Search results

That sounds interesting. There's also a Facebook group named "Polyamory Of Suburban Houston" or POSH for short. I haven't engaged with them yet, but that seems like a possible community to connect to.

There’s a decent community in Houston, but I’m more aware of the ENM side. The people I know are more “Swolly” (Swinger+Poly) than strictly poly. There’s a good club scene, especially in North Houston, approaching that enclave of white affluence known as The Woodlands.

It's generally best for poly to date poly, with that on the table from the beginning. But, let's be honest about the dating pool. It's hard to fault guys for casting a larger net and working with what they get. Especially for poly men, it can mean a LOT of effort for very slim pickings. I guess...

I see the concern. Our therapist is poly (ambiamorous) herself. Ultimately, she’s giving a name to my wife’s discomfort. It’s been a useful way to think about it and what my wife wants from me. She was adamant that she “doesn’t share," but now she’s refined that thought down to not sharing my...

Yeah, this can get thorny. I understand the difficulties, but it's also part of the trouble of a conversion, especially in an LTR. I want to respect everyone who might get involved and be upfront. Odds are I can't shift to proper poly unless we decide to wipe the slate clean, start from scratch...

I see good points and I like being challenged. I have to admit, we're starting to trend toward some other ENM model than poly. We're applying some of what we learn to understand what we read only in theory. We have to find something that works for us, and not all the conventional wisdom works...

That's huge. That's THE reason you let the slowest paced partner drive. In the end, if you state your desires and your boundaries and give up the control to your partner, you will make more progress with less resentment than if you give ultimatums and timelines. If you're used to being in the...

You know @Fogul, we're both navigating this situation and learning as we go. I wanted to share my revelation of the week with you. I think it has a lot to do with our common situation. We had a discussion in couples therapy about what loyalty means. It's not just being supportive with your...

Our couples therapist landed a hit with a definition of loyalty that sent me spiraling into that "how was I supposed to learn that if no one taught me?" feeling. She said that loyalty is more than being just supportive and there. There's a component of "allegiance". That's easy in a mono...

Yes, this! I fantasize about reclaiming my wife if she ever got on board with ENM. If you use arrangements like this to inject tension into the relationship, it only works if you relieve that tension. I imagine the first few times you're relieving jealousy, but it eventually changes into...

Hephaestus was the Greek god of fire, blacksmithery, and craft. He wasn't exactly pretty and commonly is depicted with a deformity, as you describe your teeth, but he was an artisan and craftsman to the gods. Despite his challenges, he was skilled at his work, and I regard him as a manly figure...

Comparison is the thief of happiness. For cock size, doubly so. I wanted to try to address this in a way that's constructive to your situation, by way of reframing comparisons. Sure, it's a big confidence boost to men to be objectified like that over other men, but that's called "downward...

That’s a stunning bit of wisdom you laid down there. Keep that flexibility in mind. I’m going to be a lot less negative about asexuality and your chances, because I’ve seen what is damned close to a miracle in my marriage. My asexual wife has a “sex drive” we had to develop, which is to say...

Again, you’re entering this world near where we started. The biggest difference between you and I is that Jess and I started working on our sex life before getting hit with the poly-possibility. We were a work in progress when we took that fateful trip to a swingers club. It’s buried in one of...

I wanted to follow up on this one thing. Asexuals come in multiple flavors. To categorize them by choice or nature or trauma often misses the point. Some of them don’t like the supposed drama, messiness, or ickiness of sexuality. It doesn’t really matter. That’s more of an identity to them...

They're going through their own rough patch. Getting involved with either or both would be fun... but really messy and that's even assuming it didn't violate agreements with Jess. (In fact, the messiness would likely violate our agreements on its own.) I do a lot of living in hypothetical...

I brought up your comment to Sean as a humorous aside. He hesitated enough to set off a flag. I'm actually a little flattered...

Your story really resonates with me. My wife is asexual and I'm not only allosexual, but hypersexual and hyperkinky. We're currently working out our issues between us as a monogamous couple after years of companionate and sexless marriage, but I've been hit with the "polyamorous possibility"...

Oh shit. If the post-COVID ENM boom I’ve heard about is any indication, this event is going to be packed tighter than some of y’all’s shared Google calendar.

Is that a post elsewhere? I can't tell if your comment is directed at me.