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Hi Izzy, Awesome to hear things are so good with your new triad.. Welcome to the forum... Nancy

Hi, Alternatevirgo. I'm Nancy. My hubby and I were (until recently) in a V, with him as the hinge. I think you can read and read and you'll still find yourself experiencing things that are new, or you'll need to read more about. A lot of talking is in order all through the process of finding...

Big hugs Lizzy.... I wouldn't tolerate that behavior.. Cheating isn't an open relationship nor is it poly..I wouldn't teach her anything.. and if they are so close why doesn't she already know the in's and out's of his likes and dislikes? I also wouldn't have her be the queen of anything but...

I've commented in Pol's thread and I totally know what you're going through. My hubby (Nutbusterx) and I have just had a break up (two weeks ago) with his coworker. Your situation mirrors ours so unbelievably it's like we wrote both your thread and Pol's. I will ask Nut to comment here after...

Hi Brit.. We are not far from you in Central Cali.. Hope things are good there... Nancy

Hi... Welcome and good luck in your search... Though we (nutbusterx and I) started out thinking that a "unicorn" would be our idea of a perfect poly relationship, our initial foray into poly hood was a long distance gf for him, then a local gf for him. So your thinking and situation could...

Hi, Welcome to the forum.. Hope your successful in your new venture into your old lifestyle.. :) Nancy

It might be helpful (it is to me) to journal all your thoughts, then reread and write more.. write questions or make an email draft to edit and edit again.. Talk and talk and talk and talk..its the best thing. Talk without judgement. He is going thru this and it took alot for him to open up...

I dont think its your job at all to make sure she is ok. Its his job. You cant be responsible for her feelings or insecurities, especially when he started the relationship with her and then told her about you. He needs to be reassuring to both of you and you cant be reassuring to her while your...

So are you saying that when the kids get older she is expendable?? How do you mean that when the kids get older you'll lose motivation for an extra relationship? If your going to lose the motivation for an extra relationship, why bother going through all this now anyway?

"Lying: I don't think she has ever lied to me. I suspect it, but there's no way I can confirm it. And they've all been of the, "I'm tired. Good night." and then she goes to chat with someone else... MAYBE. And even if that's the case, so what? She doesn't have the right to talk to someone else...

The only thing you can control is what you do. If you know that your personality issue is being to competitive with this friend, then stop doing so. Find your own hobby, find your own inner peace, learn to be happy with you and what you do and stop your behavior. I had a jealous issue with...

What was the resolution to the original problem? and how did he handle that? I am guessing he handled it poorly. I dont know that she is more important than you. Much like the person above me who asked. Is he neglecting you or the household in anyway?? There is the ability to love more than...

Hi Kay.. I totally agree that cheating in any form isn't a poly relationship.. I'm sure you can find advice and help with the things that are on your mind here... There is alot to read and plenty of people to talk to... Nancy

Hi Kiwi.. Enjoyable and confusing is a great way to phrase it..lol emotional might be added in there as well...

lolol.. Yes we know... So far away from most of civilization... that's how it feels anyway

We are in the Central California Desert... :)

Hi... Hi.. and Hi.. to all three of you... :p Cant wait to hear some of the things you have learned on your way to becoming a closed triad... Nancy

Hi... Hi.. and Hi.. to all three of you... Cant wait to hear some of the things you have learned on your way to becoming a closed triad... Nancy

I totally agree Marvin and Lizzy... I know of no other poly people in our town. To add to that its an extremely small town where everyone knows everything and everyone's business and it leaves us wondering where there were others we could talk to.. So happy to have found this sight. :D