careful of using the term "poly" when describing yourself to others. It's not fair to the other woman or women to pretend that a full, loving relationship is possible when you've already decided Jill will always come first. Be especially honest if Jill...

A man in that kind of situation will never be able to give you more than discreet fun on the side. Sorry. Perhaps he'll be able to give you more in the future. My own relationship started out like yours, but than I wanted more, like you. I asked for more and slowly got more and more, until...

Looks like another one who just wanted to be given sympathy. Well, she's not as crazy as my ex-metamour, though the story is similar....Sorry, the other woman isn't obligated to leave, just because you're uncomfortable. This IS what you signed up for when you opened your marriage. Once you...