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On the sex part....when I started sleeping with Nudge, J preferred SOME details because it made him feel like he knew what was going on instead of picturing us donig crazy, wild, better stuff I wasnt doing with him. i was happy to share, and also add things to our sex life if he was interested...

Agree with Dag. A written list might have thrown her, I know i wrote some thoughts down to talk to Nudge the other day, but I didnt hand him the list, I just referenced it while talking to him. Also...curious...did you decide to be poly BEFORE getting married? because 4 months in is a very...

I hope she can work through that discomfort. Nudge's wife and I experience that. I am taller than her, curvy but not heavy, with an ample chest. She's short, tiny, and muscular. Nudge loves the differences, so neither of us have anything to worry about. :)

That is a big guy! I suppose we can all say we have these preferences, but it can come down to personality. Nudge is actually a much smaller guy than my usual would be, but he's pretty darn fit and cute. hehe

lol love this

Fat wouldn't fly for me, no matter the age. Call me Shallow Hal. :p I mean, my guys are very physically different, so it's not like I have a set 'type' (though Nudge does have me on an older man kick. heheheh). But I do think you could weed people out somewhat, physically, on OKC. Say my...

I'm really curious what her take on marriage was...

I don't consider being poly to be never wanting commitment. I feel committed to both my husband and my boyfriend for different reasons. My husband and I share a home, finances, children, a long relationship, and the agreement to strive to never divorce, so we are married, although we were...

I meant that in my experience, men get more wigged out by their partner with other women then women do. THough this is certainly not the case with me, so i shouldnt make a generalization.

And does it matter if there were no fluids besides salivia in my mouth, followed by a mint, or a twinkie? (i just ate a twinkie)

Im also curious if there is a time limit....if i see one of my guys and am intimate with him, and i dont see the other guy until 5 hours later without getting to brush my teeth, is it still gross?

lmao IYE, i didnt think about this stuff much before but now you guys are going to have me sniffing Nudge

I feel like i should clarify what I had said, I was trying to say to the OP that if he was feeling his sexual needs were being neglected while his spouse is meeting both hers and someone elses, yeah that kinda sucks. Though the answer isnt neccessarily to try to "make" wife have any more sex...

Hooray in deed marcus, hooray in deed. ;) AS to the first part, yeah your probably right. Im sure youve noticed by now i get really protective of J's feelings (it has to do with our long and sorted past) and in fact, maybe he doesnt even feel that way.

*Disclaimer on what I just posted, I used the "over 50" thing as an example at this specific point in time, while I'm still under 40. lol

I'm going to have to disagree with you here. If I meet someone in person, and they are over 50 and fat, I'm not going to feel any chemistry, regardless of how charming they are. I think physical attraction and chemistry go hand in hand, and with OKC you see if you have chemistry with people...

That is a nice practice, but a lot of people cant. J and I have little kids, so someone has to be home with them. We did have one night were J stayed at a party with some friends and Nudge came and stayed with me at home with my kids, maybe J was more comfortable this night but it wasnt the...

I agree with Marcus...I feel like you might be over reacting a touch. When I come home from Nudge's house J may pauise and say "did you brush your teeth?" and if i havent i make a quick trip to the bathroom before we kiss. Because I know how he feels about this, I always try to use mouthwash...

I whole heartedly agree. and nice use of internet meme

Sounds to me hes NOT getting it 3.5 times a week....hell, im happy if between my guys I get 4-5 times a week, but i think J would be pretty upset if Nudge got the majority of that and he got the short end of the stick. For me, even if I find its Nudge thats realyl getting me going, I still can...