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Good days and bad days. Sometimes I'm doing ok, and think that it is all for the best. And then I get these huge waves of grief because something pops into my head - I'm reminded of something C said, something MrB did - and it's overwhelming. The relationships were so very different but now it...

It all sounds very relaxed.. I am happy for you!

... and some thoughts about dating, which I want to write down here to remind myself later. Next time I start to date someone I want to take things sloooooowww. Become friends first. Not share my whole life story on the second date. Spend time together, get to know each other. Making suspense...

Thank you all, for your kind words. I guess I'm not taking a break from the forums after all. Writing about everything here does really help. MeeraReed, wow.. I read before, somewhere on the forum, that you once lost several people at once. But this is a truly horrible story. I am so sorry you...

MrBrown broke up with me. Or I guess not really broke up with me, but said that for now he just wants to be friends. He gave me reasons that are valid, and that I could have seen coming, and are too painful to elaborate on here. I haven't heard from BGuy or Knight in weeks. I love Ren and he...

Things are still not very awesome around here. Had 2 first dates last week... one with a guy I'm a 99 % match with on OKC. He is a GREAT guy.. I mean on paper he's perfect, and even in real life everything about him was good except for the fact that I felt zero attraction. I wrote about this on...

I'm sorry you're feeling alone. I can sympathize, I've felt lonely quite a bit since C and I broke up. I think it's a natural part of a break up, to feel that void that isn't going to be filled, really, by spending time with someone else. Even if you feel the break up was for the best, there is...

I'm sorry you're feeling sad about this. I don't think it's a merely theoretical rejection btw, and I think you have every right to mourn the fact that this relationship is not going to be the way you would prefer it to be. Adjusting expectations is always hard. You have to think carefully if...

pretty much what Magdlyn says. and: browse, read profiles, look at your matches, and then approach guys yourself. I've met a number of nice people through OKC (one now my FWB, a couple that became friends, another one I'm dating now with definite potential) and all of those were approached by...

the rules my husband and I had when we first started dating others now make me laugh... and cringe.. and laugh some more. But the truth is: I don't think we could have gotten to the point where we are now (with very little rules) without that rule-drive period in our lives. So by all means...

thank you fuchka that was beautiful to read. It reminded me of one my favorite Pema Chodron quotes You are the sky Everything else, it's just the weather It is a really good analogy. My grandmother, who, had she lived in modern times would have been diagnosed with depression (in her days, it...

been thinking about this. I DON'T feel physically mentally and emotionally solid enough right now. I'm in a pretty bad place. Anxious, sad, restless and depressed. Feels like grieving C is finally happening. No more feeling relieved - just sad. Like I failed (I know I didn't). Feel like crying...

See, it's stories like this that make me think I sometimes judge too fast, too soon! Yesterday's guy... such a great guy. His response to me telling him I didn't feel a lot of chemistry? Text book perfect. A hint of disappointment, just enough to flatter me; honesty; respect; expressing...

Yeah I already emailed him. Still interested in the dynamics of all this though! For some reason I feel like a dating newbie all over again.

IP and wildflowers, thank you for your stories. I've been thinking about what you both wrote. I think the key for me is that I need to fel that I CHOOSE my behavior in this. Wether it is going to the hospital and sit with my parents, or tell them 'no I can't make it today but I'll be there the...

I do! I do!

I'm sorry Mya. It hurts. Good that you are reaching out to your other partners for support. I felt the same way after breaking up with C, so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life. hugs!

A little background: I never dated much. I met my husband when I was very young. When I started dating a couple of years ago, I had a very practical approach: usually already on the first date, I would tell the guy whether or not I was attracted to him and could see something more than...

Ha, that's a good one! Very true in all sorts of relationships. I think my problem is with the 'do things because it feels good to do so'... I feel like a bad person because being a loving, caring daughter to my parents, doesn't make me feel good, but makes me want to run, scream, and drink a...

Why did the 2 of you break up? Why do you need to be his primary? Could you be in a relationship with him, as the secondary? All good questions to ponder before starting an open relationship with someone.