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NRE, for me, tends to be that butterflies-and-questions time. Love is when I trust, I understand, and I feel understood; it's that blissful combination of friendship and romance. I'm not actually a fan of NRE, mostly because I associate it with not-yet-certainty. I like knowing I'm loved and...

DarayTala, what are you calling "sex" here? Penetration, handjobs, blowjobs...? Is Lady not even open to receiving pleasure? We have worked out certain compromises for ourselves, but not all couples can be happy this way, which I understand. A sudden, strong aversion to sex is a sign that...

That has never happened to me, and if it ever does, whoever tries it will find himself at the wrong end of a kick to the junk. I hope I am wearing sharp shoes on that day. I suppose not associating with this... "person"... is not an option?

Ooh, which bit of central/upstate? Quite a few of us are scattered between Rochester and Syracuse.

For the past four years, it's actually gone quite well, says one of his partners. We've gone at it with openness and transparency at the fore. When one of us three hurts another, we do say what we're feeling and it gets sorted. I hope I have not led her to believe she will be left. If I have...

Another "answering the question without reading the thread" response: FWIW, I went into polyamory wanting a lot of that, too. We did realise that living together and combining finances would be impractical, but the rest of it is all there. We were talking about his retirement as early as two...

The secondary before me kept telling Darling "Oh, my niece's fiancé is working on this musical; it's great; he's so talented!" He thought nothing of it except, perhaps, "how neat." A couple of years ago, I watch this viral video where the groom gives the bride, as a gift, a performance of...

Nutella is only toxic if you're allergic! :D

p.s. THAT probably is doing their daughter more harm than your presence. Especially if they're doing it while the daughter and her friend are there. Jesus. That's what bars and babysitters are for.

Darlin', it is not irrational to be angry about that. Absolutely a "Fuck you" moment, and may I suggest you play them the song by Cee Lo Green? Then make like the Ladykiller himself and get a better lover or lovers, people whose kids can handle polyamory. (People who probably parent much better...

Try Nutella. Everything goes down better with Nutella.

That was my parents' approach. Actually, I think my dad's disappointed I never scored him a dime bag from the stoners on the corner across from the school. ("Daddy, your job does drug testing...") He came of age in the sixties; naturally he did a bit of experimenting of his own! So he and Mum...

Eh, whatever they liked. I mean, I wouldn't say no to joining a couple that registered high on the Kinsey, but I don't need that to be happy. Also, nope, their relationship is not my porn! There's porn for that.

Apology accepted. So if she's brilliant and he's brilliant, get the three of you together and talk about your fears. (And if you can, talk with her alone. We fear what we don't understand.) The most anyone can do is reassure you. It's on you to trust what he's saying. If you perceive his...

You're lucky not to know. You're lucky not to need medication. Give great thanks. It could always be worse. Both. You are wrong to treat her as if she's dirt. He is wrong not to care that this hurts you. And you never did give the impression that you cared whether it was right to veto her. You...

I can find half the people I know in the DSM, including myself. I've had a doctor suspect I was borderline, and I was behaving a lot like you are now. I also know from depression, since it runs in the family, so I'm glad yours is only mild. The funniest thing about such vehement denials is...

You can't know by magic, though, and nobody ought to expect that. It's not human. It's entirely possible. I have absolutes from which I do not stray, and then I have the stuff that doesn't matter as much, so there is room for compromise. If I have to be stubborn about my absolutes and it loses...

Being one of them: it worked. We communicate better on our own terms, in our own time, than we do when we feel we have to. :D On the other hand, a) I met them at the same time, so no hiding allowed and b) I would've wanted to meet her regardless. Been eager, even. So I am a very different...

I have to ask, because weddings are super-high-stress: how long have you been engaged and when is the wedding? Could this possibly be contributing to your unease? You would not be wrong to say "Stop! Too much to deal with!" until after the wedding. Taking care of yourself is not hypocrisy.

I don't actually have any advice, but I do think it's rather a blow to lose your job because your job is shady. It's pretty natural to be depressed and therefore not in a place to make major life choices (including decisions about poly) after that hell. I mean, shit, my dad got fired from the...