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*"So back to the debate. Should you adjust yourself to fit other people? Compromise? I think you should, but only if you can do it and feel good about it." i can relate to this, it was a question i asked myself when i wanted to be poly and my partner didn't, in the end he changed his mind but...

This came up in another post but thought it best to start a new thread, i have never thought of my relationship in terms of structure, - until now when i read the post about structure and had a think about it, i have also never considered closing my relationship(s) so that it is polyfi...

reading this with intrest i really want to know more :)

i know why i fear being vulnarable, it is deep rooted in my past, 2 of the men i am currently seeing most def deserve my trust, the other who i am not seeing yet has hurt me in the past and will have to earn the trust back before he comes back into my life, we are doing a lot of talking at the...

greenearthal that is fantastic advice, the one thing i do struggle with is "Allow yourself to be vulnerable" sometimes that is more scary than anything else, becuase admitting i am vulnerable seems so hard for me, but of course i am, becuase everyone is, especially when it comes to love and...

from reading everyone elses posts here i think i still have a lot to learn :) we can always learn from each other, Jools

yep i get that, just hoping my question didn't get burried before anyone had chance to respond actually typing out the question has helped me think of some of the things im asking so its always useful to have somewhere to vent Jools

im wondering the issues that can develop as things get more serious, and yes how people with poly longevity do make it work :) Jools

i tried to draw a digarame to explain how things are to a friend it just looked way to complicated, when you take into consideration C has a partner and me and her are also intamite i dont' see it as complicated or messy in a bad way, i see it as having lots of people around me that love and...

just wondering if anyone has any input i seem to be a bit unlucky with any of the posts i start :(

i have to totally agree with everything you are saying i think its really difficult to find someone that both partners will fall in love with equally, every relationship is diffrent and unique and i think putting any structure on things will limit the natural progression, we have never looked...

I'm Jools. I'm 25. I am a support worker. I love art and write a lot of poetry. I am halfway through training to be a person-centred therapist. I have been with C for almost 6 years. We have been poly for nearly 3. We had discussed an open relationship as a possibility from the start, but...

you are def not a monster (((((hugs)))))) Jools

think about how you will feel if you don't do anything about this and you spend the rest of your life longing for more, will you regret it? Jools

We have been poly for a number of years, :) about 3, and we have been together for 6 as a couple... so... we are not new to this, During that time iv dated, 3 other men, none of them have been long term for various reasons, the main one being it i just never developed intense or strong...

It’s more than butterflies in the pits of my belly I may have a bat hurling around in there. I am MORE than in love with you. I am the moth dancing around the fire, scalding myself repetitively as I enjoy every flicker of flame . It isn’t rational that you have the force of a jet plane...

this is obviously wrote with such feeling and is so sad, it reminds me of my situation, and it makes me want to tell you not to give up hope that you will have that again. :( Jools

I am only 25, so i guess it wasn't so long ago i was 21, i had to grow up extreemly fast, got kicked out of home at 16, was homeless for a little while, and at 20 i met C, who at the time was 23, we fell in love very quickly, and moved in together after 6 months, so by 22 i had bought a house...

im wondering if you are afraid because you think if she loves her other partner that will take away some of the love she has for you, i know that i had this way of thinking about love for a long time and it made falling for someone else, or C falling for someone else a scary idea, in the end i...

I don't know if you have seen this before, but this is a really good resource for people starting out in polyamory. It helped me and my partners out a lot. I give it to everyone who gets involved with me to read over. http://www.xeromag.com/fvpoly.html You guys seem to be on right track. You...