Search results

That doesn't play for me. That's like telling someone they can't try a new food unless they know they're going to like it and eat it. In that case, it pretty much encourages people to NOT try it. Now, from the standpoint that people aren't food, :p you don't want to enter into a poly...

I guess I'm one of the few who views "slut" to be negative. And mind you, I do get the concept of reclaiming the word as a positive one in the context of poly, but for me it's a word that still has negative overtones. When someone calls me a slut, they're not doing so as a compliment. :) So...

I have to say when I first read your post, my first thought was also that you're looking for a BFF, not another partner/lover. :) That said I'm inclined to agree with what DrunkenPorcupine wrote:

Joreth, I'm having a really hard time understanding where you're coming from. I went and read some of your blog and livejournal to maybe see if I could get a better understanding and I wound up even more confused. In your section titled "How I Do Poly" you say specifically: Given the...

But you're assuming that everyone has the exact same idea of what is "respectful," and that's just not true. And I'm not talking about radically different ideas, but subtleties of culture, upbringing, etc. It's possible for both people to be acting in a manner that would be "respectful" in their...

This is also a bit of a recent issue for me. My bf and I broke up earlier this summer, and just lately I've been ready to maybe start seeing someone else. But I'm finding it difficult. My relationship with my bf developed over time. We were friends for many years, then segued into a closer...

For me, Facebook friends come in 3 categories: Real life friends (who have complete access) Online friends (who I've met on various sites) Clients (who have limited access) My FB page is as much a marketing tool for my business and my message board as it is for my friends ... so I'm pretty...

This all very much is in line with my thoughts on the subject. Thanks for putting it so succinctly.

Argh. :) I'm very very hesitant to respond to this in light of ImaginaryIllusion's comments about us reaching a deja vu state. But I would like to point out that I'm fairly new to this forum (although not to forums in general - as with yourself, I've been around since the days of BBS), and...

I think that when dealing with potentially painful or hurtful emotional situations, sarcasm is not generally terribly appropriate. Just, I dunno, a little quirk of mine.

I would disagree with this. Don't be so quick to dismiss your own feelings in these situations. Your feelings are your feelings and you still have to work through them, whether others think they are rational or not. And the fact is that your husband *did* do something to create those fears by...

Respectfully, if it happens to you all the time, or it is "always assumed," perhaps you should take a second look at how you write. I am not saying that to be rude or hateful. I say that as someone who has been in that position myself before. I do, however, see a disconnect between what you keep...

Good for you. Honestly when I read through more of the story, the warning bell that sounds in my head is "abuser". That is based on my own history, of course, but I know that the goal of most abusers (whether physical or emotional) is to isolate the victim until she has no one to rely on but...

Redpepper, thanks for your comments. wanted to quote these three paragraphs because they so very closely echo my feelings and thoughts about the subject. It's funny that in my past relationship we actually had very few rules/boundaries. Those that we had were not carved in stone, "This is...

That's what it sounds like to me, as well. I'm so sorry that you're going through this, even incidentally as the support for your husband and his g/f. Just based on what you've written, it seems as if all would be better off separated from B2 and maybe he'll find a relationship more suited to...

Rogue

If they both truly care about you, then there is (was, probably still is) some pain revolving around hurting you, as well. Also, don't discount that Mary may be feeling pain at the loss of your friendship. (Whether or not she hides it, or is willing to admit it, losing a "best friend" is a...

All right then... Let's get this thread back on track: From Joreth's post: I think this is naive. Two people (three people, four people, whatever) can be caring and considerate and still miscommunicate. Or one person's idea of what is considerate could be hurtful to another, all...

You know, I'm saying this quite calmly. It is very frustrating to feel that I was slapped at, and then to be told that I'm working out my "frustration about what's going on in my life," when you actually don't know a single thing about what actually *is* going on in my life, ok? I'm not saying...

I put out a personal situation that actively happened in my life as an example - not a "hypopthetical" or an "analogy". I think I said enough in my example to indicate that it was a very painful time for me and for my husband. To respond with: ... implies that we had issues because we are...