Search results

Yeah, Mike needs to get his ethics in order. As the person here who's versed in poly, and as someone who knows your marriage just went through a rough patch, the LAST thing he should be doing is encouraging you to be dishonest because he thinks your husband might not be ok with things!!! Just...

Just to clear things up, is this actually a triad -- meaning your husband is also involved romantically with your bf -- or a vee -- meaning you're involved with two people who are not romantically involved with each other? My sense is that it's the latter. If it were the former, it would still...

So much random bickering on the boards, lately... I wish people could just ignore each other if it's not related to the topic at hand, or take it to PM. This sort of back and forth is tiresome and distracting. Gonna take my own advice and not reply if anyone responds to this, I just really...

I got a case of genital warts when I was 17. I was devastated at first. Slowly, over the years I've come to see it as a good thing, because it gives me a simple way to say two things at once to new partners -- 1) I'm a trustworthy person to cares about you and respects you, and 2) if there's...

I feel like veto power makes sense before a relationship starts, as in "This person really sketches me out. I wish you wouldn't start dating them." But after a relationship is underway, that's a terrible thing to have hanging over your heads, the thought that what you're building could get...

I'm no child psychiatry expert, but it seems to me like introducing a new parent at age 11 would be pretty tough for him to really accept? I would more expect her be, like, an Aunt, someone who should be listened to and respected, but not a third parent.

You have the right to request any changes that you want/need, and to set boundaries of your own. If a couple comes to you with a ridiculous rule like "You have to fuck both of us if you want to fuck either of us," then they're not really interested in you as a person, just in how you can fulfill...

I suppose you could say I'm the hinge in a couple of V's. Gia is dating me and Davis is dating me and Clay is dating me and none of them are dating each other. One of partners, Davis, isn't seeing anyone else. While with Gia and Clay I feel perfectly comfortable mentioning my other partners in...

I do. I've found that thinking hard about sex work prompts me to think hard about work in general -- the different ways that we sell our time and our bodies and our selves.

I've mentioned here, very briefly, that Clay has done sex work before. I didn't ask him much about it at first. Izzy, the partner he's been with the longest, has been an escort for five years. I was totally cool with that in theory, but when Clay brought up the possibility of us going...

Really glad to hear that things seem to be calmer and happier for you lately. I'm sure there are still rough patches, but, yeah, it's just great to see you seem to be slowly emerging from the worst of it.

This is pretty much exactly what I was going to post. Talk to each one of them, explain that you're open to the idea of things staying as they are, but are also interested in whether more would be possible. See what happens. If more isn't possible, make them as low a priority as they make you --...

Last night, I accepted a last-minute invitation to watch Bee while Gia and Eric went to see a show that she had worked on the technical aspects of (got paid and everything!). For once, I didn't have anything else planned on a Saturday evening, so I was very happy to jump in, very happy to see...

Cool. ^_^ As for telling them: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=921

Hey Tommy. Sorry about all the harshness you've been receiving here. My impressions/advice -- You have a friend/lover who you've known for several years. You're planning to do a trial move-in with the possibility of a long-term commitment (marriage). You have an open relationship, and both have...

Good thoughts, Ssandra. I have the same question, how long have you all been together? If it's been years and your dynamics are all going great, awesome! If this is less than a year old, I would strongly caution against everyone living together. Living together can bring to light problems that...

Three and a half years total. A year before she got pregnant, then through the pregnancy, and now the little boy is almost two. I agree, your friend put it very well. :)

You could very easily be having nearly identical fears in a mono relationship. Fearing that your partner will get bored of you, doesn't like sex with you all that much, or that you'll screw things up are insecurities that are very general... do you think this is actually because of poly, or is...

Wait, which is it, three years or three months? Why are you considering marrying someone who does not know you very well? How did this topic even come up? What do you hope to get out of marriage? Sorry to bombard you with questions when you're looking for answers, but it's hard to know how to...

Hey, just wanted to say that, as someone in a poly relationship with a new parent, it's nice to see someone else who seems to be successfully managing it so far (I know it's early days, but everything you've written sounds very reasonable and workable to me). Some poly folks seem to think that...