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what you are going through is the perfect illustration of how fucked up and childish marriage and monogamy can be. Two full grown adults in love waiting patiently for a third adult to give them permission to use their bodies to express that love...or not.

I guess I'm not sure how these past traumatic experiences have anything to do with his discomfort love you having physical relations with his wife. It's good that he's getting them dealt with but there are many people that have no such experiences that still do not like the thought of someone...

Couple privilege combined with you being used as a toy to enhance their relationship.

she claimed open marriage, I guess I could be mistaken

I bet I can guess what his feelings are. First and foremost its always easier to be the guy who walks into an established relationship and becomes the "guy on the side" its a giant ego boost for a variety of reasons. 1. he may assume your husband wasn't that great since you looked outside the...

if you don't want it then I strongly urge you not to do it because this could potentially end your marriage

I'm going to guess that hubby has a one penis policy and is primarily interested in finding a girl that they can share. Will he allow you to have a boyfriend? Ask him this directly and ASAP. If his answer is no, you guys have many challenges to overcome. The least of which is loving others.

I understand that this rule was created for your peace of mind, however your fiancee may find it a rule that she will want to keep more for her peace of mind. If she finds someone but wants limited time with him (mostly sex and some bonding) then the other guy is going to have needs that she...

This is where I'm confused and frankly get fed up with the whole notion of emotional cheating. What does it even mean in her situation when you tell her she "doesn't need to act on her emotions"? She's already having sex with them and that's allowed, she can't help that her emotions ensue...

Your husband is a loser asshole. This is not an open marriage. He is emotionally abusing you. Go see a lawyer tomorrow. Don't even consult with him. You need to show him that you are not helpless and that you can see something through so I would walk into a lawyer's office with the...

I think the fact that she's a friend is a bs excuse. If the relationship sours the friendship doesn't. Unless of course your wife or the friend treat each other shitty from jealousy. You said that your wife's boyfriend is a great guy and you're becoming friends. So if they breakup you may...

Double standards stink and she has no right. Most will come down hard on her from this forum. Whatever freedoms she enjoys with her boy friend should be your freedom.

Maybe you could (and should) rethink your policy of meeting the women before they date. This is a very common theme on these forums. People have varying degrees of desire to have a relationship with their metamours (the other dating partner). Many don't see a need to meet them or talk to them...

You don't really need to trust other women. They don't have a relationship with you, so trust is not needed. The only person you need trust in is your partner. Since jealousy is usually the fear of losing something, let's think of some common fears. Are you: 1. Afraid the women will steal him...

Whoa whoa whoa. It sounds to me like you need to simply move out of your house and have some alone time. Running off to Pakistan with your ldr boyfriend sounds flighty and sketchy at best and perhaps a little dangerous. Have you met your boyfriend? Has it been solely over text and phone?

I think you are behaving a bit of a princess expecting all texts to cease during your time with him. His phone can light up constantly and its not your business. When and how long he takes to answer them is where you may interject yourself in HIS choice to answer them. I think you're jealous...

I think simply stating you are in an open relationship is sufficient. It will scare away the people you dont want to get mixed up with and attract like minded individuals that know what is entailed in such arrangements. The particulars can be discussed after you get to know potentially...

I'm going to take a different stance. One text at 1am isn't being disrespectful. Receiving texts from important people in your life is natural, what is unnatural is expecting a smart phone to be silent for hours and days on end, especially if he didn't tell everybody that he wants it that way...

omg I cringe at this guy. He was resistant to the term boyfriend? Did you guys get permission to use the bathroom during your date? After all, genitalia are involved and by using the bathroom she will know that you have a penis! Sorry for my snark. As always I wish you the best and fear for...

Does it matter? You are opening your relationship to others and "allowing" love and feelings to flourish, that's polyamorous. No two poly relationships are identical but the good ones have one thing in common; communication of boundaries and expectations between all involved.