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It feels vulgar to post about good times when things stand where they do between me and Davis. But, well, my life continues on. And this blog is the chronicle of my poly life. So, I won't go into great detail, but I will at least record the basics -- I watched Bee for seven hours on Saturday...

My hangout night with Davis was low-key and pleasant. It was strange, the way we avoided letting our bodies touch, but otherwise it was very normal. I began to get tired early. When I mentioned it, he suggested that perhaps I should head home. He looked pensive. I asked him what was on his mind...

I'm really glad you found it helpful, and as others have said, good on both of you for thinking hard and taking difficult advice. Just a quick thought -- Why would it be unfair to her life partner for her to date you, but not unfair to your husband? (I assume we've gotten past the point of...

Thank you! I feel like I took this advice, and love did, in fact, win the election. :)

Good advice! I'll have a lot of time to practice it in the first week of July, when I'm going across the country for a friend's wedding and staying a week at a hostel to explore her part of the world. It's going to be so very good to have that time to recharge and reset.

Davis called me today while I was at work. I closed my door and took the call. It was a short conversation. He said that he wanted to hang out tomorrow night (we had talked about doing that previously, but then had left it up in the air after our fight). I'm going to go to his place and cut his...

Oh, that's rough. :/ Sorry to hear it.

I've seen "incredibly strong" monogamous partnerships fall apart. Not all, obviously, I'm not anti-monogamy. But polyamory forces you to work on your issues, to face jealousy and insecurity, to get better at communication and time management and acceptance than you were before... if it's going...

Sometimes I just post links, including to my own past writings. Sometimes I get worked up and rant afresh. (This is ranting for me, generally... ha, just don't get me started on consent or BDSM. Those end up as actual rants.) Anyway, it just depends on how I feel. It always comes out...

Fair warning, I haven't read most of the responses, mainly just the OP. I'm a bi female who's not in a primary relationship, a former aspiring unicorn myself, actually. (Couples are hot!) I've been polyamorous since I was a teenager, and have read a TON of individual accounts of polyamorous...

Heh, and this is what I meant by saying I was in no position to judge your choices, so many layers here. I felt a bit silly posting in the first place, knowing I'd likely be off the mark in some way. Anyway, wishing you all the best.

RP, I'm in no position whatsoever to judge your choices, but I did want to say, if I were Mono I'd be deeply wounded that you're willing to consider exploring monogamy now, with someone you just met on OKC, no less, when it was never an option with him. Why not consider being mono with him, as...

I'm sorry to hear about your situation, Cleo. Going from having PIV to not having it in a relationship would be really rough. May I ask why C can't use condoms? Maybe you guys could try female condoms? I had been thinking that Davis and I could just go back to condom use, which was our standard...

I don't think this makes sense. A monogamous couple is completely safe from anything that one of them didn't already have. And since it's extremely unlikely that, between the two of them, they have every STI known to man, if any at all, without ever having had any recognizable symptoms, that...

It's always fascinating to me how OPs here often end up acting as Rorschach tests for those who respond. That's true of me as much as anyone else of course. Anyway, my point being, dont take any of it too much to heart, OP, or feel like you need to defend or justify yourself.

Clay and I have been involved for just about three months. This weekend, we stopped using barriers. I could go on and on about my thinking. I outlined some of it here just now. It's a decision that really would have surprised the me of four months ago. I had to unlearn a lot of ingrained...

I know very few women who use barriers for casual sex with other women, for the record. I'm all in favor of dental dams and gloves if that's what you need to be comfortable, but transmission rates of STIs for lesbian sex acts are, objectively, really low. It's no different than her "unprotected...

This. I may not personally believe that those needs are likely to be stick-to-able when the rubber hits the road -- love + lust = powerful like woah -- but that's for the OP to find out, and it doesn't make her a "tease" as long as she's straightforward with people.

See also: http://tacit.livejournal.com/295369.html

I'm so sorry you're in this situation, finallyhome. As has already been pointed out, while this type of behavior may be common, it's not okay. It's in fact quite cruel. For her to read: http://davidlnoble.com/so-somebody-called-you-a-unicorn-hunter/